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Daddy Has Done It Now

 

20140718-093932-34772922.jpgOh my friends.  This is Mouse Girl.  We call her MG or sometimes OMG (oh Mouse Girl) – snorts.  She is Pissed at daddy.  That’s right – that’s Pissed with a capital P.  You know that means business.  Shakes piggy head.  She is giving daddy the back, the shoulder, not talking to him and won’t come to him. I told you.  She means business.

For her to be this mad, you know daddy had to do something really bad.  I mean, she ❤ her daddy.  She thinks he walks on water and does no wrong.  Well… that was before the incident.  Oh yes my friends.  There was an incident this past weekend.  An incident that can not be forgiven any time soon.  An incident that shall be remembered in the mind of MG forever and ever amen.  You want to know what happened?  Come closer and I’ll tell you.  I can’t say it too loud in case MG is listening.  Okay, you ready?

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Like me here at the Hotel Thompson, Mouse Girl and Hemi are slightly spoiled.  Just a bit.  They don’t know that they are purr things.  In fact, do any of us here really know that we are not humans?  That’s probably the better question.  These two purr things don’t think they need to drink from a bowl.  Oh no.  That’s way too common for them.  They have to drink from the pedestal sink in the bathroom.  They are insistent too.  In fact, we have to keep the bathroom door closed because if not they would be in there constantly playing and partaking in their “personal water fountain”… rolls piggy eyes.  Here’s a picture of them together on their grazing fountain:

 This picture was taken a while back when both were a lot smaller but you get the idea.  Well, Hemi can jump straight from the floor to the sink.  He’s flexible like that – go Ninja skills.  But Mouse Girl, well she’s a little hefty on the back side as you can see from the first recent picture of her back – snorts.  She has to jump on the commode and then jump on the sink.  It’s a system that works for her.  That is until this weekend.

You see when the toilet seat is down or the lid is closed, it’s fine to jump on, balance and then jump on the sink.  But this past weekend someone left the seat completely up.  That person shall remain nameless oh man of the house who forgot to lower the seat which is the way it should always be left.  Attention women – are you following me now?  Let me remind you though that although I am a man piggy, I do not lift the seat or use these facilities.  I have my own potty patch in my bedroom that I keep clean.  Just so you know.  Direct hate male of leaving the toilet seat up to Man of the House, Hotel Thompson.  Snorts.

Let me set the picture up for you.  It was the middle of the night.  Daddy had went to the bathroom and came back to bed.  Mommy decided she should go as well.  She stumbles down the hall in a half asleep/half awake mode while Mouse Girl follows.  Mom hardly ever turns on the light in the middle of the night during one of these visits.  She opens the door to the bathroom and Mouse Girl walks into the room.  Then she heard SPLASH!

You *KNOW* this did not end well.  When mommy heard the SPLASH, she flipped on the light.  OMP (oh my pig!)  Mouse Girl was soaking wet and stuck in the toilet fussing.  Not hurt and nowhere near drowning but stuck and super soaked.  It was not a happy moment for her.  On one hand, mommy wanted to say thank you because it could have been her.  On the other hand, mommy wanted to laugh because that was one soaked kitty.  And then on the other foot, poor Mouse Girl.  Then, mom said those famous words, “Honey, you need to come in here.”

Daddy fussed and stumbled down the hallway.  I have to admit that he was semi-asleep up until the point he got to the bathroom and heard Mouse Girl meowing and fussing.  And then mom fussing at him about this is quote, “Why, we don’t leave the lid UP”.  Mommy finally got Mouse Girl out, bathed her a second time and dried her off.  All of this around 2:00AM.  Mouse Girl has been mad at daddy every since… with a good reason don’t you think?  Snorts.

Your parents ever do something like this with consequences?  Do tell.

 
51 Comments

Posted by on 08/04/2014 in Bacon, Hemi and Mouse Girl

 

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Bathroom Humor – PLOL (Pig Laughing Out Loud)

I tell you, I need to get a hobby or start writing that great America novel. I couldn’t sleep last night. Bashful had a sleep over and mom and dad went out on date night. So, I stayed up late on the computer surfing the net. Will I *ever* find the end of that internet? Snort – probably not.

I came across some really interesting information and pictures for that matter. Take this toilet for example. Wouldn’t that be the coolest thing to have in your bathroom? I would be in there constantly watching the little fishies swim around.

But it makes me wonder. When you flush, where do those little fishies go? See, I’m a curious pig like that. It has to be a dual tank so they don’t get flushed down the drain. I know the purr things here would be in there drooling and wanting to play with them.

Let me share some of the interesting tidbits that I learned. I know you want to know what they were 🙂

  • The ‘average’ person spends three entire years of their life sitting on the toilet. An average person will visit the toilet 2500 times a year, that’s about 6-8 times a day.
  • The film Psycho was the first movie to show a toilet flushing. The scene caused an impouring of complaints about the indecency.
  • The first toilet ever seen on television was on Leave it to Beaver.
  • Pomegranates studded with cloves were used as the first attempt in making a toilet air freshener.
  • Over $100,000 was spent on a study to determine whether most people put their toilet paper on the holder with the flap over or under. Most people put their flap over. I know we do here at the Hotel Thompson. You?
  • King George II of Great Britain died falling off of a toilet on October 25, 1760. Can you imagine that?
  • The first toilet cubicle in a row is the least used and consequently the cleanest.
  • The toilet is flushed more times during the Super Bowl halftime than at any time during the year.
  • While he didn’t invent the toilet, Thomas Crapper perfected the siphon flush system we use today. Snort – there was actually a guy named Crapper – stop it!
  • In 1890, the Scott Paper Company manufactured toilet paper on a roll, much as we know it today.
  • On an average day, we use 57 squares of toilet paper a day. Can you spare a square? There are 333 squares of toilet paper on the average roll. The standared size of a square is 4.5″ by 4.5″.
  • Most toilets flush in the key of E flat.
  • Did you know that there is actually a World Toilet Day? It takes place on November 19 every year. I’ll have to let Journalist Rocky the Squirrel know about that so he can do a post 🙂
  • 40,000 Americans are injured on toilets each year.
  • Do you know the different names for a toilet? loo, powder room, lavatory, outhouse (mom told be about those – OMP!), men’s room, dunny, women’s room, restroom, potty, cloakroom, latrine, water closet, john, little girls’ room, little boys’ room, throne, facilities? Do any of these ring a bell with you?

Hope you learned something new. I was totally fascinated with the information that I found. In fact, I printed this blog and put it in our bathroom. Why? Of course for bathroom reading – snort – HA! So this weekend, remember when you well when you – you know. 🙂

 
10 Comments

Posted by on 05/25/2013 in Bacon

 

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