Motorcycle for Sale

 OMP!  I have laughed and laughed and laughed after reading this.  This so sounds like something my daddy would have done – snorts.  Don’t you think?  The poor guy.  Too funny!

 

Mom/Dad You Have Some Explaining To Do

  If you don’t know much about anything else about me by this point, you have to know that my humans are strange… unpredictable if you will. They are *always* getting into some type of trouble.  They are always going out and about unchaperoned.  And there is no telling what chaos they cause anywhere they go.  You don’t believe me still?

  Let’s take a look at example 1 to the left here.   Okay let’s assume I was snooping and found this on mom’s iPhone under pictures.  What?  I didn’t say that I did it.  I said just assume… looks innocent.  Let’s get back to the point shall we.  Tell me this my friends.  Have you ever been in a restaurant where there was such ‘stuff’ hanging around?  I mean is it me or a skull riding a motorcycle kind of eccentric or pushing the envelope just a bit?  Let alone mom/dad told me that this place was adults only and you had to be 21 years of age to enter and eat.  Now I understand why.  This restaurant is called the Vortex Bar and Grill and mom even did a blog about it on her food blog here.  It has great food… not that this oinker got a piggy bag to go or anything.  Snorts – way to go mom/dad.

When I saw this picture above, I was like cool a skull.  Then I looked further and longer at the picture.  Then I was like – what the pig is that?!  And more importantly – why is it hanging on the wall wearing Mardi Gras beads?  What the heck did it do to get those beads?  Of course seeing one of my ancestors ‘mounted’ on a wall got me squealing to the high heavens above and mom had to come to my bedroom to see what the problem was.  I mean heck, it’s not every day you see this, right?

Mom saw what I was squealing about and sat down on my toddler bed with me for ‘a talk’.  First up was the talk about not snooping… hey I said assume but I guess I just got busted huh?  Mom mentioned something about privacy and some things I shouldn’t see – blah blah blah – and sometimes things seen or heard can not be now unseen or unheard – blah blah blah.

Okay mom got it.  Please explain why one of my ancestors is on the wall wearing beads.  Honestly, she didn’t know why but she explained to me that this animal was called a boar.  There are several different classes of boars and mostly run wild.  We are related through the ancestry leaves.  He is kind of a mascot of sorts at this restaurant.  Okay that’s cool.  He lives on in fame still kind of smiling if you look at the grin on his face.  I wonder if that is because of the lack of somewhat clothing the waitresses wear in this alternative bar?  Or is because of the different people he sees throughout the day from lawyers to bikers?  But I still have to ask. Why is he wearing beads?  What do you think is the story behind that my friends?  You know this piggy has an inquiring mind.

 

 

Motorcycle for Sale

 OMP!  I have laughed and laughed and laughed after reading this.  This so sounds like something my daddy would have done – snorts.  Don’t you think?  The poor guy.  Too funny!

 

On the Road with Bashful!

Bashful…the rolling stone

Hello my friends. Today I continue my field trip to Wally World – otherwise known to some as Wal-Mart. I had the best time there playing around and getting into trouble for that matter. I like to refer to my field trip at Wally World as Fun Land USA 🙂

I hope that one day in the near future perhaps I can go to this other place mom/dad call Target. They say it is similar to Wally World. I will definitely keep you posted on that adventure.

On this blog, I want to share the ‘rides’ at Wally World. They were so much fun! I got to ride as many as I possible could before mom/dad finally told me we had to leave. So, let’s start this exciting and adventurous time in pictures:

I got to ride a John Deere tractor! It was a hoot – you can see me on top of said tractor. Unfortunately, I was a little too round to fit inside – must go on diet – add that to my bucket list. I especially thought this was fun because mom/dad said that it cuts grass. I know what that is.

I watch my neighbor next door when he cuts the grass. He doesn’t have a tractor but a riding lawn mower that he calls Buddy. It is so cool! Maybe one day I can get my picture taken with the neighbor and Buddy to post 🙂

Then I saw Dora the Explorer. I know who she is because I watch her on television. And you know, she’s a lot like me. She explores and I do the same thing with my field trips, right? And the cool thing about her ride, I fit in it! Did you know that I learned a second language by watching her show? “Gracias mis amigos con mi viaje de campo. Valoro mucho que.” Roughly translated, “Thank you my friends for following my Field Trip. I really appreciate that.” See, rocks can learn something new. I’m trying to teach Bacon but he’s picked up some wicked southern accent from mom.

Then dad saw this set of wheels – call me Bashful Evel Knievel – vroom vroom. I wanted to take it for a spin around the store but dad said the establishment would frown upon that.

It was really kind of cool. It made noises. Mom finally told me to get off before I got hurt. She said it didn’t have doors and was dangerous. Come on mom, really? Let this rock let loose and have some fun!

This led me to the best ride at Fun Land USA. A police car! It had lights and sirens and was awesome! Again, this rock is too fluffy to fit inside so I rode on top of this wonderful little car.

Riding this car made me want to become a policerock when I grow up. I think that would be the coolest job in the entire world! What do you think?

Well, until next time my friends – have a great day and be good to yourselves.

Toodles – Bashful

 

Dear Bacon

Dear Bacon,
I hate baths. My humans think I need one every once in a while. I don’t. I mean why? I’ll just get dirty again, right? What can I do to change their minds? Signed On The Edge

Dear On The Edge,
Have you really tried to enjoy one my friend? It looks like your humans went all out and even put bubbles in the water. It even looks like a great tub my friend. I bet the water was even nice and warm. I myself love me a nice long bath. Especially when mom puts treats in the water. Maybe your humans need to try that? Suggest it and see how you feel then.

——————————————————————————————————————————————————

Dear Bacon,
All my life, I’ve been slow. Let me change that. I’ve been slower than slow… If that’s even a speed! People have been making jokes about me for years. But nowadays, watch out. I got some wheels and there I zoomed by. They catch me these days riding dirty. Have you ever thought about riding? Signed Slow and Steady

Dear Slow and Steady,
You look good. You really do. Just be safe. Me on a bike? Snort – you have to be kidding. Bikes don’t have doors. I’ve got to protect this work of art. The closest I get to a cycle is moms Smart car. Snort LOL. Ride on my friend.

——————————————————————————————————————————————————

Dear Bacon,
I love leather. I love the feel of it against my fur. Can you be honest and tell me if this jacket gives me chicken legs? Signed Biker Chick

Dear Biker CHICK,
So your question is does your leather jacket make you “look” like you have chicken legs? Now that’s a good questions. No, not at all. Your jacket doesn’t give that appearance at all. I think that diamond necklace draws attention to that gorgeous face of yours. Walking off shaking head laughing.

—————————————————————————————————————————————————–

Dear Bacon,
Hee hee. You’re always talking about those purr things that you love with on your page. I thought I would share a picture of what I do to my purr things. Laughing. I hide around corners until they walk by me. I think my purr thing only has maybe two life’s left. Rolling around laughing. Signed Gotcha

Dear Gotcha,
I have to admit that this is a good one. I will be saving it for future reference… I mean future not to do. Yeah, that’s it. Thanks my friend.

——————————————————————————————————————————————————

Dear Bacon,
Have you ever played patty cake? Me and my dears have a great time playing this during the day. It makes the day go by so much faster. We’re getting really good at it. I think that it should be made into an Olympic Game, don’t you? When one of us misses a move, another of our friends jump in to replace them. It’s a hoot! It makes our down season, I mean our life go by so quickly. Signed Reindeer Gamers

Dear Reindeer Gamers,
No. I can’t say that I’ve ever played patty cake. My hooves are kind of oddly shaped. And, I really don’t have that kind of balance with this pot belly if you know what I mean. It gets in the way when I try to ‘stand’. It looks kind of fun though. Perhaps you should video tape it and let it go viral on line at YouTube. Have fun my friends.

—————————————————————————————————————————————————–

Dear Bacon,
I know you can relate man. You talk about your snout. Heck, look at my snout per say. It’s a sharp situation. No touching noses with this thing my friend. Signed Horny

Dear Horny,
Ouch. You got me on that one. Be safe with that thing my friend.