There comes a time in a little pigs life that he needs to start thinking about his future. I thought perhaps I had a career picked out but mom set me straight – thank goodness. My texts are in blue and moms are in gray. Enjoy.
Tag Archives: job
Paw Time with Houdini
Hello sweet friends – welcome to my Paw Time with Houdini. Today is Cinco de Mayo and we here at the Hotel Thompson have been getting ready for the holiday all week. You might have read earlier in the week where daddy is going to join a mariachi band to attempt to make some extra money for our surprise in September. Well we know that every super hero – even a mariachi singer – needs a side kick. So mom went shopping with Nana and look what they found me – can you believe it?! My very own Mexican poncho with fringe – barks with puppy excitement. I think it fits my little bum just perfect. I am so ready to go out tonight for some partying…. just a couple of houses down from me they are throwing a party. We have been invited. Of course, they wanted Bacon as guest of honor so he backed out.
Between daddy dressing up with his guitar and me with my new poncho, hopefully we can make a little side money. Wish us luck.
But wait a minute, I’m not done. Barks! Nope I’m not.
I want to share what my brother Phenny’s dad made me from across the pond. *Now* I think I’m ready to start rolling some r’s and singing. Oh mom, can you practice some Spanish with me now? Hasta la vista babies! ❤
And now I leave you with Jokes with Daddy – enjoy my friends ❤
I Think I’ve Found the Perfect Job
OMP – OMP – OMP! I’ve done it. I have found the *perfect* job. The pay is awesome – $44,350 a year! That’s some chunk change for this oinker. It’s great. It’s perfect. It’s right up my alley. It even includes perks like free meals (which is important to me), transport (which is good since I can’t drive) and accommodations. It would be almost like living here at the Hotel Thompson – snorts. What is it you ask?
A PANDA HUGGER! How cool is that? I can hug pandas – especially when I’m getting paid to do it. My only assignment is to spend “365 days with the pandas sharing in their joys and sorrows.”
Does that not sound prefect? Of course, I would have to move to China. But they have internet, right? I could still blog about my life there.
So what do you think? You think China is ready for me to become a Panda Hugger? Could mom/dad live without me here at the Hotel Thompson?
Dear Bacon – Don’t let the humans fool you. There comes a day that they cut off the nibbles. They finally told me that I needed to work for my treats. The nerve! So I did what I could. I applied and got a job at the local Home Depot. The pay sucks. It’s hot in here and can you believe they trust me with tools? Shakes kitty head. Ask for me the next time you are in the store. Signed What Project Can I Help You With?
Dear What Project Can I Help You With – Well I have to say you look very professional. And don’t forget about your resume for future jobs. I would definitely come to you for assistance for sure. I would be surprised if you don’t start with a big following at your store location. You just have that “I’m here for you” look. Really you do.
Dear Bacon – Where is it written that only dogs can be used for protection? I’m just saying that there are other anipals out here that will serve and protect what is rightfully theirs. You see me in the picture, right? Look to the left midways. That is my kingdom. My backyard. I will chase unwanted guests out of my kingdom… you know like the meter reader guy, squirrels, kitties and those pesky pooches. I let them get in the yard fully and then it’s on like Donkey Kong. My humans had to put this sign on the gate because some peeps complained. Can you believe that? Signed Killer
Dear Killer – Shakes and Shivers. You scare me my friend. I believe you when you say what is yours well is YOURS. That’s the way I feel about my magical backyard It has *my* smells – it doesn’t need anything else. I say you continue to do what you do. No one needs to be in your domain at all.
Dear Bacon – My human laughs at me. But I gotta tell you, this position is my favorite kitty hanging down yoga position. It helps the blood flow all the way through your body – even your tail. I highly recommend it. Signed Kitty Hanging Down
Dear Kitty Hanging Down – WOWZER! I’ll have to take your word about this favorite position of yours my friend. I’m not sure if it would really work for this oinker. You see I have what they call a pot belly and trust me I’ve worked hard on that pot belly. I don’t think it would let me ‘hang’ like you do. But you enjoy my friend!
Dear Bacon – Do you think people realize when they knock on our door that we enforce a strict no solicitation rule here at our crib? We mean business. Unless you are delivering pizza – oh YES – then go to the house next door please. They have a cute little poodle who lets everyone in. Signed Four Amigos
Dear Four Amigos – I get it. I really do. Oh my pigs – you have the ‘look’ down pact with don’t mess with us and we are the first means of getting through this door. I bet you don’t get a lot of door to door sales people. I commend you on that. When I visit, I will definitely bring pizza.
Stay strong my friends!
Dear Bacon – It might have been the beer. It might have been the tequila. It might just have been the fact I stayed up all night and partied. Shakes head slowly because the world is still moving in this position. I’m never drinking again. Signed Wobbly
Dear Wobbly – Oh my friend. When you drink and fall down, you need help. Perhaps I can give you the number to your local K9 AA meeting in your area. Admission is the first step so you are half way there.
REMEMBER friends. Dear Bacon can’t happen without YOU. Please continue to send me your pictures and questions via email.
That’s Not My Job
Dear Bacon – Practice this look my friend. This is the look that will get you everything and anything from your humans. One wink and they melt. Use this advice with caution though. If you wink, your humans may get all goo-goo, pick you up and kiss you all over. Signed Winks
Dear Winks – What an awesome gift buddy. I’ll have to practice this in my bedroom in the mirror to get it down pact. I can’t wait to try it out on my mom and Nana. Happy winking!
Dear Bacon – The proof is in the picture. This is me helping out Santa last year. You see Santa has all of the humans to deliver presents too and he needs help. Me and about 500 of my friends help Santa out with the Christmas deliveries to anipals. They believe too. Of course some of them get on the naughty list more so than humans – ha! So keep on believing my oinker friend. Signed Santa’s Helpers
Dear Santa Helpers – I do BELIEVE my friends. I’ve heard Santa on my roof. I’ve heard his boot steps in the living room. AND I’ve seen Santa kissing my mommy last year at our Christmas Mickey Mouse pole lamp. He is real! And us anipals here at the Hotel Thompson really, REALLY try to stay on the good list. Nobody wants coal in their stockings on Christmas morning. Nope. Not here. Carry on with your awesome job my friends!
Dear Bacon – Stop everything. I gotta know. What does a squirrel have to do to get a gig like that Journalist Rocky the Squirrel that lives in your backyard. Dude, he has it made from what I can read. He lives rent free at your Hotel. Ya’ll give him nuts throughout the year. He’s off limits for the dogs in the hood. AND he gets to write on your blog. What do I have to do for that position? Signed Job in Need
Dear Job in Need – Journalist Rocky the Squirrel is a very special squirrel with talents. He has an awesome resume and has worked all over the south. Rocky also knows several different languages from chitter-chatter to English to pig Latin and he also speaks Squatch. Squatch comes in handy when our local Bigfoot comes out to play. Send us your resume and we will pass it along to Rocky. Perhaps he can forward somewhere for you. 🙂
Dear Bacon – This is a new campaign I’m putting out there. “Paws out to Animal Abuse”. We all have to make a stand. Animals are meant for loving not harming. Can you help me pass the word my friend? Signed Just Say NO to Abuse
Dear Just Say NO to Abuse – I’m all in with four hooves my friend. I’ll even throw in my part and say, “Hooves out to Animal Abuse”. Animals have feelings and should never be harmed. It makes my mohawk stand up straight on edge when I hear stories of my fellow anipals in harm. We have nothing but love to give to humans and in turn that’s all we want from them. Great cause my friend – stand strong!
REMEMBER my friends – Dear Bacon can’t happen without YOU. Please remember to send me your pictures and letters – thanks!
HAPPY WEEKEND my dear friends. Do you have anything planned? What are you doing? I think we have errands to run tomorrow. I’m going to see if I can persuade mom if I can tag along for some of them. It should be a blast. So if you see a little blue Smart car in a drive thru or on the road somewhere, check the back for me. I’ll be the piggy oinking and snorting. I would wave but you know I have short legs – snorts.
But I do want to leave you with something to think about this weekend. I saw this in the kitchen the other day and snagged a picture. Mommy said it was milk. Let me tell you something – I want to see the size of the cow that filled these little cups with milk. OMP (oh my pig!) Do you see the size of this milk bottle? That’s about the right size of it too in the picture. Was it a mini-cow? And how long did it take to fill those cups? Remind me that I don’t want *that* job.
Have an awesome day and weekend!!
Do *You* Have What it Takes?
Okay my friends – here’s your chance! I get lots of snail mail and emails from anipals needing help desperately. Heck, me and my mailman are now on a first name basis!
Are you patient? Are you great at giving advice? Do you have a warped sense of humor? Do you often give out advice to your friends for free?
If so, this job is for YOU my friend. As you know, my weekly Dear Bacon issue comes out every Tuesday. I am opening up my calendar for September 2014 for Special Guests to do my weekly issue. That’s 5 weeks that are available on a first come first serve basis.
I will forward you my letters/pictures and all you have to do is answer the letters and return them back to me upon completion. I will then give you a date that it will be published. Sound like fun?
You’ve seen other guests step into my hooves and help me out with my weekly Dear Bacon issues. Do you have what it takes? Send me an email at firstname.lastname@example.org with your information and I’ll take it from there. Hope to hear from you my friends!
NOTE: This invitation is open to everyone whether you have already done an issue or you want to try your talents out for the first time and do one.
T.G.I.F. Everyone recognizes those four letters from all over the world. Thank Goodness It’s Friday. Those four letters brings smiles and hoorays to the humans and us anipals. But I bet you didn’t know that they also have another meaning. Shocking huh?
You see my mom has worked a lot of different jobs. She once worked with our local school system for six years. Trust me, she has told me stories of those times. There is *never* a dull moment working with elementary children – ever! One of the stories that she told me was about T.G.I.F. I’ve never forgotten it and neither has she. It was sweet and kind and so childish – it was great and still brings a smile to mom’s face and mine to this day. I’ll tell you what happened and you be the judge here okay.
Mom was in the front office of the school and this little boy who was in the first grade came into the office. He was crying. So mom being the gal she is walked up to him and immediately hugged him. She then took him to the side office and they sat on the couch together. You see he was having a bad day and it was only 9:00AM. His dad was overseas in the military and his mom had to work. She couldn’t get off work to come see him in his first grade play. He was beside himself! And for a first grader – this was just the end of the world – you can imagine.
Mom talked to him for a few moments and tried to get him to brighten up a bit. She volunteered to step in for his mom to come see him in his play. His upside down face turned into the biggest smile you would ever see and his tears of grief turned into tears of joy. He just couldn’t believe that my mom was going to do that for him. She got the time from him that she should attend and helped him clean up his face.
That’s when she noticed that one of his shoes were untied. She got down on the floor and tied it for him. That’s when she saw this T.G.I.F. written on the toes of his shoes.