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Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?

  Really?  That is the question for the day.  Mommy kissed all of us goodbye this morning and walked out the door.  We heard her chuckling from the front porch.  Why do you ask?  Look closely at the picture above.  Across the street in the yard, there was a chicken.  A real goodness chicken.  Why did it cross the road?  Probably because it knew of mom’s passion for fried chicken?  Snorts and rolls around in piggy laughter.

Never fear – the chicken is live and well.  Mom knocked on the owner’s door and told him his chicken was out.  He said it got out of his chicken house. What a thought.  There’s an escaped chicken in our hood.

 
15 Comments

Posted by on 09/03/2015 in Bacon

 

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Should I Be Worried?

 Sometimes I’ll admit it – my mom/dad scare me.  No, not the BOO kind of scare.  The kind of scare when I go looking for mom’s pictures on her iPhone kind of scare.  Take in point the picture below.  Mom/dad what the heck were you thinking?  See, this is the kind of trouble that happens when mom/dad go out unchaperoned.  They don’t need to look for trouble – trouble finds THEM.

Rub Some Butt, Three Little Piggies BBQ Rub, Bone Suckin’ Sauce and Sweet Rub of Mine – really?  Do I need to even ask where this ‘stuff’ needs to go?  Dad don’t even think about coming my way with any of these bottles in your hand.  I may need to ask for an intervention here at the Hotel Thompson.  Daddy was too quick to let me know that some of these traveled to our house here.  I haven’t seen them and Lord knows I don’t wanna.

Help me?  Snorts and Oinks …. while I still can.

NOTE:  I know I’m safe my friends.  No worries here at the Hotel Thompson.  Mommy wouldn’t let anything happen to me for anything in the world.  No need to call PETA… yet 🙂

 
17 Comments

Posted by on 08/14/2015 in Bacon

 

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Simpler Times

While Bacon is a camp this week, I want to focus on a few things that as adults we have forgotten about when we were children. LOL – this only makes sense since my little guy is away at Camp.  He grunted like he didn’t want to go but I think he secretly loved getting away and traveling like his pet rock.

It seems like when we were younger, that was the more simpler times in our lives.  As children we didn’t have bills or a lot of toys but it seemed like we had the world at our feet.  We went outside and played.  I mean ran around and played ball, climbed trees and searched for bugs and watched the moonlight. We played hopscotch and hide and go seek.  We socialized with other kids, screamed outside and had a blast.  As long as we were in ears reach of our parents when they called, we were rich with our nature.  Do you remember staying out late and catching lightening bugs? Or do you remember chasing frogs?

And oh should we discuss riding in the family car with our parents on long trips.  We didn’t use seat belts and look – we all survived which was amazing.  I remember going on vacation and we would leave at night and drive to our destination.  Us kids would be sacked out in the back of the car.  One of us would lay across the floorboards, one of us would get the seat to stretch out and one of us would sleep in the back window  The horror of not wearing seat belts!  Now *those* were the days.  And what about going to the lake.  You would throw a bunch of blankets in the back of the pick up truck so that you had a place to lay down after swimming all day so you could watch the stars in the sky.

We played so hard as children that when we went to bed we would have ‘growing pains’ in our legs from running all day.  Do you remember those?  But hey it was all worth it because the next day we would be out doing it all again.

And we watched the *good* cartoons like Scooby Doo, the Jetson’s, Tom and Jerry and the Flintstones.  Cartoons that actually made sense and are still fun to watch this day. And after dinner, we watched television with the parents until bed time.  Awesome shows like Happy Days, Fantasy Island, Mork and Mindy, Chips, Wonder Woman, the Facts of Life and Alice.  Who could forget Alice?  “Kiss my grits!”

What do you remember from childhood.  What did you do that you don’t see children doing these days?

 
31 Comments

Posted by on 07/27/2015 in Bacon

 

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Dear Bacon

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Dear Bacon – There is *always* that one friend.  You know the one that ‘dares’ you to do something and says, “What are you afraid”?  Why did I have to fall for it.  Can you tell me that?  And then if that wasn’t bad enough, Ethel has to then photobomb me and take a picture for her Facebook account.  Dude, I long for the days before all of this social media.  Signed Jack

Dear Jack – WOW.  I see that you are in a predicament my friend.  I don’t even know Ethel dared you to do but the how the heck did you get out of that funky position?  Of course, for payback and before she photobombed you all you had to do was lift that left leg in a strategic position and that would smack that smirk right off of her face – snorts.  You know friend, this just screams for payback.  And make it GOOD.  I mean really GOOD.  And then post it on your Facebook account… or perhaps get Christmas cards made.  Now that sounds like a plan of destruction.  Keep me posted with the results and don’t take any more dares anytime soon okay.


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Dear Bacon – HA!  This will teach my humans.  I ran away from home and they have yet to find me.  What do you think?  Am I the master of disguises or what?  Signed Hide N Seek Master

Dear Hide N Seek Master – You are the boss my friend.  I had to take several looks myself to see which ‘rock’ was you.  And your parents haven’t found you yet.  That’s so awesome.  Just remember to come out in time for dinner okay.


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Dear Bacon – They said I could do and be anything I wanted.  So I decided I wanted to water ski.  And let me tell you something – it is fantastic!  So invigorating.  It makes me feel like I weigh nothing at all.  I highly recommend it my friend.  Signed Weightless

Dear Weightless – You know you have my interest piqued now my friend.  I think I may try this soon… especially since mom/dad are sending me to this awful thing called C.A.M.P.  Stay safe.


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Dear Bacon – Have you ever just had one of those days that you needed a little something to take the edge off?  This was me last weekend.  I just couldn’t take chasing the postman anymore… or tying up and blaming the cat for everything.  I needed a little liquid refreshment in a place where everyone knew my name and it was a fun place.  And hey, this wine is awesome.  Have you ever felt like this?  Signed Stud at the Bar

Dear Stud at the Bar – Oh yes indeed.  There are days that I feel the world is overcoming me… especially this past weekend.  We could have met up my friend.  Perhaps split a bottle of Francis Ford Coppola wine and whined on each other’s shoulders or downfalls in life in general.  I’m sure it would have been a blast.  Call me next time okay.


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Dear Bacon – I’m not sure my son gets the full effect of my look here.  This is my what.do.you.mean.you.want.to.stay.out.all. night.long.partying.look.  Does it work for you?  Do I need to change something for more of an effect?  Any suggestions?  Signed Dad in Charge

Dear Dad in Charge – I think you have the look down pact.  Did you follow it with, “Not while you are living under my roof?” and “While you are living under my roof, you will obey my rules”?  That usually works when my dad uses them on us anipals here at the Hotel Thompson.  Maybe take away his allowance.  That *always* hurts this little oinker where it counts.  Good luck with your son my friend.  Just think of these as his teenage rocky years.


Remember my friends – Dear Bacon can’t happen without YOU.  Please continue to send me your letters and pictures to my email address.  🙂

 

 
7 Comments

Posted by on 07/14/2015 in Bacon, Dear Bacon

 

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Bacon’s Tales of Terror

 Welcome my friends to another Bacon’s Tales of Terror on the 13th.  You do know that I search everywhere for just the right story to bring to you.  Something scary.  Something a little strange and macabre.  Something that makes the little hairs on the back of your neck stand to attention.  You know – just for oinks and snorts. 🙂

Well this month is no different.  I came across something that totally freaked out this little oinker.  Then I showed it to mom and she went oohh weird.  Then, I knew it was the perfect story to bring to you – my friends in blogville that like a little bit of the bizarre.  So I hope you enjoy this little tidbit as well we did.  Remember the next time you get up in the middle of the night and hear things that go bump in the night, some times you can’t see things they may be looking at you.  Shivers and good day.

 
20 Comments

Posted by on 07/13/2015 in Bacons Tales of Terror

 

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Happy New Years! – Article from my Mom :)

 Happy New Years my friends!  Can you believe that it is already 2015 – Where did 2014 go?  Today, I’m going to do something a little different here on my blog.  I want to share with you something that my mother wrote recently on handicaps.  It may be a little long, but I hope you take the time to read it.  I think this will be perfect to start this new year with awareness and kindness and paying it forward.  Enjoy and let me know what you think 🙂

Let’s play a game.  Close your eyes, tight now no looking.  Now, I want you to try to do things around your house.  Go to the kitchen and get a drink; try going to the bathroom; turning the television on; or making a phone call.  Can you do it?  Can you remember the layout of your home?  Can you remember what your phone looks like and where the numbers are?  What about the remote control?

 These are all problems that my husband encounters everyday.  You see in 2004, he was in a minor car accident and almost died. That’s right I said minor accident.  He was only going 30 miles per hour when a car accident happened and his airbags deployed.  The force of the airbags against his chest caused massive blood clots in his lungs.  He was in intensive care for nearly 12 weeks coming close to death several times.  In fact at one point, the doctors asked mommy if she believed in miracles because it was time to start praying for one. 😦

Within two years of his accident and many, MANY surgeries that we lost count, he lost his vision.  This is not a story to say, “Oh dear, you poor thing”.  This is a story to enlighten people, restaurants and businesses.  Handicaps are not just visibly seen by wheelchairs, walkers or canes.  Some handicaps you would never know unless you knew the person.  This is my husband Jim.  He does everything we do just with a little help.

 When we go out together, we are always holding hands.  This is something that we have always done for the 26 years we have been together.  But now, it’s also to help guide Jim.  He doesn’t use a cane and it’s not because of vanity.  Jim and others with vision impairments want to be ‘normal’ as much as they can be and I can deal with that.  Wouldn’t you?  He does everything you and I do but just with a little help.

 When we go out to eat, we hold hands walking to the table.  If you are close enough to hear us, you might hear me say, “Walk straight, your chair is to the left.”  And you will see Jim walk straight to his chair just like he ‘saw it’.  You may hear me discussing the menu just like regular people do on, “What do you want to eat?”  You might even hear me tell him when the food comes to the table, “Chicken on the bottom, green beans to the left and corn to your right.”  But other than that, Jim can eat all by himself just like a big boy. 🙂  So, you might not ‘see’ that he has a visual impairment.  And after dinner when we walk to the car, you will see Jim open my car door for me and then walk to his side and get in.  Does that ‘look’ like a handicap to you?

 But here is where we need to step up in businesses and restaurants.  We are all for a little romantic dinner in a restaurant where the mood is set and the lights are low.  But some restaurants tend to push the envelope a little more these days.  But for someone with a visual handicap that might ‘see’ perhaps a little light to guide them, a little mood set with lights low makes them completely blind.  The little bit of tunnel vision Jim might have in one eye is now completely blocked by low light setting and where he might be able to look ‘naturally’ before now he can’t.  You add the low lighting with a white table cloth and white dishes, he is going to stumble around on his plate.  His drink might get bumped.  He may drop his napkin.  Waiters/Waitresses – please note this is not something that he is doing ‘on purpose’.  Please don’t say something to him negatively.  Please don’t “talk down” to him like a child.  And by all means watch what you say not to insult.  People with vision impairments don’t do these things on purpose.  They don’t want the extra attention.  They want to feel normal in every aspect that they can.  When we ask for a table with a little more light, don’t make a big deal by the request.  I mean we could eat at home and we often do but don’t we all want to go out from time to time?

 And bathrooms in public – sigh.  More businesses and restaurants really need to come up family bathrooms.  We have come across these in our travels and they are fabulous!  Why do you ask?  Well, hopefully in your own home you know the layout of your bathroom.  But in a strange place, can you imagine closing your eyes and feeling your way around in a bathroom when you have to potty?  There have been a lot of times that I will walk Jim to the door, open it and try to peak in to tell him where everything is – beware men – I’m not trying to look at what you are doing 🙂 Really, I’m not.

 If you see someone that is acting ‘off’ and it doesn’t ‘show’ that they have a handicap, they may just have a visual handicap that you don’t see.  Instead of walking by or acting like you might catch it, why don’t you stop and chat.  Don’t worry, they won’t bite.  Believe me, just because they are visually impaired,  they do have a sense of humor still.

If they are trying to go to the restroom, why don’t you volunteer to guide them.  Trust me, they won’t hesitate for your help.  If they drop their flatware on the floor, why don’t you replace it and touch their shoulder and say, “No problem sir”.  If you have someone that asks for a more lit table, don’t belittle them or act like it’s a big deal – accommodate

And don’t think Jim is being a snob if he doesn’t shake your hand when you offer yours.  Just a heads up – most people with a visual impairment can’t see your hand.  🙂  Sometimes it helps if you touch their shoulder and say, “Good to meet you”.  And of course, if I’m there I will be glad to tell Jim your arm is extended.  Don’t worry.  You can shake hands.  You won’t catch his blindness.

Most handicapped people don’t want a free pass.  They want to feel like they fit in and can still do what they once could.  Jim is the same.  He knows our house like the back of his hand.  He takes care of the kids and the house.  He can clean like you wouldn’t believe!  He makes the beds.  He does all of the laundry.  He does the dishes.  He can cook for himself.  Astonishing huh?  It just takes a few tweaks on my part to make his life like it once was.  The microwave is marked, the washing machine is marked, the dryer is marked – all with little tabs that he can ‘feel’ to turn on and off.

 I’m not writing this story for sympathy.  I’m not writing this story for money.  I’m writing this story for knowledge on visual impairments.  The next time you see someone with a visual problem – where you see it with someone using a cane or being guided by someone, don’t fear them or treat them differently.  Be kind and helpful.  And hey – why not even help their caregiver out for a while.  Do you know that must people with visual impairments still like to do things for their loved ones.  This has been one of the biggest downfalls to Jim’s vision.  There are times that he would love to go get me a card or some flowers but how can he when he can’t drive himself to do such a wonderful gesture?  Perhaps if you know someone with a visual problem, offer to take them out for such a trip 🙂

In the new year let’s start practicing a little Luke 6:31, “Do to others as you want them to do to you”.  Happy New Years!

 
59 Comments

Posted by on 01/01/2015 in Bacon

 

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Dear Bacon

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Dear Bacon – They know me in the wild as the guy to go to for back adjustments.  We all have problems with our backs from time to time.  You know with all of the jumping, running and playing with our buddies.  So I’m here to offer you my services dude.  When your giddy up has gone and went, give me a call for an adjustment.  Signed Crack Doctor

Dear Crack Doctor –  WOW.  I’m at a lost for words.  Really.  By the looks of that purr thing that you are “adjusting”, I would take a gander and say they are as well.  Back adjustments… hhhhmmm… I think I’ll pass.  You know the little tyke here Houdini has great paws for massages.  I think I’ll call him for a massage.  But hey, I appreciate the offer.  You carry on and flourish with your business my friend.


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 Dear Bacon – Let’s understand each other okay.  You show respect to us purr things and I won’t have to call that elf of yours Don Juan.  Capice?  We have ways of making our communication brutal.  Just one phone call from Hemi or Mouse Girl and I will drop a line to elfy.  We wouldn’t want that now would we?  Signed Enforcer

Dear Enforcer – gulps.  Understand my friend.  I understand completely.  No reason to call Don Juan.  We are all family here.  Love your coloring and by the way have I told you that purr things rock?  They really do – honestly.  Creeps out of this letter….slowly and silently.


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 Dear Bacon – Sometimes the best things in life is just sitting back to watch the animals and humans.  You can see some amazing things in the household when you do this.  Just be quiet and observe.  Have you ever done this?  Signed Voyeur

Dear Voyeur – YES I agree 100% my friend.  One time, I watched daddy come out of the shower.  My eyes!  What has been seen can not be unseen.  And hey, he jumped pretty high when I snorted – rolls with laughter.  Carry on watching and let me know what you see next. 🙂


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 Dear Bacon – I *almost* got caught in this picture.  I mean dude it was a close call for sure!  The barky thing is so loud and loves to pick on us purr things when the humans aren’t lucky.  I had it with that mutt up to my forehead.  So, he came by and I was just about to flick my nails out when I saw the humans out of the corner of my eye.  Thank goodness I saw them looking so I did what all cats do best – I looked disinterested and innocent.  You know the look I’m sure.  But it definitely was a close one.  Have you ever been almost caught in action?  Signed Wolverine

Dear Wolverine – Squeals!  That was a close call my friend.  Thank goodness your spidey senses were working and you noticed the humans.  I hope that you did get even with the barky thing when it was more convenient – snorts.  I’m sure he had it coming his way.  Snorts – have a great one!


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 Dear Bacon – Really?  This is the juvenile behavior I have to put up with at my own castle.  My little brother doesn’t get his way so he acts like a small person wearing diapers and sticks his tongue out at me.  Really?  What is he two?!  What am I to do?  Shakes head.  Signed – Beyond Irritated

Dear Beyond Irritated – Just walk away.  My best advice my friend.  Unless you want to contact the Enforcer up above or Wolverine from up above.  I’m sure they can tell you a few pointers.  I certainly couldn’t.  Cause you know I’m just so cute and would never do anything to anyone. 🙂  Right Enforcer?  Snorts.

 


 

Remember friends – keep your pictures and questions coming.  Send them to my email address.  Have a great day!

 
27 Comments

Posted by on 12/09/2014 in Bacon, Dear Bacon

 

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31 Days of Spook – Picture Submission

Hello my friends.  Have you enjoyed my 31 Days of Spook this year?  Have you been frightened beyond belief?  Are you listening to every little bump in the night?  Are you sleeping with a nightlight yet?  Snorts.  Today, we have a guest picture submission.  Just a little something that was submitted by my close friend Ray Laskowitz.  Do you know Ray?  If not, you really need to check out his web page here.  He has the most awesome and beautiful pictures.

Ray submitted a picture that was taken in Old Kenner which is just up the street from New Orleans.  Was it photoshopped or how much was photoshopped?.  You’ve read some pretty wicked stories this month on my blog with some of them based in New Orleans.  We’ll just let you decide on the picture okay my friends.

 
22 Comments

Posted by on 10/30/2014 in 31 Days of Spook, Bacon

 

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31 Days of Spook – House in the Woods

Happy 31 Days of Spook my friend.  

I’m glad to see that you are surviving this month with me.  Today I have a question for you.  You see this house off in the woods.  It’s raining something fierce.  You need shelter because you don’t have a raincoat let alone an umbrella.  The storm is getting worse and now lightening is ripping across the sky and thunder is booming and echoing in the woods.  So the question is my pretty’s – do you go into this house for shelter waiting for the storm to pass?  Oh and let me add a little twist to the equation.  This house is reputed to be haunted.  So what do you say?  Are you up for a little adventure my friends?

 

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35 Comments

Posted by on 10/15/2014 in 31 Days of Spook, Bacon

 

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31 Days of Spook – Story Submission

BOO!

How are you making it my dear sweet friends.  Are you enjoying my 31 Days of Spook.  Are you getting scared yet?  Do you need to hold my hoof?  Today I have another great story submission by my pals Mop, Dusty, Billy, Pip, Cupcake and Cocoa.  Do you know these happy little guinea pigs from Living the Squeak Life?  If you don’t you are surely missing out on some entertainment and adventures.  Be sure to visit their blog – and tell them that Bacon sent you.

“Whee went on a little camp not too long ago and stayed in a grand old house once the home of an old Earl. It wasn’t long before whee learned that the hall had many creepy stories hanging over it, wheek! Now whee will share our tale with you. Mop, being our story-teller, will lead this story.

 I led my friends up the stairs. There were many grand stairs which led to a large room at the bottom. The perfect place for a wedding. I could already imagine the Bride-Pig coming down here from one side, meeting her father before descending down to meet the Groom-Pig at the bottom of the stairs.

Seemed I wasn’t the only one who thought this! For, what were the odds that on that very day there was a wedding?  A beautiful piggy in a gorgeous dress sat at the top of the stairs.

“Sorry!” I squeaked, filled with embarrassment. Pip was rather attracted to the pale grey sow but, I promptly reminded him that she was in a wedding dress. “I didn’t realize that there was a wedding here today.”

She promised that it was okay and so on whee carried. After exploring the hall whee headed back down to where our tour guide waited. “You didn’t tell us there was a wedding today!” Cupcake wheeked, ever the old romantic.

“There isn’t.” He replied.

Whee were horrified! Who was that whee had bumped into? A bit of research soon uncovered a creepy story about an unfaithful Bride-Pig who slept with another boar on the night before her wedding. In a rage the Groom-Pig killed her and she has wandered the halls ever since, looking for the wedding that never was. Is it her who whee saw? The Grey Piggy of the hall?”

 
23 Comments

Posted by on 10/10/2014 in 31 Days of Spook, Bacon

 

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