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Tag Archives: fast food

The Most Useless Utensil

It’s flimsy.  It bends when you don’t want it to bend.  It breaks when you don’t want it to break.  It’s not a spoon.  It’s not a fork.  Do you stab your food?  Do you scoop your food?  t’s made by the devil himself.  The spork.

They serve the spork in a lot of fast food restaurants.  Can you tell me how you eat chicken with it?  Can you tell me how you eat a salad with it?  It can’t stab your salad the way a fork would.  Why oh why is there a spork?

 
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Posted by on 06/16/2016 in Bacon

 

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Oh My Piggy Heavens – The Size of THAT!

20140112-010108.jpgThere we were putting around town last night with me in the back of mom’s Jeep and look what I saw out my window – the biggest chicken evah!  I started squealing and was like, “Give it to me mom – give it to me.”  Of course my insistent annoying snorting gentle persuasion got mom to hit the drive thru for some chicken nuggets for all of us.

Can I say yum?  Of course, I wanted the big chicken on the building but mom explained you couldn’t eat that guy.  Wouldn’t it be awesome though?  I could just see me in piggy heavens afterwards if he really was a chicken… mmmm …

I may need a nap just thinking about that my friends.

Happy Hump Day!

 
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Posted by on 03/09/2016 in Bacon

 

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Texts from Bacon

Sometimes you just get hungry.  What can this oinker say?  I have to maintain this gorgeous pot belly somehow – right?  My posts are white and moms are green this time.  Enjoy –

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Posted by on 11/14/2014 in Bacon

 

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Bacons Tale of Terror

 

 

Hello my friends – Count Baconula here for Bacons Tale of Terror – on today January 13th.  Today is another true story. Not the kind involving ghosts or paranormal.  This story is something more.  Something that will scare you and make your hair turn white.  Something that will have you screaming like a little baby.

You see, last weekend mom let me go with her to pick up some take out at a local fast food restaurant.  I do that sometimes and I enjoy it.  I mean who wouldn’t, right?  How would you feel if you were working the window and a little itty bitty Smart car pulled up to pick up the food that had a cute adorable little oinker in the backseat?  Right?  Some times the wonderful workers will give me snacks – 🙂 It’s good being me sometimes.

Well this day was like any other.  We went to Krystals which is like heaven on earth to me and daddy.  Little hamburgers shaped square with wonderful stuff in them.  And yeah, the cute little cashier gave me one to eat in the back seat as she watched.  I’m sure there’s a name for that – snorts.

Everything was fine and dandy.  We are scooting on back to the home with all of our goodies in tow when we stopped at a red light.  This gave me time to stand, stretch and stick my tongue look around outside. Everything was going fine until I saw *IT*.  I squealed – pretty loud actually.  The only thing I could do was raise my hoof holding my camera phone and snap a picture.

OMP (Oh my pig!)  Do you see what was in this car window?  For real?  That is scarier than any ghosts my friend.  That shook me down to my little hooves and all I could do was shiver and shake.  Mommy looked back to see what was wrong with me and then she saw it.  Awful sight this car was.  Who would drive around with that evil looking Bozo in the car.  Please tell me that.  Wouldn’t you be afraid too my friends?

 

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Posted by on 01/13/2014 in Bacons Tales of Terror

 

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