I know Fridays. I live for them every week. Fridays mean that mommy will be home for the next couple of days. Fridays mean I get to stay up late and watch television with mom and dad. Fridays sometimes even mean popcorn while watching b-rated movies on the Sy-Fy channel.
But, I’ve never heard of this Black Friday. It has to be bad. I say this for a couple of reasons. First, when mommy told daddy he would have to “survive” this day, daddy stopped laughing. Heck, for a minute I thought he was going to cry. He kept saying, “But, but, but”. Mommy didn’t listen to him. Second of all, you know something is bad when mommy laughs like the wicked witch from the east. Ooh shivers just hearing that in my head.
So this Black Friday thing, what can it be? Is it dark as black outside all day and it’s a Friday this Black Friday? Is it a plague or disease? Did someone not pay the light bill? Is it the end of days? Should I start stock piling my piggy chow in my bedroom? I’ll admit that this little piggy was scared.
I did what I do best. I squealed, ran to my bedroom and slammed my door. I then immediately started doing some research on my laptop.
ODP (oh dear piggies). It’s worse than what I thought! Did you know that the day after Thanksgiving in the USA, they call it Black Friday? Here’s the scary part. People get up voluntarily at 0400 hours to camp outside of stores to go shopping!. Thud – piggy down! 0400 hours is like way before even Old McDonald gets up at the farm. It’s before the birds start chirping. It’s before they even make the doughnuts at the Krispy Kreme. Heck, it’s before *I* even stir in my toddler bed. That’s early!
Mommy is going to make daddy go shopping with her on Black Friday at 0400 hours. Two words mom. How uncivilized. I can’t believe mom is going to get up before the break of dawn. But friends, don’t feel too sorry for daddy. I saw him the garage laughing and getting “ready” for Black Friday. He was pulling out his old pads from his football days. I think I even saw him with a hockey stick and a helmet. Oohh mommy – who is punishing who now? Snorts.