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Jokes with Anipals

 
9 Comments

Posted by on 01/22/2017 in Bacon, Houdini

 

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Dear Bacon

20130601-002912.jpgDear Bacon,
I don’t get it. Everyone looks at me and laughs. I don’t understand why. Can you explain it to me? Signed Inca

Dear Inca,
I don’t know why they laugh at you. Maybe they’re jealous of the wonderful mustache look you have going on which I find fascinating. I think you look simply marvelous my friend. Don’t worry about those people that laugh. You keep on being a dapper little chap.

 

20130601-002926.jpgDear Bacon,
I read about you watching television all of the time. I love to watch my shows too – especially the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. They fascinate me for some reason. Do you like them? Signed Raffie

Dear Raffie,
I just can’t understand why you would like the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. . I mean really, they’re turtles. It blows my mind to figure that one out. And yes, I do like to watch the show as well my friend.

 

20130601-002941.jpgDear Bacon,
You know when you get tired, you get tired. The humans just parked the car and the hood was still warm. I was tired and cold. Put all of that together and boom I took a rest. Don’t hate. I was really comfortable. Signed Rose Bud

Dear Rose Bud,
I’m all with you. One can’t determine when one gets tired and cold. I’m all for it. But take this as some kind advice. Don’t let the humans catch you. They may not like it. Take care.

 

20130601-003004.jpgDear Bacon,
I am a world winner on table tennis. It looks really hard but once you get the hang if it, it really is fun. Are you up for a challenge? Signed Darwin

Dear Darwin,

WOW – you got a mean left swing there my friend. I don’t think I could possibly do as well as you. I’m not a very coordinated pig. You are the man!

 

20130617-211412.jpgDear Bacon,

Do you have that one favorite stuffed animal that you just *have* to sleep with at night? This is teddy and he is my stuffed animal. He always goes everywhere I do. Do you have one? Signed Cutsey

Dear Cutsey,

Aren’t you just adorable with your little friend. Yes, I do have one as well. I think we all do at some point in our lives. Mine is a little stuffed black pig. He’s so quishy. I call him Mini Me. I carry him throughout the house. Mommy has an old Mickey Mouse doll that used to travel with her. She has since retired him but he is still at the house. Happy sleeps my friend!

 

Remember Friends – Keep sending your pictures/questions to me at Baconthompson@gmail.com

 
8 Comments

Posted by on 07/09/2013 in Dear Bacon

 

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Never Again Will I Enter the Unknown

 

There’s one room in the entire house that is off limits to this spoiled little pig.  It’s mom and dads office/work out room.  They say there’s too many things in there that I can get into – I don’t know what they mean by that – looks around innocently.

This weekend, the door was slightly ajar.  I looked in the kitchen and there was no mommy.  I could hear dad in the shower singing.  I looked down the hall and the purr things were asleep in the bedroom.  I thought what the heck and pushed the door with my snout.  I didn’t go in at that time.  I just opened the door.  Nothing wrong with that, right.

There was a huge machine against one wall.  It had long arms on both sides, was black and looked like there some kind of walking rubber thing on the bottom.  Dad says during the week when he comes in this room he rides the beast.  He comes out all sweaty.  This has to be the machine that dad calls the beast.  It didn’t look too scary to me… just big.  I wasn’t interested in that… it involves sweat, huffing and puffing.  Not my kind of idea of a good time.  But still I didn’t go into the forbidden zone. 

I looked to the right and got a little startled.  There was a giant Mickey Mouse standing there looking at me – I thought I had gotten caught until I realized that it was a big stuffed animal.  Nice though, I liked it’s big yellow shoes.  I could have fun playing with that.  It made like 4 times little ole me.  But still I didn’t go into the forbidden zone.

I saw a floor fan.  Seen those before.  Nothing interesting there.

I saw a bag full of books.  Seen those before.  Nothing interesting there unless deviled Bacon comes out in a destructive mood and wants to do a little confetti shredding.  Not interested in that today.

Then, I saw it.  OMP!  (Oh my pig!).  I whimpered, snorted, crackled like a rooster and told my little legs not to fail me now.  I ran as fast as I could to my bedroom and jumped in my little crate.  That’s where my mommy found me shaking when she came in from outside. 

It was a scary thing I saw in that forbidden room.  I will *never* venture or peek in there again.  In fact, I think when I past that door, I may walk a little faster.  Shivers – the thoughts of what could happen.  Dad might get a wild hair up his bum and do that to me!  I better be extra good to him for a while.  Oh, you’re asking what do you see?

20130218-125335.jpg

Scary isn’t it? 

I guess that was the one fish that didn’t get away.

I guess dad was the Fish Whisperer that day.

I guess he didn’t exaggerate on the size of this one.

I guess this Fish Tail was true.

I guess this Fish trembled at the sound of dad’s name. 

 

I guess he was right when he says good things come to those who bait. 

I guess he can give up his books Hooked on Fishing and Fishing for Dummies.  

I guess that solves the problem of To Fish or Not To Fish – that is the question.

Okay – snort – enough fish one liners – hope you enjoyed them 🙂

 

 
8 Comments

Posted by on 02/25/2013 in Uncategorized

 

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