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Ask a Stupid Question Day

  Journalist Rocky the Squirrel here –

Keeping my paws on the nuts of the world!

 .

Today, September 28th is an awesome day.  It’s Ask a Stupid Question Day.  Finally a day that we can ask all of those silly questions and not have anyone look at us a strange way.  Speak up my followers – ask all of those questions you were afraid to ask today that you have been wondering about all year long.

 I interviewed the occupants here at the Hotel Thompson.  They came up with some great questions that I’m going to share.  They’ll start so you can feel better about your questions.  Remember no one is going to laugh at your question – maybe the answer but not the question – chitter chatter

“Why is Grape Nuts cereal called Grape Nuts when it has neither grapes or nuts?”

“If the Professor on Gilligan’s Island could make a radio out of a coconut, why couldn’t he fix a small hole in the side of the boat?”

“Why does Goofy always stand up on two legs yet Pluto remains on all four legs?  Aren’t they both dogs?”

“Why do banks leave their doors wide open but chain their pens to the counter?”

“How come when the battery goes dead on the television remote, you think it will work if you press the buttons harder?”

“If a cat always lands on its feet and buttered bread always lands butter side down, what would happen if you tied buttered bread on top of the cat?”

“What color would a Smurf turn if you choked it?”

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Dear Bacon

Dear Bacon – I overheard my dad telling mom last night that he was going camping this weekend.  I love camping.  There’s just something about the woods with all of those trees and marking my territory.  I get excited just thinking about it – oops I almost wet myself.  Anyway, I wanted to be ready when my dad got up this morning.  Do you think I’m dressed appropriately for the woods?  Signed Camper in Training

Dear Camper in Training – Oh my friend.  I think you will have  a blast in the woods with all of those trees.  And look at you!  I think you are more than appropriate.  You look like you belong in the woods making trails.  Yes you do.  I hope you have a blast and one thing.  Be careful of the sticks on the ground that wiggle.


Dear Bacon – This  has been a huge day for me!  First I met my new parents who seem pretty cool to tell you the truth.  Then they took me to this awesome store where they had everything… and I do mean everything!  They bought me food and treats and even fitted me for a cute little jacket in case it gets cold outside.  I didn’t think it fit too good in my arms but my humans said that I would grow into it.  Have you ever been to this store that has everything?  Signed Barks and Cuddles

Dear Barks and Cuddles – Look at you!!  Squeals with cuteness.  Never fear, you will grow into your little jacket.  And hey that jacket looks adorable on you.  I just love seeing your little tail peeking out below the bottom – too cute!  And this store you speak of, yes we have one close by the Hotel Thompson.  Mom/dad have taken me in the past as well as Houdini. It has everything that any anipal can imagine.  It’s such a fun place to explore for sure.  Now you take care of yourself little guy and keep us posted on your growing rate.


Dear Bacon – It’s a hard job keeping one’s self in kibbles and treats.  You see I’m a fashion pup model.  I advertise a lot of times for doggy products.  On this date, I was pushing shampoo products as well as supporting dogs who bathe.  Can you believe that there are dogs out there that never take a bath?  The horror in that!  I just can’t imagine not taking care of one’s personal hygiene.  So, I have to ask my friend.  What kind of shampoo do you use?  Signed Pup Model

Dear Pup Model – Now that is a career!  Look at you my friend.  You do have the legs to be an awesome model for sure.  I use a shampoo made specifically for farm anipals.  I know it doesn’t sound wonderful but it’s awesome on my piggy Mohawk and keeps my bristles less irritating to mom’s bare skin around her ankles.  What we do for our humans, right?  You keep on being the star you are sweet friend.  Happy Bubble Bath!


Dear Bacon – I think I’ve made a grave mistake.  You see my dad was taking some medicine and dropped a pill.  I thought it was cool to play with the pill but accidentally swallowed it.  I then saw this snake on the floor and have been holding it for hours watching it to make sure it doesn’t get loose in the hacienda.  The things we do to protect our humans.  Who knows how long this snake has been wiggling around here.  It could have bit someone!  Signed Snake Watcher

Dear Snake Watcher – Oh no my friend!  You might want to not swallow any more pills in the future.  Hopefully this pill will wear off really soon.  I’m not sure what it was – hopefully nothing too much harmful than what it already is.  I mean, catching live snakes in your house – that pill had to be something wicked.  You might just want to go chill for a while.  Perhaps take a nap and it’s okay to let that snake go.  I bet you won’t even find that snake when you wake up.  It’s okay – you’re safe.  Not walk away from the snake and sleep my friend.


Dear Bacon – I don’t get it.  It was raining outside so my dad put my raincoat on before I went outside.  My raincoat is new and I love it because nothing on me gets wet – you can’t see my rain boots underneath it.  Well me and dad are walking outside and people keep looking, pointing and laughing.  I don’t get it.  What’s so funny?  Signed Sluggo

Dear Sluggo – First up, tell me that’s not your name.  Really? Second up, I don’t think they are laughing or pointing at you.  Nope.  No way.  You are way too cute my friend.  I think they are looking, pointing and laughing at your human.  Humans are weird like that.  You just keep on walking and don’t mind them at all.  Just be careful of salt on the streets okay.


❤ Don’t forget my friends to keep emailing me your letters/pictures coming for Dear Bacon submissions.  Dear Bacon can’t happen without YOU! ❤

 
15 Comments

Posted by on 04/04/2017 in Bacon, Dear Bacon

 

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Image

Jokes with Anipals

 
7 Comments

Posted by on 01/15/2017 in Bacon

 

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Ask a Stupid Question Day

 

 Journalist Rocky the Squirrel here –

Keeping my paws on the nuts of the world!

 .

Today, September 28th, is an awesome day.  It’s Ask a Stupid Question Day.  Finally a day that we can ask all of those silly questions and not have anyone look at us a strange way.  Speak up my followers – ask all of those questions you were afraid to ask today that you have been wondering about all year long.

 I interviewed the occupants here at the Hotel Thompson.  They came up with some great questions that I’m going to share.  They’ll start so you can feel better about your questions.  Remember no one is going to laugh at your question – maybe the answer but not the question – chitter chatter

“Why is Grape Nuts cereal called Grape Nuts when it has neither grapes or nuts?”

“If the Professor on Gilligan’s Island could make a radio out of a coconut, why couldn’t he fix a small hole in the side of the boat?”

“Why does Goofy always stand up on two legs yet Pluto remains on all four legs?  Aren’t they both dogs?”

“Why do banks leave their doors wide open but chain their pens to the counter?”

“How come when the battery goes dead on the television remote, you think it will work if you press the buttons harder?”

“If a cat always lands on its feet and buttered bread always lands butter side down, what would happen if you tied buttered bread on top of the cat?”

“What color would a Smurf turn if you choked it?”

 
 

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Tootsie Roll Pops

Do you remember the commercial for Tootsie Roll Pops back in the day.  You know the one with, “How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie roll pop?”  And then the owl licks and counts, “One, Two, and then crunch – three.”  Snorts with piggy laughter.  That commercial kills me.  I wasn’t born when it originally came out but the other night here at the Hotel Thompson we were watching old commercials.  It was great – some of them were hilarious.

But it got me, mom and dad talking.  What were some of your favorite flavors of the Tootsie Roll Pop?  But better yet, what flavor would you have loved to have had for a Tootsie Roll Pop?  Mom and dad came up with:  Pineapple, butter pecan and coconut.  What do you think about those flavors?

Tell me my friends.  What flavors would you have loved to have seen and had?

 

 
15 Comments

Posted by on 08/12/2016 in Bacon

 

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I Found the Answer

There I was minding my own business surfing the night to find the answers to all the questions.  That’s when I saw this picture.  There you go my friends.  That’s the answer.  What?  You don’t know what I’m talking about?  Okay think about it.  Go back in time when you were in school and you had that math class that asked the answer.  If Juan had watermelons, how many could he fit in the car.  Snorts with piggy laughter.  Now you get it?

 
21 Comments

Posted by on 07/31/2016 in Bacon

 

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Dear Bacon

 Dear Bacon – Who says that humans get to have all of the fun?  Us anipals can appreciate a good movie too.  For instance, one of the best movies ever made – can you guess it?  Star Wars of course!  I mean come on piggy – don’t you love it?  The lights, the action, the fights, marrying Hans Solo – what is there not to like?!  What do you think about the movie?  And what is your favorite movie.  You can tell me.  Signed Princess Leia Kitty

Dear Princess Leia Kitty – Well I can see my friend from your outfit that you really, REALLY like to get into your character and enjoy your movies.  I’m piggy enough to admit that I’ve never watched any of the Star Wars movies.  Now before you hiss too loudly, remember I’m only 4.5.  My dad hasn’t introduced me yet.  But I can guarantee you that after I read him your letter, he will.  Lucky me.

My favorite movie?  Of course Charlotte’s Web.  What’s not to like?  Snorts and oinks!


 Dear Bacon – I know you have a pesky cat at the Hotel Thompson.  I have one here too.  Shaking my head.  Why are cats so evil?  They say their misunderstood.  Barks – as if.  They have the humans completed snowed – completely!  Us anipals know the truth.  You see, our humans were at work.  The pesky fur ball got onto the coffee table, looked at me and started to push the bowl of flowers towards the end of the table.  I was like NO! – but of course why listen to me – I’m just the dog as he puts it.  As he knocked the bowl off the table, I couldn’t help it with my expression and of course the turd took my picture.  Guess who got blamed for it?  Yep, moi.  Because we all know the cute little kitty would never do such a thing.  Help me my friend.  Signed OMD!

Dear OMD! – That pesky no good for nothing flea bag!  Yes I understand your situation completely.  Hemi here thinks he is the master and does things very similar.  Like smacking me hard on the fanny when no one is looking and when I try to take a nip at him squealing to the high heavens.  Heck, I wasn’t going to eat him – I was cleaning him… yeah that’s the story.  So you see, I know your pain.  I think perhaps your little friend should have some payback.  Call me – I’m sure we can come up with something like honey or peanut butter accidentally of course being left out for him to be covered in… or maybe a swift bath in the toilet.  What?  I would never hurt kitty – nope not at all 🙂


Dear Bacon – We have this cool thing in our hood called doggy daycare.  It is like the total bomb in the summer!  The bus comes to our house, picks us up and takes us on field trips and play dates and the doggy facility.  OMD!  I so highly recommend this.  We go twice a week and this is our picture from the bus – it’s so cool.  This was our “we aren’t doing anything-sweet-and-innocent” looks on the way home.  Dude, you gotta check it out and see if they have one in your hood.  Signed Summer Fun

Dear Summer Fun – Oh my piggy heavens!  That sounds like so much fun for sure!  You get out, your humans get a break and you make lots of friends and see things all over.  Oh my gosh!  I’m so green with jealous.  I gotta check this out.  Thanks my friends for letting me know of this awesome experience.  I wanna go on field trips too!

 


Dear Bacon – We were set up!  We found several notes in the woods saying there was going to be a party here at the house and that cover charge was a buck.  We came but we were set up – there was no party!  The room was dark and no one was at home.  What a joke!  We were hoping for a great time and a full keg.  Should we stand here until someone comes home?  Signed Buck Party

Dear Buck Party – OMP!  The cover charge was a buck?  Shaking my piggy head.  Oh my friends – you were definitely set up on this one.  I’m so sorry but in a way you have to admit it was kind of funny.  Should you stand there until the family comes back?  Probably not.  I wouldn’t want to see what they have in store for you if you do.  I say chalk this one up to experience and keep tracking the woods to see if the familiar smell of the person that set you comes back.

Take care my friends.


Remember friends – Dear Bacon can’t happen without YOU.  Please continue to email me your letters and pictures.

 

 
17 Comments

Posted by on 06/21/2016 in Bacon, Dear Bacon

 

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