Dear Bacon, Going undercover these days is a hard job. I thought I would go inconcheeto. It seem to be working too. That is until I got hungry and ate my disguise. Drats. Busted again. You ever go undercover? Signed Inconcheeto
Dear Inconcheeto, I’m sorry. What was the question? I saw your disguise and immediately got the munchies. Snorts. Oh that’s right, do I ever go undercover? Sure. When I go to sleep in my toddle bed at night. Double snorts and rolls with laughter. Keep practicing my friend. You are looking good.
Dear Bacon, I’m a great hunter. I go out deer hunting with my master all of the time. I’m very determined and can smell a deer a mile away. Nothing slows me down ever as you can tell from this great picture of me. Signed Nose to the Ground
Dear Nose to the Ground, Perhaps – and this is just a mere suggestion – you might want to look up and around every once in a while. I’m just saying. You might see a little more of your “environment” when you do. Snorts – carry on.
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Dear Bacon? Really? My human finds me in this predicament. Does he help? Of course not. Oh no. The human has to snap a few pictures first before rescuing me. Really? What the kitty heavens is this world coming to? Signed Disgusted Kitty
Dear Disgusted Kitty, There is only one thing that I can say in this kind of situation – payback. I think some well placed fur balls in some slippers would be adequate. Happy pay back 🙂
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Dear Bacon, Okay ladies. Here I am. I’m giving away free kisses. Whatcha think pig? Can you beat this? Signed Stud
Dear Stud, That’s quite the costume you have there friend. Don’t you worry. I can get all the ladies I want and I don’t need a costume. All I need is this cute little snout and sexy pot belly. Beat that – snorts.
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Dear Bacon, I think I may need some help. I read how your dad looks at you with this hunger. I think my dad is doing the same thing with me. Can you help? Signed Spud
Dear Spud, Oh dear piggy heavens above. Okay my friend. First off, walk away from the ledge in which you stand and get to a safe place. I’m calling DDFS (Department of Dog and Family Services) right now. Be safe.
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Remember my friends – keep the letters and pictures coming so we can continue Dear Bacon issues.