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Paw Time with Houdini

Sometimes one just needs to steal a jacket and get comfy for a nap.  Mom was working.  I wanted to play but I was sleepy.  So I stole her jacket and settled down for some shut eye.  Hey, a dog has to do what a dog has to do in these times, right?  And can you tell I need a trim as mom calls it?  Sure mom – go ahead and call my groomer.  I *need* a day at the spa.  It’s hard being a dog sometimes…barks with puppy laughter.  Bring on some TLC, massages and smelly oatmeal bath.  Calgon take me away!

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Dear Bacon

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Dear Bacon – Listen the water is fine my four legged pot bellied piggy.  Why don’t you come for a swim with me.  I’ll even teach you how to swim under the water.  I’m sure you will catch on fast.  What do you think?  Signed Mr. Friendly

Dear Mr. Friendly – Not that I don’t appreciate your well… friendness but I think I’ll pass.  For some reason, I think it’s better for this little oinker to stay on dry land, far away from the water and far, far away from your swimming lessons. Call it a premonition if you will.

But, carry on my friend and thank you… really.


20140330-183825.jpgDear Bacon – The nerve of our family vet.  Can you believe that (A) they had the nerve to come near my captains quarters with that proby thing and (B) they told my humans that *I* needed to go on a DIET?!  What in the world was he thinking?  Don’t my humans pay for his sound advice?  What kind of crap advice is this?  I think the look on my face tells you everything I think.  Signed Tiny

Dear Tiny – Oh dear.  That proby thing is awful.  It must be a torture device from centuries long ago.  Yep, that’s what I think.  And that look on your face.  Oh my.  You are certainly not happy.  And well… looks down at my pot belly.  I am one NOT to give any advice to you on that four lettered dirty word – D.I.E.T.  Shakes head – nope.

Not the one to do that at all my friend.


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Dear Bacon – I see you – purr snicker.  I have my eyes on your activities good or bad.  I’m reporting back to that Evil Elf of yours Don Juan.  You just wait.  You’re going to get it when he comes out in November.  Signed The Watcher

Dear The Watcher – Really?!  It’s not bad enough that I have rogue elf that watches my every move, you’re going to as well?  Rolls piggy eyes and walks away.  This is so not fair in this oinker’s life.  Can’t we all just get along?  Snorts


20140330-183847.jpgDear Bacon – I hate it when I get into trouble here at my casa.  Can you believe that my humans make me face the couch and sit here in time out?  It’s so humiliating.  Signed Unhappy Pooch

Dear Unhappy Pooch – WOW my friend.  That is some look you have there facing your tomb of doom.  It’s just not right.  And to put you in this time out right in the middle of the living room where you can hear and see all of the fun activities going on around you.  Shakes piggy head and clicks tongue.  Nope, just not right.  I’m sorry pal.  Maybe when you come out of serving your time, you just ignore those humans.  Show them who is getting timeout there.  Don’t give them any affection.

None whatsoever… can you last like what five seconds?  Hang in there my bud!


Dear Bacon – 20140330-183858.jpgI double kitty dare you to try this maneuver.  Heck, I triple meow dare you.  I dare you to put your back legs up over your head.  In fact if you can do this position, I will personally come over every day and give you a piggy massage – heck I’ll even clean up your room for you.  Signed Fear Factor Feline

Dear Fear Factor Feline – Really?!  That’s okay my furry friend.  That’s what I have my mommy for – massages and cleaning – snorts.  Let’s hope that cannon of yours doesn’t go off while you are bent legs over head.

 
13 Comments

Posted by on 06/19/2018 in Bacon, Dear Bacon

 

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Tired Bacon – Sleeping Bacon

Last night I played hard.  I mean really, REALLY hard.  After dinner, I ran through the Hotel Thompson like it was on fire!  Up and down the halls, through my room, the frontroom and even the kitchen.  I was running so hard that I was leaving skid marks and running into walls.  It happens at times.  I had to flex my piggy muscles and run like the wind.

Afterwards, I pulled my king size Egyptian blankie to the front room, in front of the couch where mom was and stretched out on it.  I had to be near mom because you know that way she could pet me and scratch my back.  It makes me feel good to know that she is close.

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Mom was laughing at me running through the front room like a cannon ball.  When I tell you it tired me out – I’m not lying!  I think I stayed there on my special sheet for over an hour.  Of course, it didn’t hurt that mom was loving on me 🙂

Can you tell that I was tired from this last picture?  The look in my eyes should tell you everything – I was bushed!  I didn’t even stay up long enough to hear my bedtime story from mom.  That’s tired!

 
21 Comments

Posted by on 06/16/2018 in Bacon

 

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Dear Bacon

20130531-230700.jpgDear Bacon – Summer really stinks.  It’s totally hot and uncomfortable.  All I can do is stand in front of the fan and let the breeze overtake me.  I just have to do something to cool me down.  Signed Flappy

Dear Flappy – Hey pal, whatever you need to do to keep you cool I say go for it!  Momma is a firm believer in her fan in this hot summer.  Can’t we just skip over that season?  I’m all for it.  Let’s start a petition.  What do you think?


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Dear Bacon – Hubba hubba little man.  I find you so fascinating.  I can’t believe a pig like you is still single.  What do you say we fix that problem?  Signed I Do

Dear I Do Don’t – Not that I’m totally not appreciative or anything but I’m just not ready to settle down like that.  You’re totally beautiful and I think you will find the perfect pig one day.  Don’t give up my friend.


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Dear Bacon – You talk about Houdini at the Hotel Thompson a lot of different times.  I just want you to know that I think I’m more spoiled than he is.  My humans actually dresses me too.  It’s a pain in the rump area but hey it makes them laugh.  You ever think about dressing up?  Signed Prissy

Dear Prissy – First off – you look adorable in your little outfit.  Your face doesn’t *look* like you’re enjoying it but hey if the humans are happy, right?  Second off – I can be a fussy little character.  I’m not too proud to say that.  I just don’t see me as a ‘dress’ up kind of guy.  Buy hey if the mom wanted too, I would let her.  Like you said, it makes the humans happy and smile.  That’s our jobs!


Dear Bacon – 20130531-230749.jpgHave you ever heard of the Red Hat Society?  I’m a member and they have monthly meetings.  I think you need to look it up in your area and do a posting on it.  I think it would be fascinating.  Signed  Fun Times

Dear Fun Times – I’ll do that!  I’ve heard mom talk about it with her friends.  There’s also purple hats, right?  🙂 See, I do pay attention even though sometimes mom doesn’t think so.  You wear that hat with pride and look forward to a posting in the future my friend.

 
14 Comments

Posted by on 06/12/2018 in Bacon, Dear Bacon

 

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Bashful Hide and Seek

Bashful – he’s a good pebble.  He tries to stay out of trouble.  Sometimes it works – sometimes not so much.  Last night, we were playing hide and seek in the house.  I can’t tell you how many times I walked by the table and saw this napkin.  It never dawned on me one single time that the little fella would be underneath it sleeping.

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The only thing that *finally* gave him away was that he had to go to the potty.  If it wasn’t for that, he would still be under the napkin on the table hiding.  And mom/dad, they weren’t much help.  I think dad was actually the one that suggested that great hiding place.  Where’s dad when *I* want to hide, huh?  Perhaps I should hide dad’s remote control and see how he likes to hunt for things for hours at a time – snorts.

Just another fun night at the Hotel Thompson.  How was your night?

 

 
9 Comments

Posted by on 06/07/2018 in Bacon

 

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Dear Bacon

Dear Bacon – What’s happening pig?  So like here is the problem dude.  I think like I’m a happening cat.  I got the moves like Jagger.  I wear my hoodie.  My parents still want to treat me like a kitty – what’s up with that? Signed Rap Cat

Dear Rap Cat – Slow your roll purr thing.  You are still a babe.  You’re not a member of the group Stray Cats.

I’m not sure if you been told this but you are pussy cat, not a rap cat.  I hate to be the bearer of the bad news.

Quit trying to go all jive in front of your parents.  Save the rap when they go to bed at night.  I bet they would love to hear that in the middle of the night.


Dear Bacon – I have a small problem.  As  you can see, my parents think I’m their personal marshmallow holder.  I can’t help that my fur is thorny.  What am I to do? – Signed Thorny

Dear Thorny – Give me a minute to pick myself up from off the floor.  I’m sorry dude.  That’s the funniest picture I’ve seen in some time.  You’re parents are really original.  I know it may seem like a pain in your side – HA – but go with it.  They can rent you out to parties and such – you can make money and save for your retirement.  I say go with it and make the best out of it little guy.


Dear Bacon – Finally I have proof with this picture!  When I get in trouble, my parents put me in a corner and point their fingers at me.  What’s a kitty to do? Signed – Hands Up in the Air

Dear Hands Up in the Air – Take your hands down from the air.  Use those paws that you have and swat those fingers.  They won’t be putting baby in the corner anymore.


 

Dear Bacon – I’ve read your blogs.  You talk about bed head.  Come on pig – look at this picture.  I think I have you down on bed head.  Signed – Bed Head Extraordinaire

Dear Bed Head – You got me.  Now please go shower and fix yourself up.  You’re scaring the viewers.

 
15 Comments

Posted by on 06/05/2018 in Bacon, Dear Bacon

 

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Dear Bacon

 

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Dear Bacon – I’ve been hiding most of the day from my brother.  I ate his breakfast.  There I admit it.  I ate his breakfast.  So what.  He snoozed and he lost.  Now though, I feel like he’s been stalking me all day.  Every time I turn around, I can feel him watching me.  He’s watching me right now isn’t he?  Signed Big Trouble

Dear Big Trouble – Oh my friend.  There are just certain things in life that we don’t do.  Eating your brother’s food is one of them.  There will be something to pay for this.  You might as well just push your bowl of kibbles his way tonight to make up for it.  Trust me, with the evil look he is giving you, it might be the right move.


 20131208-205614.jpgDear Bacon – There’s a standing rule in this house whether your are anipal or human, when one is sleeping you do not wake them.  I have to go wizzle.  I’ve had this strange feeling for a LONG time.  But, as you can see kitty is sleeping on me.  If I move, she will wake.  If I wake her, she will be in a bad mood.  So I wait with this pained look on my face.  Signed Helpless.

Dear Signed Helpless – I know the feeling my friend.  Well personally I don’t know the feeling but my mom knows the feeling.  She has been in your position numerous times with one of us in her arms.  Just keep your head up and those legs tight.


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Dear Bacon – Who says that humans can be the only ones with teddy bears.  Here is mine.  He’s my buddy.  We go every where together.  We are playing patty cakes here in the picture.  He’s slow in catching the patterns but he will learn.  Signed Bear Times Two

Dear Bear Times Two – Hey my friend.  Nobody can say anything bad about this.  It’s totally cute!  You always have a friend with you.  Keep teaching him the patty cake song – he might just catch on soon.  Did you see the movie Ted?  It could happen!

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Dear Bacon – What?  It was Curious George and I am Curious too.  I want to know what made George so Curious.  He was totally full of fluff – I knew it.  Nothing between those ears but white fluff.  Guess he won’t be curious much longer huh?  Signed Curious Too

Dear Curious Too – Now the world knows.  White fluff is what put Curious George together.  Hilarious.  Looks like he might need some reconstruction surgery there.  Does your house have a BooBoo Facility like here at the Hotel Thompson?  If so, get him in surgery STAT.


  Dear Bacon – Am I the only dog that has a snake for a sister? I mean, I know we both have the same body type but this doesn’t seem natural to me.  I don’t think we look alike at all.  I’m so confused and a little scared.  Signed Confused Dog Brother to a Snake

Dear Confused Dog Brother to a Snake – WOW!  First off, we need to talk about you my friend.  Wipe that scared look right off of your face.  Dude up right now.  You are a MAN doggy.  Ssnnaakkee – is a girl.  You need to set up your area – start marking your territory.  Don’t let her know that you are scared of her… because personally I would be too but we are men anipals.  Show no fear.  Then work your sister to your advantage.  Treat her as such.  Most men take care of their sisters.  And in turn, they take care of YOU.  Who in the neighborhood is going to mess with YOU now?  If they do, bring your sister along.  I can assure you, you will be king of your hood.  Now, off you go to make nice with your ssiisstteerr.  Let me know how things work out for you okay.

.


REMEMBER my friends – these weekly Dear Bacon issues can’t happen without YOU.  Please email me your letters and pictures – thanks!  ❤

 
18 Comments

Posted by on 05/29/2018 in Bacon, Dear Bacon

 

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