September we are highlighting some of my friends who volunteered to help me out with my Dear Bacon issue. Today’s special edition is by some wonderful little purr thing friends – Archie, Oscar and Henry. You know them from their blog – mythreemoggies If you don’t know them, you *must* go visit them and check them out. Tell them that Bacon sent you. Now, on to some great advice to help out our fellow anipals.
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Dear Dear Archie, Oscar and Henry,
My mom said that if I behaved at the flea market, I could ride the merry go round. Bark-bark-bark. As you can see, I got to ride! Bark – it’s so much fun. Bark – can you tell I’m having fun? Signed Happy Bark
Dear Happy Bark,
It looks like you’re going round the twist. You’re barking mad. You can’t carousel on like this!
We know you dogs like to go a little crazy every now and then: chasing your tails, running after sticks, barking at the wind. But this is too much.
You need to be a little more cat… Quit the fairground, find yourself a nice warm bed and grab forty winks. That’s true happiness.
Signed Archie, Oscar and Henry
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Dear Archie, Oscar and Henry,
What the cream cheese! There’s something slimy that confronted me today in my own living room. What the heck is the cast off from Sponge Bob? Have you ever seen this before. I’m not sure what I do with it – play with it, eat it or show it to the door. Thoughts? Signed Escardog
Dear Escardog,
This is a slimy situation you’ve got yourself into. Of course, your first resort to any intruder is to think ‘food’, but this is not Paris notre petit ami. You need to have a word in his shell like and tell him to sling his antennae.
Signed Archie, Oscar and Henry
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Dear Archie, Oscar and Henry
What!? Haven’t you ever seen a dog turning in for the night? I have to get a good nights sleep so I’m in shape to chase the mailman in the morning. It’s what I do. Come on now – you can admit to me that you sleep like this too. Signed Napdog
Dear Napdog,
This is what we’re meowing about. Sleep like a king our friend!
The importance of a good kip isn’t lost any self respecting moggie, and it’s a relief to see our canine pals finally embracing the power of slumber. After all, that mailman won’t chase himself.
Signed Archie, Oscar and Henry
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Dear Archie, Oscar and Henry
Ha! I’m the littlest on the farm. The other animals like to horse around and bully me. I do what I do best. I sneak behind the trees and stick my tongue at them. When they chase me, the humans catch them picking on me. What!? Like you’ve never done that before? Signed Horse N Round
Dear Horse N Round,
This is neigh way to behave!
You need to stand up to yourself – are you a horse or a mouse?
Us moggies were brought up on da streets, and the rule there is you never grass. Actually, the rule is you eat the grass but whose letter is this anyway?
Signed Archie, Oscar and Henry
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Dear Archie, Oscar and Henry
Hey guys. I need your help. I’m a traveling door to door salesman. For some reason, when I ring door bells no one answers. I don’t get it. Can you help me out? Signed Gator Calling
Dear Gator Calling,
You have an image problem. Smarten yourself up, employ a make over artist and get yourself a nice suit.
These gator-phobes won’t change their attitude unless you make the first move.
Oh, and make it snappy!
Signed Archie, Oscar and Henry
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Remember my friends – Dear Bacon can’t happen without *you*. Please continue to send your letters and questions to me here at the Hotel Thompson at baconthompson@gmail.com
Piglove 