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Can Instructions 

I see nothing weird with these cooking instructions, do you my friends?  Sounds about accurate to this little oinker – snorts with piggy laughter.

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10 Comments

Posted by on 07/16/2016 in Bacon

 

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Everyone Needs a Good Laugh

Sometimes we just need a good chuckle, a great laugh – something that starts in your belly and makes your snort.  With that in mind, let me see if I can make you laugh, snort or pee on yourself just a tad little bit – snorts with piggy laughter.

Are you ready?  Okay – here they come. 🙂 ❤

  • Did you hear about the pig who opened a pawn shop? He called it “Ham Hocks”.
  • Did you hear about the piglets who wanted to do something special for Mother’s Day? What did they do? They threw a sowprize party.
  • Why did the spotted pigs run away? They thought the traveling salesman told the farmer to put his name on the dotted swine.
  • What’s that pig doing in the middle of the road with a red light on its head? Didn’t you tell me to put out a stop swine?
  • Why did the pig run away from the pig sty? He felt the other pigs were taking him for grunted.
  • Two pigs robbed a bank.  Why were they caught so quickly?  They squealed on each other.
  • How does a mama pig put her piglets to sleep? She reads them pig tales.
  • What was the name of the hog who was knighted by Sir Arthur? Sir Lunchalot
  • Farmer asked the pigs, “Who raided my vegetable patch?” Piglet says,“Beets me.”
  • What is a pigs favorite ballet? Swine Lake
  • What do pigs drive? Pig-up trucks.

 

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22 Comments

Posted by on 03/27/2016 in Bacon

 

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Cookie Monster

20130220-081615.jpgI couldn’t resist posting this.

I absolutely snorted and rolled around laughing so hard when I found it.

I had to show it to mom and dad and they also got a kick out of it.  Mommy told me I had to put in on here in hopes that all of my friends get a great chuckle from it as well.

mmm – I’m kind of craving chocolate chip cookies myself now – I wonder why?  Snort

 
18 Comments

Posted by on 03/05/2016 in Bacon

 

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Dear Bacon – Tongue Edition – Snorts

Dear Bacon – Help!  Let alone I had to get a bath.  Let alone they wrapped me up like a tight burrito so much so that my tongue hung out.  Then the human had to take my picture.  Really?  I can’t even fight it I’m wrapped so tight.  Any thoughts on how to handle this fiasco?  Signed Burrito in Training

Dear Burrito in Training – Let’s look at this on a positive note.  Your humans love you so much that they (1) bathed you; (2) wrapped you up to dry you so you wouldn’t get sick in this awful cold weather and then (3) took a pic of you.  Sounds to me like they are working hard towards next years Christmas cards.  You can never plan too far in advance my friend.  So this is what you do.  Wait for them to go to sleep – you know the snoring, tongue hanging out and drooling from the mouth.  Then take their picture to replace yours.  Simple as that.  Snorts.


Dear Bacon – I’m not sure about you but us dogs, we can spell.  We know exactly what you are spelling when you say V.E.T.  I’m not the kind of dog that runs but you spell V.E.T. and I’m gone like the speed of light.  Nobody likes those guys at the V.E.T. office – I don’t care how many treats you get.  What say you Bacon?  Signed G.O.N.E.

Dear G.O.N.E. – I concur.  Nobody likes the peeps at the vet’s office.  No way!  I mean my goodness they think giving you a treat makes up for the violation they give to your captain’s quarters – I don’t think so.  I mean heck, at least you can buy me a Mint Julep or something first – snorts with piggy laughter.


      Dear Bacon – This should serve the human for leaving their camera phone on last night.  I left them a little something to find on their camera roll.  What do you think – do I have it or what?  Signed Hot for Hollywood

Dear Hot for Hollywood – Oh absolutely my friend.  How could anyone resist that cute little face and tongue?  I wish I could be a fly on the wall when your human finds that picture on their camera phone.  I bet they laugh and then oohh and aaaww for hours!


Dear Bacon – I don’t get it.  I live in the south and every time someone new sees me, they say, “Bless his little heart.”  I don’t get it.  What does that exactly mean.  You live in the south – do you get that often?  Signed This is My Happy Face

Dear This is My Happy Face – You see here in the south, that is a term of endearment.  Peeps often say that for no apparent reason.  I’ve heard peeps tell this to babies, older peeps, anipals and to each other.  I don’t think they mean anything by it.  Nope not at all.  How could they?  I look at you and see a masculine little guy that is going somewhere in the world.  You just accept that term as a compliment, hold your head up high and march right on into 2016!


Dear Bacon – I was asleep – you know taking one of many naps during the day.  I had my little hoodie on for some added heat.  My human woke me up and said, “Say Cheese?”  All my tummy heard was cheese so I stuck my tongue out.  Don’t you know that was the moment my mom decided to snap my pic.  Why – tell me why – do these humans do this?  Signed Sticking Tongue Out

Dear Sticking Tongue Out – Personally I think sometimes the humans try to catch us off guard in an attempt to get an amusing look from us for their cameras.  Every once in a while, I let mom *think* she has me and I do something for her amusement.  What can I say?  It keeps the humans happy therefore we get more treats.  I say play it for all its worth my friend.  Work it!


Remember my friends – Dear Bacon can’t happen without YOU.  Please continue to email me your letters and pictures ❤  

 
14 Comments

Posted by on 01/05/2016 in Bacon, Dear Bacon

 

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31 Days of Spook – Edward Mordrake

Oh friends.  This might be a scary one for you to digest.  Can you imagine a man with two faces?  Not only is this scary but sad.  Read below if you dare! 

 

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Thank *YOU* My Friends

Monday night I hit a milestone in my blog.  Something that this little oinker thought he would never see.

My friends – this could not have happened without YOU!  YOU read my ramblings.  Listen to me.  Participate with me.  YOU make my day.  My aim on my blog is just to make people laugh… maybe wee on themselves just a tiny bit.  I want to bring happiness to your day.  A little laughter.  Something that takes away your sorrow and brings a smile to your face.  Something that when you see a pig or hear a oink, you think of me… little ole Bacon from the Hotel Thompson.

Without YOU, none of this could happen.  I want to bring your happiness but let me tell you my friends.  YOU bring me happiness.  YOU make me smile.  YOU have taught me to overcome the obstacles and there is nothing that can hold this oinker back.  If I can dream it, I can become it.

Thank YOU for being my friend and visiting my blog.  I ❤ you ALL to the moon and back!

 
44 Comments

Posted by on 04/08/2015 in Bacon

 

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Dear Winter

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17 Comments

Posted by on 02/20/2015 in Bacon

 

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