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Bacon’s Tales of Terror

Welcome my friends to my monthly Bacon’s Tales of Terror.  

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Today we have a great one for you.  You see this is something that I saw.  Me and mom were going through some neighborhoods in her Smart car.  You know just driving around hoping that the flow of the car would make us sleepy.  What?  Yes we do that.  Mommy needs help sleeping sometimes – snorts.

So there we were on a back street and that’s when I saw this.  I started snorting… of course after I ducked down from being scared.  What the heck was that?  Mom had to make a circle and come back for a second look.  That’s when she saw it.  She would have ducked too but being in the Smart car there wasn’t much room.  So then we had to make a third circle.  You know to get it on camera.

What the heck were these people thinking?  What the heck is that?  A bird bath?  A head?  A head in a bird bath? Who lives at the house – Satan?  The Munster family?  The Adams Family?  Do birds really “drink” from that fountain?  All great questions.  What would YOU do or feel if that was in your neighborhood?  Would you walk by the house during the day?  What about night?  Would you be brave enough to walk to the door on Halloween?

 
28 Comments

Posted by on 05/13/2015 in Bacon, Bacons Tales of Terror

 

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Daddy Has Done It Now

 

20140718-093932-34772922.jpgOh my friends.  This is Mouse Girl.  We call her MG or sometimes OMG (oh Mouse Girl) – snorts.  She is Pissed at daddy.  That’s right – that’s Pissed with a capital P.  You know that means business.  Shakes piggy head.  She is giving daddy the back, the shoulder, not talking to him and won’t come to him. I told you.  She means business.

For her to be this mad, you know daddy had to do something really bad.  I mean, she ❤ her daddy.  She thinks he walks on water and does no wrong.  Well… that was before the incident.  Oh yes my friends.  There was an incident this past weekend.  An incident that can not be forgiven any time soon.  An incident that shall be remembered in the mind of MG forever and ever amen.  You want to know what happened?  Come closer and I’ll tell you.  I can’t say it too loud in case MG is listening.  Okay, you ready?

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Like me here at the Hotel Thompson, Mouse Girl and Hemi are slightly spoiled.  Just a bit.  They don’t know that they are purr things.  In fact, do any of us here really know that we are not humans?  That’s probably the better question.  These two purr things don’t think they need to drink from a bowl.  Oh no.  That’s way too common for them.  They have to drink from the pedestal sink in the bathroom.  They are insistent too.  In fact, we have to keep the bathroom door closed because if not they would be in there constantly playing and partaking in their “personal water fountain”… rolls piggy eyes.  Here’s a picture of them together on their grazing fountain:

 This picture was taken a while back when both were a lot smaller but you get the idea.  Well, Hemi can jump straight from the floor to the sink.  He’s flexible like that – go Ninja skills.  But Mouse Girl, well she’s a little hefty on the back side as you can see from the first recent picture of her back – snorts.  She has to jump on the commode and then jump on the sink.  It’s a system that works for her.  That is until this weekend.

You see when the toilet seat is down or the lid is closed, it’s fine to jump on, balance and then jump on the sink.  But this past weekend someone left the seat completely up.  That person shall remain nameless oh man of the house who forgot to lower the seat which is the way it should always be left.  Attention women – are you following me now?  Let me remind you though that although I am a man piggy, I do not lift the seat or use these facilities.  I have my own potty patch in my bedroom that I keep clean.  Just so you know.  Direct hate male of leaving the toilet seat up to Man of the House, Hotel Thompson.  Snorts.

Let me set the picture up for you.  It was the middle of the night.  Daddy had went to the bathroom and came back to bed.  Mommy decided she should go as well.  She stumbles down the hall in a half asleep/half awake mode while Mouse Girl follows.  Mom hardly ever turns on the light in the middle of the night during one of these visits.  She opens the door to the bathroom and Mouse Girl walks into the room.  Then she heard SPLASH!

You *KNOW* this did not end well.  When mommy heard the SPLASH, she flipped on the light.  OMP (oh my pig!)  Mouse Girl was soaking wet and stuck in the toilet fussing.  Not hurt and nowhere near drowning but stuck and super soaked.  It was not a happy moment for her.  On one hand, mommy wanted to say thank you because it could have been her.  On the other hand, mommy wanted to laugh because that was one soaked kitty.  And then on the other foot, poor Mouse Girl.  Then, mom said those famous words, “Honey, you need to come in here.”

Daddy fussed and stumbled down the hallway.  I have to admit that he was semi-asleep up until the point he got to the bathroom and heard Mouse Girl meowing and fussing.  And then mom fussing at him about this is quote, “Why, we don’t leave the lid UP”.  Mommy finally got Mouse Girl out, bathed her a second time and dried her off.  All of this around 2:00AM.  Mouse Girl has been mad at daddy every since… with a good reason don’t you think?  Snorts.

Your parents ever do something like this with consequences?  Do tell.

 
51 Comments

Posted by on 08/04/2014 in Bacon, Hemi and Mouse Girl

 

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