Friends Outside of Facebook

You know my friends I do everything I can to find exciting and outrageous information for you from the internet.  This is one of those times.  Finding friends outside of Facebook – here you go – enjoy 🙂 

 

Dear Bacon

Dear Bacon – One good thing about having small humans around the house, they have the neatest toys.  Take for instance this cute little rocking chair.  Of course, the little human has it for her so called dolls but I fit perfect in it.  And you know what they say, “If it fits, you must sits”.  Barks!  Do you sit in chairs?  Signed Rocker Doggy

Dear Rocker Doggy – That is totally cute pal.  I have been known to sit in chairs.  And don’t let humans fool you.  Us piggies we can climb.  I once climbed the kitchen chair to get in the seat.  Of course, I had an extra motive to do so.  There was a bag of kitty chow in it and I wanted some food – snorts.  So yeah little buddy, I have sat in a chair but I looked nothing as adorable as you!

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Dear Bacon – There is *always* that one friend of yours that does not know the word boundaries.  Here I was acting all cute and the master was going to take my picture.  It’s not bad enough that darn pooch photo bombed me but he has to hug me and lick me… eeww doggie cooties at its finest.  Now I’m infected with dog gross.  This is going to require many, MANY hours of grooming.  Please make him stop and go away.  Hey, I got an idea.  Can I mail him to you?  You already have a semi-zoo going on there at the Hotel Thompson.  They wouldn’t notice one more, would they?  Signed Kitty Cooties

Dear Kitty Cooties – Oh dear piggy heavens.  That is one hilarious picture.  Just remember my friend, I’m not laughing AT you.  Not at all.  I’m laughing at the situation.  It seems to me that you got a great pal there with that doggy.  Have you thought about that?  I bet he is so protective of you that it isn’t funny.  Just think that this could be productive and come in handy in the future of anyone picking on you.  He could lick them and infect them with cute cooties.  And hey, the zoo is now full here.  Daddy has said so.  There are more anipals than humans and we rule the roost… we just let daddy think that he does – snorts and good luck!

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Dear Bacon –  It is gotten bad that a bun-bun has to do their own shopping now out in the neighborhood.  That’s okay though.  I take my little buggy and I hit the nearest garden for my collecting of tasty carrots.  They are so delicious!  I get enough to fill the buggy, go back home and hide them in my cage.  Hey – it’s what I do.  Do you like carrots too?  Signed Shopping Bun

Dear Shopping Bun – Do I like carrots?  That’s like saying, “Do you like to breathe?”  I absolutely ❤ carrots.  They are one of my favorite veggies in the entire world.  I snack on them throughout the day – small ones, big ones, orange ones, yellow ones – all of them are tasty to me.  And hey, if you are shopping on your own in the neighborhood gardens, just think of the other tasty morsels you can find too.  If you come across watermelon, let me know.  That’s my number 2 favorite food 🙂  Happy shopping!

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Dear Bacon – Say it with me now when I hit the key, “mmmm”.  I’m practicing the Meow Mix song so I can be in the next commercial.  Do you think I have a chance?  Signed Kitty Tune

Dear Kitty Tune – I say go for it my friend.  What do you have to lose?  I say if that doesn’t work out for you, try America’s Got Talent or American Idol.  And if they don’t work out remember this.  YOU are always a winner in my book.  Look at you tickling those ivories.  You go play my friend and have a blast doing it.

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FRIENDS – Please remember that Dear Bacon can’t happen without YOU.  Please email me your pictures and letters 🙂

 

Dear Sammy – Special Edition

Today, we have a very special Dear Bacon issue – it’s called Dear Sammy. My cousin Sammy is going to fill in for me today and do his own edition. Be sure to go visit Sammy when you get a chance and tell him what a great job he did. Thanks cousin!!

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Dear Sammy,

This is what I’m talking about. See, I’m so tough that the big kitties act like I’m not even there. They don’t mess with me, even when I growl at them. Can you control big cats too? Signed Ferocious Kitty

Dear Ferocious Kitty

I think you are obviously handling the big kitty situation at your house just fine. I can tell by the way those big cats are walking right by and NOT looking at you that they are truly intimidated by your presence. They hear your growl of warning and just keep on walking. You are destined for greatness – they already made the “The Lion King” but I’m thinking perhaps you could star in “The Ginger and White King”? Can I be your agent?.

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Dear Sammy,

There’s nothing to see here. Really. I’m just massaging the dogs face. Yep. That’s it. Really. Signed Face Stomper

Dear Face Stomper

I’m not sure if that dog is so drugged up from whatever operation he had that caused him to have to wear the Cone of Shame that he doesn’t FEEL you there or if you truly are performing some kind of facial massage. But he doesn’t seem to mind either way so I say GO FOR IT. I’ve never been *that* close to a woofie before but ‘more power to ya’ is what I say.

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Dear Sammy,
Help. I’ve been mugged. The humans here have such a whacky sense of humor. What am I to do? Signed Puppy Mugged

Dear Puppy Mugged,

If I was in a bar (which I’m not) and I ordered a brewski (which I wouldn’t) and they served me with a mug full of adorable puppy like you, I’d be pretty darn happy (as long as I could train you to meow instead of bark of course). However, I would NOT leave the barmaid a tip. When a guy orders a brewski, he does not expect it to have eyes looking back at him!

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Dear Sammy,
Oh dear Lord. I am not a chia dog. The humans found this get up and took advantage of it. Help. Please. Signed Chi-Chia Dog

Dear Chi-Chia Dog

After I finally stopped laughing, I realized the only way to improve on this outfit would be if your humans had put orange sneakers on your feet… the non-clay-colored feet ruin the effect! I think your humans are si-si-si-silly!

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Dear Sammy,
Look closer. To the left. Down a bit. There you go. Signed #1 Hide and Go Seek

 

Dear #1 Hide and Go Seek

This is totally CUTE… but the more I thought about it the more I realized why it sort of creeped me out too… why? Because it almost looks like your little head is coming OUT of that bear’s belly (think “Alien”)!!! See what I mean? EEEEEEKKKK!!

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Remember friends – send your pictures and questions to me at Baconthompson@gmail.com – thanks so much!