Tag Archives: hilarious
Journalist Rocky the Squirrel here –
Keeping my paws on the nuts of the world!
Friends – this is an awesome day – National Sandwich Day! Sandwiches are so varied in how you can make them – what bread, what meats, hot or cold, grilled, pressed, open or closed, condiments, toppings – sigh – let me slow down. The options are out there my friends. Do you know how the day got started?
English history says that John Montagu was the 4th Earl of Sandwich. He was a heavy gambler and would spend hours at the tables in London’s gambling halls. In 1762, he created the sandwich by putting meat between two pieces of bread. This allowed him to stay at the tables longer to gamble. Thus, the sandwich was made.
And do you know what Elvis Presley liked on his sandwiches? Peanut butter, banana and bacon (sorry Bacon) and then it was grilled. It does sound interesting in a round about way.
And do you have a Subway restaurant in your area? Today if you buy a sub and a 30 ounce drink, you get a free sub to share. Now that sounds like an awesome way to spend today.
Journalist Rocky the Squirrel here –
Keeping my paws on the nuts of the world!
Today, August 16th, is National Tell a Joke Day. YAY! Today should be filled with chuckles and laughs all around. Participate in this laughable day and tell some jokes. Do it in person, pass it along in a few emails or blog about it. The more jokes you tell today, the more fun today will be. Start the laughter and keep it flowing.
In honor of this day, Bacon has decided to tell a few jokes that he has heard. Get ready to laugh friends.
Joke 1 –
One of my neighbors owns several cats. On a recent visit, she introduced them to me. “That’s Astrophe, that’s Erpillar, that’s Aract and that’s Alogue.”
“Where on earth did you get such unusual names?” I asked
“Oh, those are their last names,” she explained. “Their first names are Cat.”
Joke 2 –
Why are sharks mostly salt water creatures?
– Because pepper would make them sneeze.
Joke 3 –
Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
– Because if they flew over the bay they’d be bagels.
Joke 4 –
What do you get when you cross a flower and a dog?
– A Collieflower (cauliflower) – snorts
Dear Bacon – Summer really stinks. It’s totally hot and uncomfortable. All I can do is stand in front of the fan and let the breeze overtake me. I just have to do something to cool me down. Signed Flappy
Dear Flappy – Hey pal, whatever you need to do to keep you cool I say go for it! Momma is a firm believer in her fan in this hot summer. Can’t we just skip over that season? I’m all for it. Let’s start a petition. What do you think?
Dear Bacon – Hubba hubba little man. I find you so fascinating. I can’t believe a pig like you is still single. What do you say we fix that problem? Signed I Do
Do Don’t – Not that I’m totally not appreciative or anything but I’m just not ready to settle down like that. You’re totally beautiful and I think you will find the perfect pig one day. Don’t give up my friend.
Dear Bacon – You talk about that Houdini at the Hotel Thompson a lot of different times. I just want you to know that I think I’m more spoiled than he is. My humans actually dress me up too. It’s a pain in the rump area but hey it makes them laugh. You ever think about dressing up? Signed Prissy
Dear Prissy – First off – you look adorable in your little outfit. Your face doesn’t *look* like you’re enjoying it but hey if the humans are happy, right? Second off – Houdini is a fussy little character. He is strictly a mommy’s boy and I just don’t see him letting me ‘dress’ him. I on the other hand let mom dress me up from time to time. Like you said, it makes the humans happy and smile. That’s our jobs!
Dear Bacon – Have you ever heard of the Red Hat Society? I’m a member and they have monthly meetings. I think you need to look it up in your area and do a posting on it. I think it would be fascinating. Signed Fun Times
Dear Fun Times – I’ll do that! I’ve heard mom talk about it with her friends. There’s also purple hats, right? 🙂 See, I do pay attention even though sometimes mom doesn’t think so. You wear that hat with pride and look forward to a posting in the future my friend.
Welcome my friends to another edition of Travels in the South. I know we usually show restaurant food but today we have something special. You see daddy loves M&M’s with nuts and mom loves caramel. Well somehow M&M nuts got mixed up with caramel and made this new creation – M&Ms Caramel. What a combination, right?!
So how are these new nuggets of wonder? Per daddy, they taste very similar to a Rolo. There is a great combination of chocolate to caramel and the nuts add another dimension. So if you like chocolate, caramel and nuts – look for these in your market the next time you go. They are definitely worth a try! And hey, get the big pack so you can share ❤
There are some things in life that you can never get too much of – like back rubs and cheese. Really think about it. Don’t those two things make you smile and feel good? Me too! Well recently mom and dad took nana out to lunch. Mom saw this on the restaurant menu and they all just *had* to try this wonderment. What is it you ask?
“Wisconsin cheese bites. Hand-battered and lightly fried to order. Served with a side of homemade marinara sauce“
Of course it’s going to be friend. We are in the south where we fry everything. But fried cheese bites. I’m licking my piggy lips now. See the gooey cheese on the picture coming out of the lightly battered bite? The cheese was wonderful and hot and so stringy! I’m not sure who enjoyed these more – mom, dad or Nana!
So the next time you see fried cheese on an appetizer list, try it. You might just fall in love too!
Dear Bacon – It is that time of the year to celebrate graduations. Here I am with my pup who just graduated from the top of his training class. I told him we would go out for Mexican and a little Samuel Adams for the pop if you know what I mean. These classes don’t come cheap. But only the best for my son. I told little Bubba that we would take a selfie to remember this moment forever. They are only young once and grow so fast. If I close my eyes, he might be driving next week! Signed Big Bubba.
Dear BB – Now that is so awesome my friend. What a way to celebrate the moment at paw. And you are right. The little tykes grow up so fast. At first I had a little rolling stone and now he travels so much I have no clue where he is this week – snorts with piggy laughter. Enjoy the little minutes friend!
Dear Bacon – There I was minding my own business playing in the hood. The master called me and I came willing. That’s when he started spelling words. Really? We can spell you know. Then I heard the letters to that God forsaken place – gulps – the V.E.T. I was like, “Whatcha talkin bout Willis?” Yep, I call my human by his first name when he says that three lettered bad word. As if anyone wants to go and get felt up by the V.E.T. Do your humans do this? Signed Arnold
Dear Arnold – The man has some nerve. Humans forget we are smart anipals for sure. Of course we can spell! We can do all kinds of things the humans don’t know about it when they are not looking. Of course, that’s a post for another day – snorts! I think you should ignore the human. Who really *needs* to go get felt up?… well maybe if there is a cute poodle involved and that is a strong maybe!
Dear Bacon – Do you ever wonder why the earth move sometimes? No not like around orbit or anything. I mean like you are in the house and you hear a huge bang or a rumble on the streets. It’s not what you think. You may *think* that it’s maybe a thunder storm or a big truck. Nope it’s not. It’s us Super Squirrels letting pooches know who really is in charge – us. This is a picture of me fixing to rock a dog’s world. Just imagine what the dog looked like when he saw me in mid-strike. HA! Signed Super Squirrel
Dear Super Squirrel – OMP! It all makes sense now. This is why Australia doesn’t have squirrels. Possibly – and I stress possibly – all the continents were united and you Super Squirrels took force like the Marvel comics and broke everything apart. Tell me my friend, am I on the right track? Try to keep your strikes down okay. We don’t need anymore continental drifts – snorts.
Dear Bacon – I don’t get it. I’m not amused. First up my human goes into hysterics when he looks at me and calls me Scooby. He is always offering me Scooby snacks and asking me if I’m ready for a mystery. The line was drawn when he got me this new collar. I think my human has went over the fine line of sanity. I really do. Can you help my human out? His name is Shaggy and he is even talking about taking me to something called DragonCon this year. What the heck is that? Barks – Scoob
Dear Scoob – Oh dude, your owner is just having a lot of fun for sure. I can see Scooby Doo in you. Scooby Doo is like a happening pooch that is great at solving mysteries and he even belongs to a gang. Of course the gang is called Mystery Inc. It’s not a bad thing at all my friend. And this DragonCon thing is a huge convention where you can meet so many new friends. Heck, you might even meet someone that looks like you. What a blast it would be. Maybe Houdini can come dressed as Scrappy? Look Scrappy up – it would be a blast!
Dear Bacon – Do you ever feel like you are being made the butt of all your staff’s jokes? My staff put these glasses on me and have not stopped laughing since. Heck, the mommy almost made water down her leg from laughing so hard. Who says that us anipals are the ‘kids’ these days. Really! Signed Googly
Dear Googly – Shaking my head. I understand completely. My humans are two of the biggest kids ever here in the south. I don’t trust them to leave the house by themselves. Trouble doesn’t find them. They find trouble. It’s so embarrassing. You just keep your eye on the situation my friend.
Welcome back my friends to another edition of Travels in the South. Last week, I gave you some appetizers from a restaurant that mom/dad visited a couple of towns over from us. You can read about that here. Today I wanted to share the main course with him. Now after eating all of those wonderful appetizers, mom did the right thing. She went for a salad. Mom said their salads were awesome with all kinds of the goodies that she likes in them like cucumbers, tomatoes, onion, mixed greens and croutons. Doesn’t it look fantastic?
But dad, dad went straight up southern on all of us. He got what the restaurant has on their menu as Glynn Street Burger. Why is it called that? Well the restaurant is on Glynn Street of course – snorts with piggy laughter. Makes sense huh? But what is in a Glynn Street Burger is the question. Let me introduce you.
The Glynn Street Burger is an 8 ounce hamburger patty topped with a fried green tomato, pimento cheese and -gulps- bacon. If you need to click on the picture to make it bigger to get a better look at this magnificent burger, please do. You will want to see all of this goodness. Dad says it’s one of those burgers that is wet and delicious. You will need plenty of napkins… or as mom says a hose to hose you down before you get back in the car. This burger is messy but so worth the fight in getting it into your tummy. If you never had a burger with pimento cheese and a fried green tomato – don’t knock it until you’ve tried it. Dad went straight up southern with this meal. But as in the famous words of our favorite television detective, “One more thing.” See those tater tots in the plate. They are sweet potato tater tots. Mom doesn’t care that much for tater tots but on this date couldn’t stay out of dad’s plate. They were that delicious!
But wait a minute, mom has one more picture to share with you. These are the outside doors of the bathrooms – too cute huh??!!
Friends, this is a great one today. I know – I know. I say that every week on my Travels in the South. But listen – every week I think there is absolutely no way that mom/dad can top the week’s prior Travels in the South. And every week, this little oinker is wrong. Right after mom’s accident (4 weeks ago today), she was feeling really icky and low. So dad treated her to this masterpiece. What is it you ask?
Daddy was speaking with the owner of a local restaurant that we go to a lot and was telling him that mom needed something to pick her up. The manager sent over this creation on the house. This is called Goo Goo Crunch pie. It has layers of chocolate fudge, peanut butter mousse and a nougat cream topped with caramel, chocolate sauce, fresh whipped cream and oh yeah – chopped up Goo Goo Clusters. Can you say insanely wicked good?! Daddy said that he could tell it was good. Not by the smile on mom’s face. Nope. Daddy said he could tell by the groans coming from mom. Oh my piggy heavens. Watch out Billy Crystal and Meg Ryan. Daddy said mom had you beat on this day – snorts with piggy laughter!