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31 Days of Spook – Story Submission

Hey my sweet friends.  Today, we have another guest story submission.  This one is from my friend Molly.  Do you know her?  If you don’t, you are so missing out on a very sweet and entertaining pup.  Please make it a point to visit my friend Molly – tell her that Bacon sent you.  Here’s her story submission – I hope you enjoy.  Try not to get too scared my friends 🙂

HALLOWEEN TALES FROM SPOOKY LONDON POND SQUARE

As it is ‘Shocktober, we thought today we’d bring you a story from bizarre spooky London. So heading off to Pond Square, Highgate we will recount the story of the ghostly chicken.

Sir Francis Bacon (1561-1626) was a politician, a writer and a philosopher who also dabbled in some well, unusual scientific experiments when he wasn’t hamming it up. He was a pioneer in the theory that refrigeration might be used as a means of preserving meat. On a bitterly cold January morning in 1626, Bacon decided to put his theory to the test by purchasing a chicken, having it slaughtered and plucked. He then proceeded to stuff its carcass with snow. Opps looks like this chicken just got a licking. Such a fowl way to die!  Ironically Sir Francis Bacon caught a severe chill as a result of his experiment and was taken to nearby Arundel House (a poultry excuse for a hospital) where he was placed in a damp bed and he died shortly afterwards from suffocation.

Ever since then, there have been frequent reports of a phantom bird, resembling a plucked chicken, that appears from nowhere and races round the square in frantic circles, flapping its wings and noiselessly clucking away. What is a haunted chicken called? A poultry-geist! Terence Long was crossing Pond Square late at night in 1943 when he heard the sound of horses hooves and the low rumble of carriage wheels. Suddenly, a loud raucous shriek, split the silence, and the ghostly chicken appeared before him. It then proceeded to run frantically around and then vanished into thin air. In the 1960’s a motorist whose car had broken down encountered the same apparition. Fearful that the bird may be harmed and in need of help he approached it, only to have it disappear when he turned away. A courting couple in the 1970’s, had their ‘peck’ on the cheek interrupted by the chicken who suddenly dropped from above landing next to them. In recent years, however, sighting of the featherless phantom have been few and far between and it might just be possible that its restless spirit has finally ’gone to the light, and accepted it’s part in the scientific breakthrough for which it gave its life. Cluck , cluck where did I pluck this from, is it a load of cock & bull I hear you say? Finger lickin good!

 
26 Comments

Posted by on 10/15/2014 in 31 Days of Spook, Bacon

 

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31 Days of Spook – Story Submission

BOO!

How are you making it my dear sweet friends.  Are you enjoying my 31 Days of Spook.  Are you getting scared yet?  Do you need to hold my hoof?  Today I have another great story submission by my pals Mop, Dusty, Billy, Pip, Cupcake and Cocoa.  Do you know these happy little guinea pigs from Living the Squeak Life?  If you don’t you are surely missing out on some entertainment and adventures.  Be sure to visit their blog – and tell them that Bacon sent you.

“Whee went on a little camp not too long ago and stayed in a grand old house once the home of an old Earl. It wasn’t long before whee learned that the hall had many creepy stories hanging over it, wheek! Now whee will share our tale with you. Mop, being our story-teller, will lead this story.

 I led my friends up the stairs. There were many grand stairs which led to a large room at the bottom. The perfect place for a wedding. I could already imagine the Bride-Pig coming down here from one side, meeting her father before descending down to meet the Groom-Pig at the bottom of the stairs.

Seemed I wasn’t the only one who thought this! For, what were the odds that on that very day there was a wedding?  A beautiful piggy in a gorgeous dress sat at the top of the stairs.

“Sorry!” I squeaked, filled with embarrassment. Pip was rather attracted to the pale grey sow but, I promptly reminded him that she was in a wedding dress. “I didn’t realize that there was a wedding here today.”

She promised that it was okay and so on whee carried. After exploring the hall whee headed back down to where our tour guide waited. “You didn’t tell us there was a wedding today!” Cupcake wheeked, ever the old romantic.

“There isn’t.” He replied.

Whee were horrified! Who was that whee had bumped into? A bit of research soon uncovered a creepy story about an unfaithful Bride-Pig who slept with another boar on the night before her wedding. In a rage the Groom-Pig killed her and she has wandered the halls ever since, looking for the wedding that never was. Is it her who whee saw? The Grey Piggy of the hall?”

 
23 Comments

Posted by on 10/10/2014 in 31 Days of Spook, Bacon

 

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31 Days of Spook – Story Submission

Hello my spooky friends.  I hope you have been having an awesome time so far this month on my 31 Days of Spook.  Today we have another story submission from my Auntie Sharon who lives in Australia.  You may know her better as gentlestitches.  Do you know her from down under?  If not, you are missing out on a wonderful friend.  Please be sure to check her out and tell her Bacon sent you.  Now for her tale of fright.

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“A change of pace from Australia today. No horrible apparitions, weird man eating beasts, no outback disappearances and definitely no disgruntled yowies or bunyips creating havoc and preying on innocent tourists. This is about a fair dinkum “healing house” in Sydney.

This otherwise normal house in Guilford has become known as a “House of Miracles” with people flocking to it’s doors and many reporting cures and relief from symptoms.

Apparently it all started a few weeks after the owners 17 year old son was tragically killed in an automobile accident in 2006. People report the walls of the house began dripping oil and the boys parents were convinced their son was communicating with them.

Since then there has been a lot of investigations,skepticism and people saying they have been healed. Apparently the Dad was involved in fraud charges at one time but I think “miracles are just as likely to happen to someone with a past as to someone with out one. The walls continue to “drip oil” and people continue to report miracles to this day. The owners of the house refuse to take any money.

What do you think: haven or hoax?”

 
20 Comments

Posted by on 10/09/2014 in 31 Days of Spook, Bacon

 

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Dear Easy – Special Edition

September we have been highlighting some of my friends who volunteered to help me out with my Dear Bacon issue. Today’s last special edition is by my brother Easy.  If you don’t know Easy, you *must* go visit him and check him out.  Tell them that Bacon sent you.  Now, on to some great advice to help out our fellow anipals.

 

 

 IMG_9425.JPGDear Easy,
Last night was great. My human dropped a pill on the floor. The next thing she knew, I ate it. I’m not sure what it was but I want more. I was so happy. So giggly. So alive! What do you think it was? Signed Feeling No Pain

Dear Feeling No Pain,
I bet it was a blue pill with a rhombic shape… they are the pills that lift anything up… really anything and anybody…. Those kind of pills you can buy when you check your spam folder. No worries that you could be fooled by a hoax, the offers start always with “Dear Friend…” and friends never fool you, right?

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Dear Easy,
I think we may be related. Can’t you see the resemblance? The eyes? The nose? Maybe the good looks? I think we may even be twins separated at birth. What do you think? Signed Mirror Image

Dear Mirror Image,
It seems you are really my twin… what’s sad, because I’m sick of my singleness… butt maybe that’s just the first impression and there is a chance that we are related butt not by blood? I can see some differences on your right ear and on your nose, what’s missing the scratch I wear . Please check your pedigree and call me immediately!

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Dear Easy,
I’m so pretty. I’m so fun. I’m so exciting on the farm. My human knitted my outfit for me and I love it! Don’t you? What size are you? I can get you one too so we can both have fun, fun, FUN! Signed Pretty in Pink

Dear Pretty in Pink,
Thanks that I have the chance to meet you. You must be the longlost twin of my mom. She wore exactly the same outfit like you, as they brought her home from hospital or wherever they found her.. Do you remember her? She just has no horn, butt probably hers grows inwards… Oh and btw: I’m a size XS…that means xtremely sloshed :o)

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Dear Easy,
They see me rolling and they’re hating. My pops bought me this get up and I highly recommend it. You want to know why? Because it attracts the ladies. What do you wear to attract the ladies? Signed Ladies Pup

Dear Ladies Pup,
You have a very wise Pops. He knows that all girls have a shoe-obsession and that a butt is a good butt in the perfect jeans. Oh and to wear sunglasses your way has something of James Dean, I agree. Girls love rebells, so they will open you their heart and their treat packs. I have to admit that I’m a professed nudist, but maybe that’s the reason that I’m still single?

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Dear Easy,
I got busted. Here’s the proof – thanks to my humans. During the day while they were at work, I got into the garbage can. I thought I was safe until this contraption got stuck on my head. Dude I couldn’t get it off. Any tips for my future escapades? Signed Lid of Shame

Dear Lid of Shame,
Your humans need a garbage can with an automatic lid, called Dive In in carnivore circles. That’s an essential equipment if they share their crib with a dog. Oh and I would remove that thingy before they come home… in worst case, next time they would save the money for a cone and try it with the lid of the treashure can…

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Thank you to all of my guests that helped me host my special editions for September.  Remember my friends – Dear Bacon can’t happen without *you*.  Please continue to send your letters and questions to me here at the Hotel Thompson at baconthompson@gmail.com

 
14 Comments

Posted by on 09/30/2014 in Bacon, Dear Bacon

 

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Dear Dezi – Special Edition

September we are highlighting some of my friends who volunteered to help me out with my Dear Bacon issue. Today’s special edition is by my sweet dear purr thing Dezi.  If you don’t know Dezi, you *must* go visit her and check her out.  Tell them that Bacon sent you.  Now, on to some great advice to help out our fellow anipals.

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Dear Dezi,
My humans forgot to bring me in for the night. Help! I don’t think they hear me or see me hanging on out here. What can I do? Has this ever happened to you? Signed Knock Knock

Dear Knock Knock,
Oh meez sweet furiend yous need new hoomans!!! But ifin yous gunna stay maybe yous oughtta we-fink goin’ outside or get yous hoomans to put in a cat flap. But fur now at least when yous do get inside again, leave them sum luvly hairball designs on their pillows and in their underwear drawer. Bet they don’t soon fur get that. Me made this hairball once that….oh yeah not da purrawlem. Anyways, don’t furget to steal da T.V. remote and giv it to da neighborhood dog.

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Dear Dezi,
I think I’m in trouble here. I got invited to the party. I just didn’t realize I was going to be the main attraction to the party. What am I suppose to do now. Little help here please. Signed Walking Dinner

Dear Walking Dinner,
Yous need to stawt investigatin’ yous dinner invitations and make suwe yous not da main course. After all, yous don’t have to accept evewy invite. Yous know this weminds me of da time….oh yeah, it’s not about me. As fur yous situation, it’s too late now, so just point them in da direction of da neawest golden arches and then stawt flappin’ those wings like nevew afur. Yous life just might depend on it.

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Dear Dezi,
Does the outfit make me look tough? My dad says I have the eye of the tiger but yet my mom says I float like a butterfly and sting like a bee. What do you think? Signed Upper Cut

Dear Upper Cut,
Yous do look tuff. Me wuld suwe want yous in meez corner.  Let me tell yous ‘bout….Aw nevew mind, yous worried ‘bout floatin’ like a butterfly and stingin’ like a bee. You know it’s not always looks dat count. There wuz a famous dude once dat floated like butterflies too. Hims wusn’t much to look at, but hims wuz like da heavy weight champ boxer of all time. So it looks like yous followin’ in da wight footsteps. Keep yous chin up and growl a bit, me finks hims did.

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Dear Dezi,
I’m ready for the beach. My flippers are on and I’m ready for some adventure. My favorite shows to watch on the nature channel show seahorses. Do you think I can blend in with them? Signed C.Horse

Dear C.Horse,
Yep yous got yous flippers on alwight. Let’s see…will yous fit in? Well these days yous wuld fit wight in most evewywhere so me dusn’t see why not. Yous might wanna check into an air tank tho’ meez not suwe yous lungs can take all at water. Yous know don’t ya’ dat male sea horses hav da babies? Is dat da kinda adventure yous lookin’ fur? Me dusn’t fink it works dat way ifin so. Yous might get luckier and find mowe adventure in da nearby pasture.

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Dear Dezi,
I don’t get it. Why are my humans laughing at me and taking pictures? Do you get it? If so, please explain to me. Please. Signed Jagger

Dear Jagger,
My what big teef yous hav.  And they be so white. Yous hoomans shuld be fankin’ their lucky staws yous not need dental work. But hoomans do hav a stwange sense of humor and always wiff da flashy box too.  Meez  mommy is always… ah hoo cawes. I fink yous vewy fotogenic and maybe sumday yous will be as pawpular as Lassie or Rin Tin Tin. Hoo ya’ fink’ll be laffin’ then. Yous dude while yous head on down to da local piercin’ shop and buy yous self a 24 kt. gold gwill.

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Remember my friends – Dear Bacon can’t happen without *you*.  Please continue to send your letters and questions to me here at the Hotel Thompson at baconthompson@gmail.com

 
34 Comments

Posted by on 09/16/2014 in Bacon, Dear Bacon

 

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Dear Archie, Oscar and Henry – Special Edition

September we are highlighting some of my friends who volunteered to help me out with my Dear Bacon issue. Today’s special edition is by some wonderful little purr thing friends – Archie, Oscar and Henry. You know them from their blog – mythreemoggies  If you don’t know them, you *must* go visit them and check them out.  Tell them that Bacon sent you.  Now, on to some great advice to help out our fellow anipals.

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Dear Dear Archie, Oscar and Henry,
My mom said that if I behaved at the flea market, I could ride the merry go round. Bark-bark-bark. As you can see, I got to ride! Bark – it’s so much fun. Bark – can you tell I’m having fun? Signed Happy Bark

Dear Happy Bark,
It looks like you’re going round the twist. You’re barking mad. You can’t carousel on like this!
We know you dogs like to go a little crazy every now and then: chasing your tails, running after sticks, barking at the wind. But this is too much.
You need to be a little more cat… Quit the fairground, find yourself a nice warm bed and grab forty winks. That’s true happiness.
Signed Archie, Oscar and Henry

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Dear Archie, Oscar and Henry,
What the cream cheese! There’s something slimy that confronted me today in my own living room. What the heck is the cast off from Sponge Bob? Have you ever seen this before. I’m not sure what I do with it – play with it, eat it or show it to the door. Thoughts? Signed Escardog

Dear Escardog,

This is a slimy situation you’ve got yourself into. Of course, your first resort to any intruder is to think ‘food’, but this is not Paris notre petit ami. You need to have a word in his shell like and tell him to sling his antennae.

Signed Archie, Oscar and Henry

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Dear Archie, Oscar and Henry
What!? Haven’t you ever seen a dog turning in for the night? I have to get a good nights sleep so I’m in shape to chase the mailman in the morning. It’s what I do. Come on now – you can admit to me that you sleep like this too. Signed Napdog

Dear Napdog,
This is what we’re meowing about. Sleep like a king our friend!
The importance of a good kip isn’t lost any self respecting moggie, and it’s a relief to see our canine pals finally embracing the power of slumber.  After all, that mailman won’t chase himself.
Signed Archie, Oscar and Henry

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Dear Archie, Oscar and Henry
Ha! I’m the littlest on the farm. The other animals like to horse around and bully me. I do what I do best. I sneak behind the trees and stick my tongue at them. When they chase me, the humans catch them picking on me. What!? Like you’ve never done that before? Signed Horse N Round

Dear Horse N Round,
This is neigh way to behave!
You need to stand up to yourself – are you a horse or a mouse?
Us moggies were brought up on da streets, and the rule there is you never grass. Actually, the rule is you eat the grass but whose letter is this anyway?
Signed Archie, Oscar and Henry

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Dear Archie, Oscar and Henry
Hey guys. I need your help. I’m a traveling door to door salesman. For some reason, when I ring door bells no one answers. I don’t get it. Can you help me out? Signed Gator Calling

Dear Gator Calling,
You have an image problem. Smarten yourself up, employ a make over artist and get yourself a nice suit.
These gator-phobes won’t change their attitude unless you make the first move.
Oh, and make it snappy!
Signed Archie, Oscar and Henry

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Remember my friends – Dear Bacon can’t happen without *you*.  Please continue to send your letters and questions to me here at the Hotel Thompson at baconthompson@gmail.com

 
39 Comments

Posted by on 09/09/2014 in Bacon, Dear Bacon

 

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Dear Wallace and Samuel – Special Edition

September we are highlighting some of my friends who volunteered to help me out with my Dear Bacon issue. Today’s special edition is by two cute adorable little Scottie brothers – Wallace and Samuel.  If you don’t know Wallace and Samuel, you *must* go visit them and check them out.  Tell them that Bacon sent you.  Now, on to some great advice to help out our fellow anipals.

IMG_0041.JPGDear Wallace and Samuel,
Help. We have some really nosey and crazy neighbors. They are always trying to find out what is going on in my crib. Today I saw them looking into my window. I thought I would teach them a lesson and let them know what I thought about them. It’s amazing what a good stretch in the direction can tell them. Meow. Any more ideas? Signed Tails Up.

Dear Tails Up,
If your Peeping Tom neighbours don’t get the message after that eyeful of booty we suggest kicking it up a notch, how about treating them to a fine feline operatic performance at say 2am? Alternatively, nothing says “back off” quite like a week old dead mouse bouquet. If all else fails we recommend a good old restraining order.  Good luck!  Wally & Sammy

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Dear Wallace and Samuel,
I.hate.baths. Can I say that any louder? Can I express that any louder in this picture? Get it over already and baptize me so I can get out of this tub of water. What do you suggest I think about during this torture? Signed Water Logged

Dear Water Logged,
Samuel here – I hear you loud and clear buddy! I too am not a lover of water or baths or baths filled with water. Based on personal experience I suggest you focus on the one of the following: a) the fun towel rub down you’ll get when the water torture is over OR 2) the fun you will have shaking all that water off you and onto your peep *snicker snicker* OR c) the fun you’re going to have rolling in something REALLY stinky first chance you get.  Happy daydreaming!  Sammy (and Wally)

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Dear Wallace and Samuel,
My mom says that everyone has a beauty mark somewhere on their body. Mine just happens to be on my snout an looks like a heart. Do you see it? What kind of beauty mark do you have? Signed Heart of Snouts

Dear Heart of Snouts,
How frickin’ adorable are you!!  We got mom to do a full body search of both of us looking for our beauty marks and you know what…she couldn’t find one!! Not one!! We’re not going to lie, this worries us a little and we’ve asked mom to make us an appointment at the tattoo parlor asap so that we can have one made – for some reason she is dragging her paws about making the appointment. We hope we can still be friends…even though we are beauty markless.  Wally & Sammy

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Dear Wallace and Samuel,
I’m sending you this picture for evidence. It was the last selfie that I took when the boys were chasing me. What? Wouldn’t you have done the same thing? Bad barks are chasing you and you take a selfie with the cell phone? What can I do to make the bad barks quit chasing me? They didn’t catch me this date. I ran into a log that they couldn’t get into. Can you help me out? Signed Faster than Pooches

Dear Faster than Pooches
This is an easy one…STOP TAKING SELFIES!! Seriously dude, put the phone down and walk away. We guarantee you those pooches won’t even sniff you twice if you get rid of the phone and start behaving like an ordinary cat. Nobuddy likes a show off especially a show off who needs to document his every move, meal and meow.  Embrace living off the grid.  Wally & Sammy

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Dear Wallace and Samuel,
I don’t get it. I jumped in this box. My human dad took a pen and did something to the front. Afterward he was laughing hysterically. I don’t get it. Can you help me out? Signed Bat Cat

Dear Bat Cat
What can we say, small things amuse small (hooman) minds. We can see what effect your dad was going for here butt unfortunately it is lost as soon as you climb out of the box. We recommend pushing the box to the nearest mirror…it will all make sense then.  And remember: Always be yourself! Unless you can be Batman cat, then always be Batmancat.  And remember: Always be yourself! Unless you can be Batman cat, then always be Batmancat.

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Remember my friends – Dear Bacon can’t happen without *you*.  Please continue to send your letters and questions to me here at the Hotel Thompson at baconthompson@gmail.com

 
47 Comments

Posted by on 09/02/2014 in Bacon, Dear Bacon

 

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