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Dear Bacon

20140717-070656-25616520.jpgDear Bacon – sshh be very quiet.  I’m the KING of hide and go seek with the dumb dog.  He *never* looks up.  I could have killed him several times with these massive claws of mine but I didn’t.  I let him live to see another day of how stupid he is.  Meow – just goes to show that the cat is the better breed in the anipal world.  How are you at hide and go seek my friend?  Signed Meows Hanging Tall

Dear Hanging Tall –  I would have to beg the difference with you my friend.  Pigs are pretty smart and intelligent as well.  Believe it or not but we are some of the smartest anipals in the world.  We don’t give away our secrets.  You may feel the need to hang from the doorway in your ‘hiding’ spot.  Keep up your ninja skills because after the pooch see’s this Dear Bacon issue, he will know exactly where you are hiding these days. :).

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Dear Bacon –  The humans gave us this great idea.  You see when they go to the doctor – even if it’s for a sore throat – and the doctor tells them to disrobe, they do it without thinking about it because a DOCTOR said to.  So me and my bro thought we can do that too.  We are going to set up shop in the hood and when the ladies come, we are going to do the same thing.  Sweet huh?  Signed Doctors Doogy and Albert

Dear “Doctors Doogy and Albert” –  Oh my piggy heavens!  Really?  One word my friends.  Just word is only needed.  PERVERTS.  P.S.  Stay away from my friends.

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20140717-070656-25616763.jpgDear Bacon –  Help!  The humans brought this Sir Barks A Lot miniature thing they call a dog into my home.  I have been stuck on this couch forever.  It won’t shut up.  It’s telling ME the rules of MY house.  What the cream cheese?  Make it stop dude.  Please.  Signed Helpless on Vinyl

Dear Helpless on Vinyl –  Not you too my friend?  My humans brought home one as well who likes to demand things.  Rolls piggy eyes.  The safest way to proceed, ignore him.  Hopefully he will go away.  And please come down off of the couch.  Look at yourself.  Cowering down over a pooch of what six pounds.  Oh my goodness – you do live with me!  My grief of torture is also six pounds.  We must unite.  Call me okay.  Maybe we can airmail them somewhere.  Snorts.

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.Dear Bacon – I don’t get why some dogs don’t like baths.  I ❤ baths.  When the humans leave for an evening out, the first thing I do is get the water running and add some bubbles.  Then I turn down the lights and jump in.  I know I have at least 2-3 hours before the humans return.  I highly recommend it.  What do you think?  Signed Splish Splash

Dear Splish Splash –  Well I must admit that you look really happy in your fun palace of bubbles.  If that’s what you are into, then I say enjoy buddy.  Everyone needs some way to let go of a little stress.  What are you hurting?  .

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REMEMBER FRIENDS – We can’t have Dear Bacon issues without YOU.  Keep your pictures and questions coming to me via email 🙂

 
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Posted by on 02/17/2015 in Bacon, Dear Bacon

 

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