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Dear Bacon

Dear Bacon – I’ve made a grave mistake here.  I thought I could jump over the little seat thing that kids swing on… I really did.  I jumped and mean old Mr. Gravity said, “Nope, not today”.  I really hate that guy.  So I guess you can say I’m stuck between a swing and hard place.. .namely the ground.  Any suggestions cause apparently my human who thinks it is hilarious is too busy taking my picture to lend me a paw.  Crazy human.  Signed Swinger

Dear Swinger – You know that’s the problem these days.  When anything happens, humans want to pull out their cell phones and take videos or pictures instead of lending a helping hand.  I don’t get it?  Burning car on the highway – no problems let me video tape it first before checking for survivors.  House on fire – oh yeah this will be good on my Facebook before putting the fire out.  Dog caught with his kibbles and bits up in the air – no worries.  Let’s get this picture first before the pooch passes out or by all means gets unlatched himself.  I definitely feel you my friend.  Can you bounce up with your front paws to get your back paws back on the ground and then wiggle out from that contraption?  Let me know if I need to call someone…. I’m hoping you are free like the wind now 🙂


Dear Bacon – I *know* I saw that darned squirrel on this tree.  I know I did.  He was running around on the ground taunting me.  I know he’s here somewhere.  If you see him, let me know okay.  Signed Hunter

Dear Hunter – Oh my friend, I’ve seen him alright.  He’s a sneaky sly little fellow.  I would go as far as to say that he has skills of unnatural means.  Put your paws down on the ground silently.  Now just as silently and be careful of the crunch of the leaves, slowly walk around the trunk of that massive tree.  Quiet now.  You don’t want to scare the little fellow.  You may find him around on the other side watching you… waiting for you to leave.  Smart little guy huh?  Enjoy playing tag my friend.


Dear Bacon – I don’t get it.  I found this wonderful food on the ground.  It’s awesome!  So much chocolate.  There I was sitting in my tree enjoying it.  That’s when the weird stuff happened that I don’t get.  My friends kept walking by and saying, “Georgia eat a Snickers bar.  You know you’re not you when you’re hungry”.  Shakes head in confusion.  I don’t get it.  Do you?  Between you and me though, that Snickers bar did hit the spot.  Signed George

Dear George – Snorts with piggy laughter.  You don’t watch television much do you my friend?  You see there were some wonderful Snickers commercials out some time ago that had the saying, “You’re not you when you’re hungry”.  Okay, maybe the better thing to do here is to show you one of them…. one of my favorites.  Then it will ALL make sense.  Enjoy my friend.


Dear Bacon – I think the purr things here are pranking me.  They said they had a surprise for me.  They then told me I had to put my paws over my eyes and stay that way until they came back.  That was three days ago.  Do you think it’s save to go to the bathroom.  I really, REALLY need to go now?  Signed Waiting

Dear Waiting – Shakes head.  Oh my friend.  Don’t you know yet that purr things are horrific for doing such things to us?  The two here try to do these things to me as well.  But I don’t fall for it.  You can never trust a purr thing – sorry my cat friends.  But you know it’s true to.  Ya’ll are beyond devious and you have so much training from years and years of taking care of yourselves.  I bow down to you.  I really do.  So why don’t ya’ll do all of us a favor and leave us alone.  And Waiting – by all means go to the potty before you explode like a balloon.


Dear Bacon – My humans are wickedly bad at this torture.  They really are.  There we were watching some superheros on our television.  I was minding my own business and just enjoying the company on the couch.  My dad said that all superheros need a mask.  He was eating a sandwich so well you can see what he did.  Why?  That’s all I really need to say, right?  Why?  Signed Masked Bandit

Dear Masked Bandit – Oh my friend.  You have to give your dad something on creativity.  And you have to admit that it is pretty cute.  No one would ever guess that’s you behind the bread.  Nope not at all!

 

 


REMEMBER friends.  Dear Bacon can’t happen without YOU.  Please continue to send me your pictures and questions via email.

 

 
23 Comments

Posted by on 08/11/2015 in Bacon, Dear Bacon

 

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Squeals – Guess Who Called!

So there we were this past Saturday all of us bundled in the living room watching the clock intensely.  We were expecting a long distance call from someone here in blogville.  Someone that we have talked to verbally by type, sent packages to back/forth and even talked to them on Facebook.  But we had never talked in person via the phone.  Emails were sent back and forth and the magical time was set for 2:30 pm our time which would make it 8:30 pm their time.  That’s right, they are SIX hours ahead of us.

Then it happened.  The phone rang.  We all jumped of course because we were concentrating on the phone and clock.  Mom answered the phone and put it on speaker.

Mom – “Hello”

Friend in blogville – “Hello is this the Hotel Thompson?”

Score – jumps for joy.  It is our friend and not a solicitor or robo call – snorts.  I know – I know.  You’re asking who was the caller.  It was – are you ready for this – my brother Easy from France!  We were ALL so excited.  We got to talk to Easy’s dad and had such a blast!  Mom was so excited that she got to talk to a real Frenchman – hubba hubba.  It was an awesome time full of fact changing and getting to know each other and ask questions that we’ve always wanted to.  And talk about accents.  WOW!  It was great.

One never knows who might reach out from across the telephone lines in the future.  Thanks Easy for calling this oinker.  We had the best of time!  I know it’s greedy to say but we can’t wait to do it again!

 
25 Comments

Posted by on 07/20/2015 in Bacon

 

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Dear Bacon

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Dear Bacon – There is *always* that one friend.  You know the one that ‘dares’ you to do something and says, “What are you afraid”?  Why did I have to fall for it.  Can you tell me that?  And then if that wasn’t bad enough, Ethel has to then photobomb me and take a picture for her Facebook account.  Dude, I long for the days before all of this social media.  Signed Jack

Dear Jack – WOW.  I see that you are in a predicament my friend.  I don’t even know Ethel dared you to do but the how the heck did you get out of that funky position?  Of course, for payback and before she photobombed you all you had to do was lift that left leg in a strategic position and that would smack that smirk right off of her face – snorts.  You know friend, this just screams for payback.  And make it GOOD.  I mean really GOOD.  And then post it on your Facebook account… or perhaps get Christmas cards made.  Now that sounds like a plan of destruction.  Keep me posted with the results and don’t take any more dares anytime soon okay.


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Dear Bacon – HA!  This will teach my humans.  I ran away from home and they have yet to find me.  What do you think?  Am I the master of disguises or what?  Signed Hide N Seek Master

Dear Hide N Seek Master – You are the boss my friend.  I had to take several looks myself to see which ‘rock’ was you.  And your parents haven’t found you yet.  That’s so awesome.  Just remember to come out in time for dinner okay.


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Dear Bacon – They said I could do and be anything I wanted.  So I decided I wanted to water ski.  And let me tell you something – it is fantastic!  So invigorating.  It makes me feel like I weigh nothing at all.  I highly recommend it my friend.  Signed Weightless

Dear Weightless – You know you have my interest piqued now my friend.  I think I may try this soon… especially since mom/dad are sending me to this awful thing called C.A.M.P.  Stay safe.


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Dear Bacon – Have you ever just had one of those days that you needed a little something to take the edge off?  This was me last weekend.  I just couldn’t take chasing the postman anymore… or tying up and blaming the cat for everything.  I needed a little liquid refreshment in a place where everyone knew my name and it was a fun place.  And hey, this wine is awesome.  Have you ever felt like this?  Signed Stud at the Bar

Dear Stud at the Bar – Oh yes indeed.  There are days that I feel the world is overcoming me… especially this past weekend.  We could have met up my friend.  Perhaps split a bottle of Francis Ford Coppola wine and whined on each other’s shoulders or downfalls in life in general.  I’m sure it would have been a blast.  Call me next time okay.


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Dear Bacon – I’m not sure my son gets the full effect of my look here.  This is my what.do.you.mean.you.want.to.stay.out.all. night.long.partying.look.  Does it work for you?  Do I need to change something for more of an effect?  Any suggestions?  Signed Dad in Charge

Dear Dad in Charge – I think you have the look down pact.  Did you follow it with, “Not while you are living under my roof?” and “While you are living under my roof, you will obey my rules”?  That usually works when my dad uses them on us anipals here at the Hotel Thompson.  Maybe take away his allowance.  That *always* hurts this little oinker where it counts.  Good luck with your son my friend.  Just think of these as his teenage rocky years.


Remember my friends – Dear Bacon can’t happen without YOU.  Please continue to send me your letters and pictures to my email address.  🙂

 

 
7 Comments

Posted by on 07/14/2015 in Bacon, Dear Bacon

 

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Facebook Fun

 
10 Comments

Posted by on 05/17/2015 in Bacon

 

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Mom Made it to Wikipedia?!

What?  When did this happen?  Mommy made it to Wikipedia?  You’ve got to be kidding this little oinker.  No way!  My mom is a model living in Paris and is worth $32 million dollars?  Heck, she can afford to buy me a truck load of Gold Fish and Animal Crackers then!  And she is the most beautiful woman alive on this planet – get out of here! Of course, *I* always knew she was beautiful inside and out.  That’s my mommy world!  So proud of her.

Of course this is all a joke.  Well most of it.  Mommy is not a model by any means, unfortunately does not live in Paris and no where on this earth does she make $32 million… more like $32 dollars.  Snorts – but money is not everything – love is.  This making of Wikipedia is a feature on Facebook lately and mom took the challenge.  Okay, maybe she didn’t and I did for her but it was fun… right?  Snorts and rolls with laughter – you go mother of mine!

 
12 Comments

Posted by on 03/12/2015 in Bacon

 

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Kermit Gone Bad

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Dear Miss Piggy,

Kermit is bad for you.  Look at this drunken amphibian.  Getting drunk – taking selfies and posting them on Facebook.  All of this when he should be spending quality time with the Goddess that you are.

Any time you are ready for a better life and to be treated like you should – call me okay.

Your Loving Future Piggy Husband – Bacon20140716-192404-69844349.jpg

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30 Comments

Posted by on 02/21/2015 in Bacon

 

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Can YOU Relate?

Snorts!  I was on mom’s Facebook account this past week and found this from a poster on My Sweet Parade.  They had written this information and when I showed it to mom and dad, they just nodded their heads, laughed and then got that glazed look in their faces like they do sometimes.  Can you relate to this too?

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18 Comments

Posted by on 01/10/2015 in Bacon

 

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Dear Bacon

I’m BBAACCKK!  After a wonderful month off from my regular routine, I am back with my normal postings.  Hope you enjoyed my 31 Days of Spook my friends – now back to some wonderful Dear Bacon issues with anipals that need help –


20140719-223146-81106311.jpgDear Bacon –  I have a slight problem here.  I’m always being watched.  Always.  It’s like I get no peace or alone time.  What can I do?  He’s watching me now, isn’t he?  Signed Helpless

Dear Helpless –  WOW!  He is watching you right this instance.  What is he writing a book – are you chapter 3?  The dude needs to leave you alone.  You need to fix this now.  Perhaps the next time he is in the other room, maybe you need to shut the door.  Or persuade him into a closet.  You know, something along those lines.  Sshheessh – a purr thing has to have their alone time.  Good luck my friend.


 

20140719-223146-81106909.jpgDear Bacon –  With the cold weather coming, I have to use anything to keep my head warm.  They say if the head is warm, your entire body is warm.  I think this is doing the trick.  I found it in the miniature human’s room.  What do you think?  Signed Cat Heater

Dear Cat Heater – My friend.  I think you might want to rethink that head warmer.  Tell me it’s new and not slightly used too okay.  You see, that is not a head warmer.  That is one of the miniature humans butt warmers.  I’ve seen them.  What happens in them is not pretty.  Not pretty at all.  Although it does have a certain appeal as apparel, I’m afraid the other purr things in the hood might just laugh you out of the neighborhood and not let you play in their kitty games.  I’m just sayin’.

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Dear Bacon – Life is not fair.  Halloween only comes but once a year and I am so very glad.  Can you believe that my humans dressed me up like a poop factory for the big day?  I’m so humiliated.  Why couldn’t they dress up the small human that cries all of the time like this?  Why me?  I mean my poop is no more than the humans.  Really.  Please help me.  Signed Poop Factory

Dear Poop Factory – I have to admit my friend that the costume is very original.  I saw a lot of costumes on the big night but I think yours might be the icing on the cake.  I say wear it with pride.  I know it’s humiliating.  But I assure you that Christmas is just around the corner.  You know what needs to be done to the Christmas tree.  You know just as a token of your appreciate for this outfit.  Snorts.


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Dear Bacon – Where there’s a bag, you know a cat is there to play.  My buddy snapped this picture of me while I was playing pop goes the kitty in the bag.  Talk about perfect timing huh?  I think my abs look better than your pot belly.  What do you think?  Signed Abercrombie Cat

Dear Abercrombie Cat – OMP (Oh my pig).  That is hilarious.  This picture is so priceless that I’m going to let the shot of my physique just go right on by.  I say bravo to you and your brother for the perfect picture taking.  I think this needs to go viral, perhaps be in a Cats of 2015 calendar or a Christmas card.  Maybe even sneak on your parents Facebook account and post this picture.  Great job my friends.  Now, I’m off to look for me an equally charming shopping bag.  I wonder if they have one with James Bond somewhere here in the Hotel Thompson.

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20140719-223146-81106515.jpgDear Bacon – For some reason, I think there is an impersonator here in the room with me.  I woke up from one of my many naps this morning, waddled into the living room and found HIM.  HIM is not talking, not purring and not moving.  I think he’s trying to wait for me to turn my back.  I just know he is.  What do you think?  Signed Chucky

Dear Chucky – Oh my!  I think you need to be careful there little guy.  It looks like HIM is preparing to pounce on you.  That could be really dangerous.  I can only imagine what kind of damage he could do to you.  Shivers.  Thank goodness HIM is not here.  Be careful.  Maybe never turn your back to him.  That’s it.  Be vigilant!


Thanks my friends for your letters and pictures for my Dear Bacon issues.  I can’t do this without you.  Please remember to send me your letters/pictures to my email.  ❤ you!

 
32 Comments

Posted by on 11/04/2014 in Dear Bacon

 

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Mom and Dad’s New Game – Answers

Hey my friends – today I’m giving you the answers from mom and dad’s new game that I posted about yesterday.  Remember, I showed you a picture to guess but did not give you any clues like how many letters or words the answer was.  My deviled Ham side came out to play – snorts. The answer are posted below – how many did you get right?  Remember these are the game answers and the game’s way of thinking.  Should be interesting.

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EXAMPLE 

You have to put on your thinking cap and really look at the pictures.  By looking at this picture to the left, you see a man, a boat and a tiger.  The conclusion:  Life of Pi

Does that blow your mind?  Now figure out these –

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By looking at the nail and the manicure, you are suppose to get beauty.  The lady has a crown so she is a Queen.

The answer – beauty queen.

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                   Picture 2 –

This one took mom and dad a bit to figure out.  The number 10 means perfect in this illustration.  The umbrella with the rain means storm.

The answer – Perfect Storm

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Picture 3 –

A house – that’s kind of obvious however the tree throws you a bit.  The illustration of a woman in a wedding dress means wife.

The answer – housewife

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 Picture 4 –

Candy is obvious as well as apple.

The answer – Candy Apple

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This one is one of the more simple ones.  There’s a piggy – yay me – snorts.  Then there’s a bag of money.

The answer – Piggy Bank

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Picture 6 –

This is one that really blew mom and dad’s mind.  It’s deep.  You have to really look at the pictures.  A snowflake, the sun, the leaves – and then you shake your head in confusion huh?

The answer – Four Seasons

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 Picture 7

Another one that requires a little thinking.  There’s a cat, a dog and a horse with a world looking image. What could it be.  Oh – now it’s obvious –

The answer – Animal Planet

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I leave you with another one that your probable got right.  A snake and a set of eyes.

The answer – Snake Eyes

 

 

 

 

 

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18 Comments

Posted by on 08/28/2014 in Bacon

 

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Mom and Dad’s New Game

Those parents of mine.  Can you say crazy?  Can you say they act like teenagers or small children?  Rolls piggy eyes.  I guess that’s what really keeps them young at heart huh?  Mom found this new game for her iPhone.  It’s an ap called Guess the Emoji.  For those that are on mom’s Facebook page, I’m sure you are familiar with it.  Why do you ask?  Because when you get stuck on the game, you can ask your friends on Facebook for help.  And trust me, mom has done that – snorts.

The premise of the game – they show you pictures and you have to figure out what it means.  If you are right, you go to the next picture.  If not, you are ‘stuck’ until you figure it out.  It’s an awesome game.  What’s funny about it are the conversations between mom and dad.  See with dad’s limited vision, mom has to explain the pictures to him.  Which in itself is almost comical.  But on the other hoof, daddy is really good with the game.  Also with the game, they do show you how many words the answer is and how many letters.  They even give you the available letters at the bottom of the page.

For your entertainment, I thought I would share some of the pictures for you to guess.  And no, I’m not showing you how many letters or words the answer is… that’s my little piggy twist – evil huh?  Snorts.  I will post the answers tomorrow.  The first one is to show you an example.  Good luck my friends!

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EXAMPLE 

You have to put on your thinking cap and really look at the pictures.  By looking at this picture to the left, you see a man, a boat and a tiger.  The conclusion:  Life of Pi

Does that blow your mind?  Now figure out these –

.

 Picture 1 –                                                                               Picture 2 –

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Picture 3 –                                                                         Picture 4 –

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Picture 5 –                                                                       Picture 6 –

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Picture 7 –                                                                         Picture 8 –

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26 Comments

Posted by on 08/27/2014 in Bacon, Uncategorized

 

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