Dear Bacon – What can I say? I’m a happy camper. I know your dislike for a certain frog but hey can’t we be buds? Not all of us frogs are all green and taking your woman. I understand completely. Does this look like a face of a frog that would take your Miss Piggy? I think not. Signed Can’t We Be Friends
Dear Can’t We Be Friends – Aaaww my new pal. I would love to be your friend. And you are right. I only dislike one certain green frog who thinks he is God’s gift to my woman… Kermit. When he decides to leave my Goddess alone, then we might possibly be friends as well. Kermit if you are listening – call me okay.
Dear Bacon – I know how your mom loves the mouse with white gloves, Mickey Mouse. I’m a fan of the other one – Minnie Mouse. My humans know how much I love her so they bought me this head gear to wear so I could be her. What do you think? Am I missing anything? Signed The New Minnie Mouse Dog
Dear The New Minnie Mouse Dog – You look amazing my friend. I absolutely ❤ it! My mom would be so envious in all of your glory. Do you know what would really set off your outfit? White gloves. Oh squeals. That would have all of the Mickey Mouse Club knocking on your door. You rock my new friend! Wear those ears with pride!
Dear Bacon – Don’t fear. This is not a scary movie or a remake of Jurassic Park. We are real. We live and roam in the Galapagos Islands in Ecuador. Wouldn’t it be a hoot to play together? Of course, you might run a smidgen faster than us but we would enjoy the company. If you are ever in these parts, call us okay. Signed Aldi and Gang
Dear Aldi and Gang – WOW! Ya’ll are awesome. I bet we would have a heck of a great time playing together. Do you think I could piggy back on one of ya’ll? Instead of the tortoise and the hare stories, we could make the tortoise and the Bacon stories – snorts and rolls with laughter.
Dear Bacon – Sure, pick on the cow. My so called friends dared me to get up here on this contraption. Said it would be fun and exciting. Yeah, it’s fun and exciting alright. Can you get me off of this thing pig? Signed Betsy
Dear Betsy, Oh dear piggy heavens my friend. You are in a pickle. I’ll call Farmer McDonald to come save you. Just don’t bounce okay. It might be a few minutes.
Dear Bacon – The humans they are fickle. I bought my human a gift. Something I worked hard on getting to repay them for their kindness in giving me my forever home. What do I get in return? A screech so loud that I think they heard it on the other side of the world. I really think I heard glass breaking somewhere in the house. Then the human did something even weirder. They jumped on the table and wouldn’t come off until I took their gift outside. Really? Fickle humans. Signed The Great Hunter
Dear The Great Hunter – Snorts. You see my friend. Humans like their food cooked… and only certain kinds of food. I don’t think mice are on their listed foods they eat. Yet, it was such a wonderful gift to give to them. You are the great hunter, so gifted. Maybe the next time though hunt some cow. I’ve heard they like cow…. a LOT. Carry on and safe hunting.
REMEMBER FRIENDS – We can’t have Dear Bacon issues without YOU. Keep your pictures and questions coming to me via email 🙂