There you go. That elf needs to be stopped NOW… like yesterday. He is evil pure and simple. I woke up this morning all bright eyed and bushy tailed. I stretched my hooves, yawned and tooted. What? You don’t do that in the mornings? I then rolled over to look at my picture of Miss Piggy on my night stand and got the shock of my little piggy life. My Miss Piggy picture was gone and in it’s place was this hideous, nightmarish joke from Don Juan. I squealed so loudly that I think Nana heard me all the way up the street. The nerve of this so called elf for Santa. I’m writing the head elf of the Union. This can’t go on anymore. Shivers and looks in every corner of my bedroom.
There I was minding my own business and doing my constitutional when I look over. OMP heavens! I squealed and had absolutely *no* problems making water then. Who in their right mind drives around with this as their companion? Can you tell me that my friends? I mean heck I’m all for getting to ride in the carpool lane but this is ridiculous. To say I squealed is an understatement. I do believe people from the next state over *might* have heard me. And hey, I’m big enough to admit it scared me. Wouldn’t it you? Come on admit it my friends. You would have screamed too… right?
Squeals with puppy delight! Guess what. I bet you will never guess. Guess. Can you believe this – pirate chicken three is here! Barks with puppy laughter and runs around the room. YES pirate chicken! And look, he even left me a message. And you know what is amazing? He sounds like daddy – who knew!! ♥ Houdini
P.S. I want you to know that mom just loves that chicken squeak. After playing it with almost an hour, mom looked at daddy and said, “Who’s idea was this?”
Oh my friends. Where does the time fly by so quickly? Can you believe it’s been FOUR years since my first posting on October 9, 2011? One of my biggest accomplishments in this time – is meeting all of you my wonderful and cherished blogville friends from all over the world! Your friendship means the world to this little oinker – it really does! And what a great thing that my blog anniversary comes in my favorite month – during my 31 Days of Spook.
So I know this post isn’t about hauntings or spooks, things that go bump in the night or squeals, but is about you – my friends. Thank YOU for all of your support, your friendship, your shoulders when I need them to cry on and for allowing me into your homes. YOU mean the world to this little piggy. Smooches!
Oh friends. I’m not sure if your post office is like our post office but you gotta enjoy a great hide and seek game. Oh wait a minute, you don’t know the whole story of The Great Post Office Drama – snorts. Pull up a chair, get you a drink and some popcorn. This is the mystery.
Okay here it goes. Last Friday, there was a knock on the front door of the Hotel Thompson. Before dad could answer it – which trust me was only moments – the mail person jumped in their truck and went on down the street. What? Was that a run by post office… a run by knocking… a test to see if anyone was home? Was there a video camera somewhere with people going to jump out to say “Gotcha”? I mean it was that quick. Later on when mom came home, she found a piece of paper in the mailbox saying they tried to deliver a package. Yeah, okay. On the notice, it said who it was from so mom told me and I got so excited I squealed. The notice said you could come the next morning, Saturday, to the post office and pick it up.
So all night long, I waited. I tossed and turned. All in anticipation of what the package contained. Saturday morning, I got mom up early and her/dad went to the post office. Now, our post office for our neighborhood is like 10 miles away which is really odd because we have a post office like 3 miles away. But that is post office guidelines for you. Mom/dad get to the post office and guess what. It’s closed. Locked down. No one home. Nada. What the heck? Mom looks at her notice again. Yep, she’s at the right place. How’s that for service, huh?
So mom/dad go back home. Later on in the day, mom just happens to see the postman or should I call her postwoman. She runs out to meet her waving the slip of paper in her hand. Mom in so many nice words tells her about how it was ‘attempted to be delivered’ and fusses. Of course the carrier apologizes and doesn’t have the package today. Mom then tells her she even went to the post office on the slip she left and guess what – they were closed! The carrier took the slip and said she would have the substitute deliver it Monday. Great. My package will have to wait until Monday. Drats. Stomps hooves. Has a hissy fit. I don’t wanna wait. I want it NOW.
So here we are – Post Office 2 and Me -0-. Monday comes around finally and mom just happens to get off early due to a meeting. She gets home just in time for the mailman thinking she will have my package. Guess what – no package. He knows nothing about it. This pig can only take so much my friends. I beg mommy – please go find my package. We all know it’s out there somewhere…. probably in package purgatory begging to come home to me. I can almost hear it now – “Find me Bacon”.
So mom/dad jump in the Jeep and go to our post office. All the way daddy is telling mommy that package is gone like the wind never to be seen again in these parts of the South. But mom, she has the patience of a saint. She goes into the post office and explains the dilemma. What do they say? “You are at the wrong post office. You have to go to this post office”. Which might I add is a bit further. When mom says the paper said this one. Are you ready for it….. the post person laughed and said, “Oh, those are old papers. We changed a while back.”
So mom goes out to the Jeep and hears daddy say it again, “Bye-Bye package”. Of course by this time mom is determined she will track my package down. She goes to the second post office and of course, they can’t find it either. What is this, the great treasure hunt of the south? She asks for a supervisor, explains the situation and do you know what they told mommy? When mommy told them about ringing the door bell and then promptly leaving, they said that the carrier will only wait a second or two. WTH? This almost made mom lose her mommy mind. That’s hardly enough time to get off of the sofa. Then the supervisor went on their great hunt and find mission. And guess what? They couldn’t find it either! Talk about your customer service and don’t get mom started on the attitude everyone was having with their attitudes like mom was just plain crazy.
Now mom is getting a little upset and puts on a thick southern charm. She asks to speak to the head person in charge. He comes to the desk and she explains the entire situation again of course this times she is keeping her calm but oozing her forceful southern stand. They then go on a hunt and find mission. And guess what? They come back with the package! It was on the supervisors desk of all places. OMP – happy dance – happy dance. Mom takes the package, squeals in the post office, says thank you and goes out to the Jeep… just waiting for dad’s response. He’s in shock.
They come home and give me the package! Now you are probably asking, “Bacon, who is the package from?!” I’m glad you asked my friends. It was from my brother Easy across the pond. What a brother and pal he is. He sent me this package for my birthday. And let me tell you something. Easy you are the best! We loved it! My mom/dad laughed so hard when they opened the package. We loved everything. Thanks brother!!
Look at these goodies – squeals with piggy delight. Now the pink pig is a bank. That way I can save some of my allowance for my future trips here/there in the world. I even let mommy put STAR (that’s his name) on the new book shelf in the living room. That way we can make sure he doesn’t wonder off and get hurt.
And then there is Pee and Pool. Oh.my.piggy.heavens. Can you belief that? I ❤ them! We have all laughed and laughed over them. Pee and Poo. You want to take a better look don’t you? Are they not the funniest duo you have seen in sometime? You just gotta love them. Heck mommy even picked them up and hugged them – now *that* was funny! Oh brother – thank you so very much for thinking of me. I love everything!! ❤ Bacon
I’ve been telling you my friends that my human dad is off his knocker. I don’t care where he goes, he *always* gets into trouble. You gotta believe me. He is NUTS! I’ll tell you two examples from this past weekend – then you will believe me.
First Example –
Dad and mom went for Chinese food Saturday night. They went to their regular place where they know the staff. Of course during dinner, dad is picking on the waitress and they are laughing up a storm. Towards the end of the meal, the waitress thought daddy was done with his plate and went to get it. Daddy turned around to her and did a Kung Fu fighter stance. THUD! The waitress started laughing so hard that people on the other side of the restaurant turned to look to find out what was taking place. That’s my daddy – nods head.
Second Example –
This same night at the Chinese restaurant, the waitress asked daddy if he wanted anything else. He told her no because he was dancing tonight. Shakes piggy head. Does this man EVER stop? He told the waitress that his stage name was Stretchmarks. Just so you know – I looked him up on line. Here’s a picture of him performing – (oh and daddy – who’s the funny one now? Snorts)
I have to start by saying I’m coming out of hibernation. See my fur. It’s coming off. I’m shedding. I do that. Then we are *all* under stress here at the Hotel Thompson. This is a picture from last week. We still had carpet… then. 🙂 That’s all I’m saying about that. Tomorrow is a big day here. I can’t tell you anymore than that – well except it’s almost over.
I can tell you though that last week I might have cornered a worker here at the Hotel Thompson. Might is a pretty strong word. See, who would have known that a strong, tall guy could be afraid of a little oinker. He was working in the kitchen. I thought I would check on him and walked up behind him and oinked. You know he jumped pretty high – I was amazed. So there I was having a conversation with him and oinking. He squealed pretty high too. Then mom came in holding the little guy Houdini and was trying to wrestle me out of the kitchen. I was just trying to help… really I was. Raise your hand if you believe me. I see you – thank you. Stupid worker.
Score for me! The Easter bun-bun didn’t forget about my love for peeps. The Easter bun-bun brought me not necessarily a “Peep” product but something similar and look at it – it’s shaped like something I know but I can’t put my snout on it – snorts and rolls with piggy laughter.
It’s a piggy vanilla marshmallow like peep thing. I was so thrilled to have found it in the bottom of my big bucket. And trust me my friends. It was delicious! Of course, I ate it’s head off first. What? Mom was holding his feet – snorts.
And yes – I ate the whole thing. Daddy couldn’t understand why I was running around the Hotel Thompson afterwards. Maybe it was all of that sugar sweet daddy of mine. Snorts – thankfully there wasn’t anyone else here when I devoured my little friend. Have you ever seen anything so cute? Squeals!
I hate Don Juan. There you go. That elf needs to be stopped NOW… like yesterday. He is evil pure and simple. I woke up this morning all bright eyed and bushy tailed. I stretched my hooves, yawned and tooted. What? You don’t do that in the mornings? I then rolled over to look at my picture of Miss Piggy on my night stand and got the shock of my little piggy life. My Miss Piggy picture was gone and in it’s place was this hideous, nightmarish joke from Don Juan. I squealed so loudly that I think Nana heard me all the way up the street. The nerve of this so called elf for Santa. I’m writing the head elf of the Union. This can’t go on anymore. Shivers and looks in every corner of my bedroom.
Yep – I said that and you read correctly – Men Twerking. I know my buddy Fozzie is going to laugh when she sees this sign that me and mom saw in our adventures. Someone added a few letters and now men are twerking – snorticles and rolls around laughing. I wonder if the guys knew why people were pointing and laughing at them as they drove by? Maybe that explains why some of their pants were so low you could see sunset crack? Maybe – just maybe – the guys were the ones that did this to the sign. No Fozzie – it wasn’t me honestly. Looks innocently around. Really I was in the back of Albert, mom’s Smart car. I wouldn’t do that. Snorts and squeals.
Miniature pot bellied pig and friends - Bacon, Houdini, Hemi and all of the Rock Clan with Journalist Rocky the Squirrel all out looking for adventures from the Hotel Thompson.
first posting on October 9, 2011? One of my biggest accomplishments in this time – is meeting all of you my wonderful and cherished blogville friends from all over the world! Your friendship means the world to this little oinker – it really does! And what a great thing that my blog anniversary comes in my favorite month – during my 31 Days of Spook.
Oh friends. I’m not sure if your post office is like our post office but you gotta enjoy a great hide and seek game. Oh wait a minute, you don’t know the whole story of The Great Post Office Drama – snorts. Pull up a chair, get you a drink and some popcorn. This is the mystery.
So mom/dad jump in the Jeep and go to our post office. All the way daddy is telling mommy that package is gone like the wind never to be seen again in these parts of the South. But mom, she has the patience of a saint. She goes into the post office and explains the dilemma. What do they say? “You are at the wrong post office. You have to go to this post office”. Which might I add is a bit further. When mom says the paper said this one. Are you ready for it….. the post person laughed and said, “Oh, those are old papers. We changed a while back.”
They couldn’t find it either! Talk about your customer service and don’t get mom started on the attitude everyone was having with their attitudes like mom was just plain crazy.
brother!!
Score for me! The Easter bun-bun didn’t forget about my love for peeps. The Easter bun-bun brought me not necessarily a “Peep” product but something similar and look at it – it’s shaped like something I know but I can’t put my snout on it – snorts and rolls with piggy laughter.
Piglove 