Bacon’s Tales of Terror

 Welcome my spooky friends to another edition of Bacon’s Tales of Terror.  They say that a picture can say a thousand words… sometimes eerie ones at that.  For instance, just sitting down to dinner can be interesting to say the least.  Talking about your day might sometimes not be with just your family.

Do you see anything in this picture?  How many ‘people’ do you see?  Three or maybe four?  The next time you sit down to the table, are you going to leave out a chair for someone that might want to visit… someone that miss their own family?

Oh and new friends to my blog.  This is just a taste of my 31 Days of Spook coming up in October.  Every day in October, I post something eerie and strange.  My Bacon’s Tales of Terror comes around every month on the 13th.

 

Not on My Watch

So today is the last full day that our guests are here.  That sucks.  I mean really it does.  We have all had such a fantastic time playing and laughing with them.  Last night we had a few friends over.

I lost my watch.  I know who would have thought that me as a pig would wear a watch but I do.  I gotta keep up with my social hour.  So at this party, I noticed my watch was gone.  Across the room, one of our guests had been drinking too much and I saw him starting to harass mom.  That’s when I noticed he was standing on my watch. The nerve of him.  I walked right up to him, snouted him in the chins and then hit him with my head knocking him over.  No one does that to my mom.  Not on my watch.  Snorts with piggy laughter.

 

Journey with Friends and Who Are the Secret Guests?

Welcome my friends to our weekly issue of Journey with Friends.  This is a time that we come together for support, for encouragement, for fellowship – all with one single goal in mind – to live better.  Welcome to our journey to share our goals and our accomplishments and our disappointments and frustrations.

Together we can do this!

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Hello sweet friends – How did you do last week?  I wore my imitation Fitbit 🙂 like a pro and recorded my steps everyday.  One day, I got up to almost 4,700 – awesome huh?  My goal right now is just 5,000 steps a day.  I’m building up to 10,000 and will probably increase it next month.

I’ve eaten really, REALLY light last week because you know we have our mysterious guests this week – happy dance.  So I wanted to make room to eat – anyone else do this?  Eat light one week when you know you are going to be having a blast in the upcoming week?

So I have to admit I’m going to be watching everything I eat this week…. as it goes in my mouth – snorts.  The DIEt is off for these days while our visitors are here but on the other hand we will be doing a lot of walking so that’s good, right?  And next week when everyone is gone 😦 , then we will be kicking it up a notch.

Hope your week goes well.  HUGS!

And can I get a drum roll?

They come from the land down under…

Fozziemom and Fozziedad!!!

 

We Got Mail!?

What?!  The postman came to our crib here at the Hotel Thompson.  We are *ALL* excited and jumping for joy.  The adventures will be out of this world!

Even the post man was excited.  The package was bigger than a shoe box – big enough that he couldn’t leave it in the mailbox – he had to actually bring it to the door.

What was it?  Oh do tell huh?  Well…. this pigs mouth is shut.  Why do I do this?  Evil snorts – because you’ll have to come back to my blog tomorrow to find out what it was. Maybe I’ll post a picture of it and everyone will be surprised and shocked as to what it is…. maybe 🙂

See you tomorrow my friends.

 

Come Closer – Go Ahead – Come Closer

Come closer my friends.  Mom is not home yet – she’s on the way so we have a few minutes to talk.  I’m in stealth mode, have my ninja outfit on and I’ve swept through the house.  Daddy is busy in the kitchen talking on the phone.  Mom is not here.  So I was thinking I could tell you who our secret guests are that will be visiting.  Now you can’t tell anyone okay.

Come closer… put your ear to the computer screen.

Okay, it is… what was that?!  That’s the doorbell.  I have to go my friends.  Talk to you later….

 

Dear Canadian Cat – Special Edition

September we are highlighting some of my friends who volunteered to help me out with my Dear Bacon issue. Today’s special edition is by my friends Kali and Shoko.  If you don’t know Kali and Shoko , you *must* go visit them and check them out on their blog The Canadian Cats.  Tell them that Bacon sent you.  Now, on to some great advice to help out our fellow anipals.

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Dear Canadian Cats,
Oh dear furry kitty heavens. What has been seen can not be unseen. I saw my humans naked…without a stitch of clothing. Why would they do that? Can you explain that to me? Signed Scarred for Life

Dear Scarred,
Land sakes alive.  The horror, the horror!  I hope the picture you sent is of you and you’re not a kit.  If, you were a kit, you’d need extensive therapy immediately.  As to why they would wander around without their coverings….who knows.  Hoomins are not known for their bashfulness.  Perhaps they were airing out their private parts like we do.  You would think they would lay down and stick their feet in the air if that were the case.  They could have been headed to the watering closet…they take their coverings off for this.  Very curious that they put on stinky coverings after getting clean.  I’m sure they weren’t trying to scare you though.  They just don’t realize how repulsive there bodies are to us.  I suggest in the future, you cover your eyes with your paws and RUN at the first glimpse of their naked bodies..  This is not safe but if you run into a wall your problem is solved.  When you come to you’ll wonder if all this was just a nightmare.  Good luck my friend.

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Dear Canadian Cats,
Water is the root of all evils my friends. Cats don’t need baths. We bathe ourselves. Why do the humans insist on dunking us – it’s like they want to baptist us. I don’t get it. Signed Walks on Water

Dear Walks on Water,
Water can be terrifying…especially when its not our idea to be anywhere near it.  Yikes!  I have a theory about hoomins sniffability and our own sensitive sniffer.  They are totally different.  When I am smelling beautiful and allow mom to get a whiff of my exciting scent…she says I stink.  How rude!!I’ll bet she wouldn’t like it if I took a sniff of her and ran away.  Wait!  I do that now.

Walks on, tell your mom how you feel and suggest dry shampoo. Your mom just brushes it in your fur and you’re good to go.  If, she still insists on baptizing you…then baptize her back again with lots of water.

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Dear Canadian Cats,
Trust me my friends. Never play in the kitchen when the humans are doing what they call cooking. The dropped a cup of something on me. Now I look like Casper. Help. Signed Cat Ghost

Dear Cat Ghost,
Hahaha….you look funny!  Lighten up Cat Ghost.  You still are cute as a button.  Let’s take a bad situation and turn it around.  This is the time to go “trick or treating”.  You’ll clean up….so to speak.

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Dear Canadian Cats,
Meow. What do I do for fun around the house? I strut around holding the dog treats in my mouth What? I look at it as helping the barky things out with their diet. Yeah. That’s it. Meow. Signed Dog Whisperer

Dear Dog Whisperer,
I like your style.  Up front and in everybody’s face.  My kind of friend.    However, the constant exposure of dog treats is positive reinforcement to your hoomin to get more treats for the dog not you.  This is not what you were aiming for.  So take those puporoni and stash them where no one will find them.  Grab a bag of your favourite treats and walk around the house.  It’s basic psychology my friend.  Now, get ready for lots of treats to come your way!

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Dear Canadian Cats,
Who says us kitties don’t get even. This will teach that dog to mess with me again. Don’t worry. I didn’t cut him. But I did take this picture to threaten him on future escapades. What do you think? Signed Corleone Cat

Dear Corleone Cat,
I’d say you made him an “offer he can’t refuse.”  Look at his eyes CC.  Anyone can tell, he’s learned his lesson well.  So, leave the knife and take his treats.  Put the knife somewhere handy though and let him know he’s padding a thin line.

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Remember my friends – Dear Bacon can’t happen without *you*.  Please continue to send your letters and questions to me here at the Hotel Thompson at baconthompson@gmail.com

 

Do *You* Have What it Takes?

Okay my friends – here’s your chance!  I get lots of snail mail and emails from anipals needing help desperately.  Heck, me and my mailman are now on a first name basis!

Are you patient?  Are you great at giving advice?  Do you have a warped sense of humor?  Do you often give out advice to your friends for free?

If so, this job is for YOU my friend. As you know, my weekly Dear Bacon issue comes out every Tuesday.  I am opening up my calendar for September 2014 for Special Guests to do my weekly issue.  That’s 5 weeks that are available on a first come first serve basis.

I will forward you my letters/pictures and all you have to do is answer the letters and return them back to me upon completion.  I will then give you a date that it will be published.  Sound like fun?

You’ve seen other guests step into my hooves and help me out with my weekly Dear Bacon issues.  Do you have what it takes?  Send me an email at baconthompson@gmail.com with your information and I’ll take it from there.  Hope to hear from you my friends!

NOTE:  This invitation is open to everyone whether you have already done an issue or you want to try your talents out for the first time and do one.