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Dear Bacon – Special Edition

Tis the season to be merry my friends!  Today, we have a very special issue of Dear Bacon.  I bet a lot of you know my special friend.  He’s been hanging (literally) around my house since Thanksgiving.  For those that don’t know him, I’ll tell you a little back ground.

The Elf on the Shelf: A Christmas Tradition came out in 2005 in a children’s book.  The little Elf that comes with the book has a job between Thanksgiving and Christmas Eve.  His main job is to watch over the household and report back to the North Pole nightly on if the people are naughty or nice.  He comes back to the household by morning.  There’s one important thing about the Elf.  You don’t touch him as doing so will erase any Christmas magic that has been blessed upon him.  Every morning that he comes back from the North Pole, people in the household find him in different places.  But remember, it’s all magic!

So in honor of Christmas, we have the Thompson Elf – Don Juan – representing in the Dear Bacon issue.  We hope you enjoy.  XOXO – Bacon

Dear Don Juan,

You’re a fellow Elf.  You know times are hard working for the fat guy.  We work once a year.  It’s hard to make a living like this.  Sometimes we gotta do what we gotta do, right?  Signed Elf Burglar

Dear Elf Burglar,

Step.away.from.the.pig.  Don’t make me call the Elf Union.  Elves do not steal in the houses that we are to watch over.  Your special Christmas powers can be revoked with a snap of a finger.  You know there are other jobs you can work while in the off season.  I’ve heard Walmart is looking for door greeters.  Or perhaps you can join a traveling circus during down times.  Anything but stealing my fellow Elf.

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Dear Don Juan,

Last night, the humans they stayed up until the whee hours of the morning making cookies.  I just thought I would make my mark.  You like?  Signed Droopy

Dear Droopy,

I like and I approve.  This is what I’m talking about.  Good little elves help out around the house not steal.  Way to go my friend!

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Dear Don Juan,

I’ve read on Bacon’s blog that his human father likes to play Angry Birds.  Well, I thought I would share this photo for you to take notes on future escapades.  Enjoy my friend.  Signed Angry Elf

Dear Angry Elf,

That’s what I’m talking about!  Thanks for the idea.  I definitely will pursue this one tonight.. perhaps 🙂

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Dear Don Juan,

When you have to go, you gotta go.  The humans, they caught a picture of me in mid dunk.  Thank goodness I was holding on and the humans didn’t see me in action.  Signed Pepper Elf

Dear Pepper Elf,

Hey, you’re right.  It’s nature.  It’s part of life.  At least you’re potty trained.  Tis the season for magic in all forms.

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Dear Don Juan,

What?  We get kind of bored at night staying up all by ourselves.  Sometimes we get back from reporting in at the the North Pole early. We gotta do something in our spare time for just us.  I met this chick named Frankie Stein from Monster High.  Dude, she has some moves!  Signed Pole Elf

Dear Pole Elf,

Oh dear.  This can’t be good.  Where did you get that money?  And dear Lord, you’re sitting on baby food.  There’s a baby in the house.  Step away from the pole and tell Ms. Stein to put on some clothing.  Shakes head.. I may need to investigate this further.  Can you email me Ms. Stein’s telephone number?  You know, for my paperwork.

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Dear Don Juan,

It’s just a little nick and tuck.  What can I say?  He was on the naughty list.  I had to do something to snap him into reality that this is the Christmas season.  Thoughts?  Signed Barber Elf

Dear Barber Elf,

Are you insane?!  We can’t do that.  That poor fellow is going to be scared for life.  Listen here you young Elf, report back to the North Pole ASAP.  I’ve gotta get this taken care of with the humans.  Where’s is that Easter bunny when you need him?

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Dear blogville,  I hope you enjoyed this special of Dear Bacon – Elf on the Shelf.  Remember, tonight is the big night.  Make sure you’re extra good and leave out cookies.  I’ve heard Santa likes chocolate chip and macadamia.  Well, that’s what my human daddy tells me.  XOXO – Bacon

Note:  Pictures were sent in by friends of mom who emailed them to me with questions.

 
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Posted by on 12/24/2013 in Dear Bacon

 

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