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Dear Bacon

   Dear Bacon – Oh dude!  What a game that Super Bowl was over the weekend.  OMD!  I dressed up in a disguise – you know like from the Super Bowl commercial – and was able to get a ticket to see football up front and personal.  Cats against horses – you know those Broncos were going to win – Go Peyton Manning!  What did you think of the game bro?  Signed Mr. Waddles

Dear Mr. Waddles – Love your disguise.  I can see how you got in to see the game in person.  And what a game it was!  I was sitting on the edge of my chaise the entire night rooting for the Broncos.  I’m not sure who was happier – me or dad when they won!  Heck, I jumped on the internet and went ahead and bought dad a Super Bowl 50 Bronco hat – of course with his credit card – snorts with piggy laughter.


Dear Bacon – Dude, you have never experienced life until you stretch out in a hammock and just relax the day away.  In fact, I think your humans should buy you a piggy hammock.  I bet you would enjoy it.  Signed Swinger

Dear Swinger – WOW – you do look really comfy there my friend.  I’m thinking that this Spring/Summer here at the Hotel Thompson, mom/dad might just need to get me a hammock for my magical backyard.  They can put it on the back deck so I can over look new discoveries.  Thanks for the heads up my friend.  Keep on swinging!


    Dear Bacon – I think I partied way too much during the Super Bowl game.  I remember eating some snacks.  I remember chugging some beer after playing beer pong.  That’s it.  Afterwards, the next morning I woke up with a cold one still in my paws.  Shaking my doggy head – I gotta quit partying like this.  Signed Born to be Wild

Dear Born to be Wild – Dude, when you stop remembering your actions from the night before, it’s way past time to stop drinking.  Just be lucky you didn’t wake up with someone else in your bed.  Oh my – can you imagine that?  Shaking my piggy head.  Safety first my friend.  You might need to reach out to DAA (Doggy Alcoholics Anonymous).  I’m sure they can help you.


Dear Bacon – OMD OMD OMD.  Sometimes this little red light laser thingy gets the cats going on here at my crib.  But tonight, that crazy red light kept popping up on the ceiling in my kitchen.  I couldn’t have that unidentified red light breaching my food.  So I did what any dog would do, I jumped up at it to catch and destroy the red light.  I must have caught it because it went away.  Have you ever seen this red light?  Signed White Dogs Can Jump

Dear White Dogs Can Jump – Look at you my friend!  I’d say you took care of that red dot.  I’ve seen it before too here at the Hotel Thompson.  It’s very mysterious when it shows up and then disappears for what seems like weeks.  Do you think it’s an alien trying to impersonate us anipals?  It’s so weird!


Dear Bacon –  A gal can only take so much from her man.  Mr. Endless Nagging kept going on and on about such nonsense – I couldn’t take it anymore and lost myself in the moment.  I don’t think he will bother me for a while – do you?  Signed That’ll Teach You

Dear That’ll Teach You – Heck woman – it taught me not to nag you – snorts with piggy laughter.  Whatever happened to if you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all?  Cause, trust me your man needs to learn that little tidbit of information.  And hey – you got a great right by the looks of it.


REMEMBER MY FRIENDS – Dear Bacon can’t happen without YOU.  Remember to send me your letters and pictures to my email.

 
18 Comments

Posted by on 02/09/2016 in Bacon, Dear Bacon

 

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Dear Tigerlino and Roxy – SPECIAL ISSUE

Greetings my dear friends!  This week, we have another great and wonderful guest helping us out with my Dear Bacon issue.  This week, my sweet friends Tigerlino and Roxy are stepping in for me to do a special edition of Dear Tigerlino and Roxy.  Be sure to visit them at their blog and check them out – let them know what a great job they did – thanks Tigerlino and Roxy!!

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Dear Tigerlino and Roxy,
Uh-oh. This doesn’t appear to be how the humans lay in this contraption. Sparky is underneath checking out what happened. Secretly I think he’s laughing at me. I jumped on top of this trickery and my legs continued south. Can you help a dog out? Signed Stuck

Dear Stuck,
um… we’re not sure what that thing is for but you’re absolutely right… that’s probably not how you use it. But hey, look on the bright side. If you get tired now, you won’t have to lie down to take a nap… you can just hang in there. And yes, it does look as if Sparky is secretely laughing at ya! But maybe you can get even by asking him to join you on that thing??? He won’t be laughing anymore once he’s stuck there too!  As for helping you out… we’re not sure what advice to give you. Hmmm… are you, by any chance, ticklish? Maybe if Sparky tickles your paws, you’ll jump up so high that you’ll fly right out of your trap? On second thought, that’s probably not the best idea. You’d probably fall right back down on that thing and get stuck again. But don’t despair, buddy… we’re trying to figure something out, okay? So just hang on…xoxo Tigerlino & Roxy

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Dear Tigerlino and Roxy,
Do you know what is more fun than rolling around in the mud? Of course it would be playing in a bundle of straw. I love hiding in the straw and then jumping out snorting to humans that pass my way. Some of them can jump pretty high. Have you ever done this? Signed Pop Goes the Piggy

Dear Pop Goes the Piggy,
We’ve never done this before but it sounds like a lot of fun! Do you think that works with dogs too? We’d love to give the neighbor’s dogs a fright. Do you think they can jump as high as the humans? Or even higher??? 😉  xoxo Tigerlino & Roxy

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Dear Tigerlino and Roxy,
Oh it’ll be fun he said. Just look over the edge at the crawly thing. You can’t possibly get hurt. Yep those were his last words before he pushed me over the edge like Humpty Dumpty. How can I get even. Can you help me out with that? Signed Too Close to the Edge

Dear Too Close to the Edge,
Why that little traitor! Let’s give him a taste of his own medicine. Why don’t you tell him that that crawly little thing was in fact a super yummy tuna treat and that you have found even more of them hidden in a mound?! And that you’d be happy to lend a helping *cough cough* pushing *cough cough* paw to explore the mound (housed by angry fire ants just waiting to take him on for disturbing their home…) How about that?! 😉  xoxo Roxy & Tigerlino

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Dear Tigerlino and Roxy,
Don’t you love my new shirt? You want one don’t you? Signed Bark Humor

Dear Bark Humor,
Oh My Gosh! Why are you not wearing any pants? Did the cat rip them apart? Or did you lose them in a poker game or something? But hey, don’t worry! If you smile big enough, no one will notice that you’re… um… nude… down there…  xoxo Roxy & Tigerlino

P.S. Where can we get one of those shirts???

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Dear Tigerlino and Roxy,
Meow. That should fix the humans for not giving me any snacks before they went to bed. Just wait until they go to potty now. Meow. Signed Payback

Dear Payback,
Yep, that’s purrfect… for a start. You could also shred the drapes, or the couch, or the carpet, or the wallpaper. And if the humans have a fit, tell them that you were just doing a little redecorating. Nothing wrong with that, right?  Oh, and you could also put a nice hairball on the human’s pillow…that’s pretty fun too! If you need more advice on how to get even with the humans, just let us know. Our „Get Even with the Humans Revenge List“ is endlessly long and getting longer as we speak…Have fun, sweetie! Meow!  xoxo Tigerlino & Roxy

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Remember friends – keep sending your letters/pictures to me at Baconthompson@gmail.com

We can’t do this without you!!

 
34 Comments

Posted by on 06/24/2014 in Dear Bacon

 

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