Bacon’s mom here. Don Juan is now considered a bratty elf beyond any kind of help. So he sends my picture to Santa that’s great. But did he have to send my picture via Playboy magazine? You can’t lie Don Juan. The proof was in yesterday’s posting that Bacon did. We won’t even discuss how much Bacon charged on daddy’s credit card to get back all of those magazines. Shakes my head.
And now you have way overstepped your boundaries here at the Hotel Thompson.
Messing with the kids is one thing. Messing with the husband is another thing. But messing with my collectible Barbie dolls – shaking head. That’s where I have to draw the line.
When I took a nap yesterday – cause Lord knows we can’t sleep at night with that freak running around rapid – I dreamed of my favorite Super Hero – Wonder Woman and what she would do with that freakzoid with her lasso of truth – giggles. We should only know how he felt about being tied up by my number one hero – HA!
No – not you my friends. Never you. Television commercials. That’s it. Have you noticed the lies that spew out of that box? I’m here to tell you it’s true. Lies – Lies – Lies. Products that do this. Clothes that make you feel that. Shaking my head. Lies. Whatever happened to truth in advertising? I bet you are asking yourself why I’m so pigcited over something that you already knew. I’ll tell you why in one word – Mom.
You see, mom sweet mom, saw a certain commercial on television. After watching it, she got this ‘look’ in her eyes. I’ve seen that look my friends. It means trouble. And in this case it was trouble with a capital T. The next day, she came home with a bag in her hand. Took out the product, looked at daddy and tried the product. After opening her eyes, she looked at daddy again. I didn’t get it. He was still the same. Mom on the other hoof, lost it, snorted and went into the kitchen. You want to know what commercial it was don’t you? Okay, I’ll show it to you. But let me tell you straight up. It doesn’t work. Snorts with piggy laughter.
Bacon’s mom here. Thank goodness it is almost over and done with and that little fleabag called Don Juan can go back into hiding. He has been mischievous beyond belief this year and we are all just sick of it here at the Hotel Thompson. Messing with the kids is one thing. Messing with the husband is another thing. But messing with my collectible Barbie dolls – shaking head. That’s where I have to draw the line.
When I took a nap yesterday – cause Lord knows we can’t sleep at night with that freak running around rapid – I dreamed of my favorite Super Hero – Wonder Woman and what she would do with that freakzoid with her lasso of truth – giggles. We should only know how he felt about being tied up by my number one hero – HA!
Welcome back my friends to the reveal of the five statements. Which one did you guess was true? Did you pick it right away or did it take some work in thinking about each one? Just what kind of person is my mommy? Let’s see if you got it right.
Statement #01 – Mom got a sport letter and award in Track when she was in high school. Winner-Winner. Mommy actually was the assistant to the track coach in high school for two years and kept the scores for all meets. This is how she gained her letter and award. Snorts – you thought she ran didn’t you? If mom ran, she says she would have two black eyes and two broken knees. Now that is hilarious! AND who was the first person to guess it correctly – my brother Easy. He knows my mommy!
Statement #02 – Mommy loves Cabbage Patch Kids. Really? Mommy despised Cabbage Patch Kids. If you are a true follower, you have read her story about the demise of her *cherished* Cabbage Patch Kid in a fierce game of Cowboys and Indians – snorts with piggy laughter.
Statement #03 – Mom graduated with a C average in high school. C student – oh no. Mommy was an honor graduate – straight A’s. In fact, some would say she was a nerd! The shock of that huh?
Statement #04 – Mom’s first pet she ever had was a snail named Igor. This would have been cool but again no. Mom’s first pet was a dog named Beast.
Statement #05 – Mom and dad met when mom was working her pole at her second job. Now I had to throw this in there. Of course it didn’t happen this way. But once, mom/dad went to a book store when they were dating. Mom wrote a check and the lady asked for her work number. Daddy did tell the lady it was the Cheetah Club (which was a strip joint in Atlanta, Georgia). The lady replied, “Yeah, right. I don’t think anyone with Holly Hobby checks would be a stripper!”. Now *that’s* funny.
Hey – Let’s play a game. Oh no – don’t look afraid. This is a fun game. I’m sure you will just love it. Really – you can come closer to read this bloggy – I won’t bite… maybe just nibble – snorts. My game is called Truth or Lies. I’m going to tell you three statements. You have to figure out which one is the truth – two are lies. Are you ready? This time, I’ll keep it pretty easy for you.
Mommy used to be a phone operator. Now stop it. Not *that* kind of phone operator. People said that she had a great voice – sexy with a twinge of southern charm.
Daddy once ran a marathon in downtown Atlanta, Georgia for the 4th of July – the Peachtree Road Race.
Mommy’s favorite meal is pork – squeals and hides.
Miniature pot bellied pig and friends - Bacon, Houdini, Hemi and all of the Rock Clan with Journalist Rocky the Squirrel all out looking for adventures from the Hotel Thompson.
Mommy used to be a phone operator. Now stop it. Not *that* kind of phone operator. People said that she had a great voice – sexy with a twinge of southern charm.
Piglove 