Hello sweet friends – we finally made it to Friday. Thank goodness for that! I just had to share my picture from this week with you. This is me laying with mom cuddling me. See Mr. Elephant? That’s my new toy that mom bought for me. He’s just my size. He still squeaks and I keep dragging him around the house by his nose. It’s perfect. Can you see my eyes in this picture? Barks with puppy laughter. That’s what I keep telling mom too. I need a haircut. I think I need a spa day for sure.
Dear Bacon,
Little dude, you are a hoot. I read your blog all of the time. I mean, up here in the cold – what else is there to do? All of my buddies come over at least once a week so we can read your page together. You are so funny little man. You should go on the road. What do you think? We’ll buy tickets! Signed Sealed and Funny
Dear Signed Sealed and Funny,
Thanks my friend. I appreciate those kind words. Everyone here at the Hotel Thompson has a tendency not to take life too serious – just go with it and have some fun. It makes life so much more interesting! I’ll let you know about any future road dates. 🙂
Dear Bacon,
You really should overcome your anti-nature fears. It’s great out outside! Look at this great picture that my older brother took of me on the beach. You gotta come here and put your hooves in the sand. Once you do, you’ll never go back! I’ll save a beach chair for you – come on down! Signed Chillin Tiny
Dear Chillin Tiny,
I will keep that in mind my friend. You do look so very comfortable and that picture really pulls at some heart strings. I’ve seen pictures from mom of the beach as well. They make me almost want to rethink my anti-nature policies. I am working on it. When I make that leap of faith, I’ll be sure to let you know. Don’t be surprised if you get a call from me somewhere in the near future my friend! Thanks for the invite.
Dear Bacon,
Oh little man – purr – come on down to the desert and play with me. I’m just like one of your purr things there at the Hotel Thompson. I can help you get over your outdoor phobias. Trust me, I can. Growl – Signed Playful
Dear Playful,
For some reason, I just don’t get the same love and desire of you wanting to help me like my friend Chillin Tiny. As you said, you are like the purr things here. With that in mind, I’m thinking your parting words of ‘trust me’ would be like something Hemi would say here before he swats me on my piggy fanny. But, I appreciate the invite. I think I’ll stay in the south and continue to be a member of the Hotel Thompson. Take care of yourself my friend. Be sure to use sunscreen.
Dear Bacon,
I bet you had to look twice at this picture, didn’t you or did you? This thing called Photoshop is amazing. I could even Photoshop you in my pouch. Wouldn’t that be fun? I could take you everywhere! Signed Hop n’ Fun
Dear Hop n’ Fun,
PLOL (Pig Laughing Out Loud). That does look like so much fun! Perhaps I do need to come see you in real life so we can have so much fun down under!
Dear Bacon,
Since all of the Harry Potter movies are done and over with, I have a lot of time on my wings these days. Most days now, you can find me skateboarding along the boardwalk. Watch out Tony Hawk – I’m coming for you with some of my tricks. Signed Hedwig
Dear Hedwig,
I was just wondering what you were up to these days. I just watched a couple of the Harry Potter movies last weekend. You’re looking good. They must be right about the camera adding 10 pounds plus because you look a lot smaller in this picture! Be safe my friend.
Dear Bacon, See there’s this place called the GYM that humans and animals work out at all of the time. You should find it. You’re starting to look a little porky – bark – ha. Signed Stud Muffin
Dear Mutt Stud, You want to go there huh? This exquisite body is 45 pounds of lean shapely pig. I’m called a pot bellied pig for a reason. It takes a lot of work to maintain this exquisite physique. You should only inspire to have this high performance body one day my friend. That is all.
Dear Bacon, 
I do not know why you insist on calling those bubbly things in water a spa adventure. They are not and I will not abide. You and the humans can not make me.
I will not partake in that watery death sentence. Signed Cornered
Dear Cornered, WOW – I commend you on the nose in the corner situation. Is it really all that bad? I would think that you for one would love to play with the bubbles.
I know the purr things here do when mom is in bubble land. Did you even stick a paw in the suds?
Dear Bacon, I’ve heard in your Netflix que you have a lot of ghost and life after death shows. HA – I think I’m right up your alley little man. Any time you want to take the challenge, you just let me know. I think I can accommodate you. Signed Precious
Dear Precious, Who you been talking to about my private Netflix account? I’m good. Really I am. I do find it intriguing but not so much to take a challenge physically to find out. I thank you very much though for the offer. It was awfully nice of you and I appreciate the thoughts. You just take it easy and try not hurt yourself okay. Thanks anyhow!
Dear Bacon, 
Sing with me little oinker –
You put your right foot in,
You put your right foot out,
You put your right foot in
And you shake it all about.
You do the Hokey Pokey
And you turn yourself around,
That’s what it’s all about.
Signed Dancing and Singing Elephant
Dear DAS Elephant, I absolutely loved it and needed that snort. Thanks so much my friend. Keep up the fabulous work!
❤ Remember friends, Dear Bacon can’t happen without YOU. Please continue to email me your pictures and letters. ❤
Happy Tuesday my friends. Sometimes we just need a little something extra to make us laugh, to put an extra step in our giddy up, you know just something to amuse us to make us chuckle. I have looked far and wide and found something that is guaranteed to make you smile.
I looked all over the internet in search for the one thing that you would look at and just burst out in automatic laughter. I think I found it. I showed it to dad – he almost fell off the couch. That was a good sign on the amusement scale. I showed it to mom. She was putting on make up and let’s just say the eye liner didn’t all go on her eyes because she was laughing so hard. I showed it to the purr things. Even *they* laughed hysterically!
So my friends, here is the test. Here is my pal that can be rented out at parties. He is guaranteed to make you laugh. Please get out your singles and have them ready for the entertainment. May I present to you – Stripper Tiny!
Did you know that when baby elephants have a ‘fit’ and don’t get their way, they throw themselves into mud like this little guy and have a ‘temper tantrum’? Did you know that?
Well, mom called me her little baby elephant this past weekend. I didn’t get my way so I threw myself on a pillow on the floor with my butt in the air like that. It didn’t work. Mom just told me to let her know when I was finished. My mom – she’s a tough one like that.
What was the temper tantrum about? Well I might have grabbed my big box of Gold Fish and taken off with it down the hall to my room. I know – I shouldn’t have. But mom confiscated and said no more Gold Fish for the day. What? NNNOOO!! I need my Gold Fish. Help my friends.
Dear Bacon – My mom holds my trunk every time we go out on walks. It’s so embarrassing. I like to think that I’m a big elephant now. I don’t need to hold hands. Does your mom make you do these things too? Signed Mommy’s Boy
Dear Mommy’s Boy – I hate to tell you this my friend but we will always be mommy’s baby regardless if we are two or a hundred and two. That’s the way it is. I wouldn’t worry what anyone else thinks of your situation. One day when your mom is gone, you will wish for these days again. So I tell you, enjoy your mom holding your trunk. Love every minute of it and hey why don’t you hold her trunk for a change. You can tell your friends that’s the case. You are protecting your mother and helping to guide her.
Dear Bacon – This means war. All day every day. You do know what I’m talking about, right? I refuse to become a chicken nugget. I’m a rebel with a cause. I’m the extreme free range chicken. Unite with me and stand with the cause. Signed Rebel with a Cause
Dear Rebel with a Cause – I’m so with you. I would stand beside you for your cause. I would even add my cause. I refuse to be a pork meal in any shape or form from bacon to pork chops and anything in between. If we don’t stand up for our rights,ele who will? I say we have a meet up at Old McDonald’s Farm on Highway 42 at midnight to talk about our stand. I’ll start making posters and hanging them in all of the fast food restaurant bathrooms ASAP.
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Dear Bacon – There we were at the local bar mingling when we ordered a drink called the Blue Calypso. Were we surprised when it came to the table. Oh my hamsters – it had a garnish that was alive and swimming. We didn’t know whether to drink it, play with it or tip it. What say you? Signed The Twins – Adam and Bubba
Dear Adam and Bubba – Now *that* is a surprise my friends. I’m with you. What to do? Well, you can’t drink/eat the tyke now. You’ve been introduced and are on friendly terms now. And on the other hoof, if you leave him, someone else will take care of your problem in a bad way. I say, ask him to come home with you to keep him safe. Wouldn’t that be fun to have an extra room-mate? He does look kind of cool and just think of how much trouble ya’ll can get into. I bet he would even be great at charades.
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Dear Bacon – There is always that one person in the hood that is your arch enemy. So yes I have eaten little more lately than usual. It’s summer. It’s hot. There’s nothing else to do but eat. Maybe perhaps I shouldn’t have eaten that last dog biscuit. I went outside to take care of some business and while coming back in I got stuck in a compromising position. I swear someone shrunk my doggy door. And then there is that one friend-enemy that snuck up behind me and drew a happy face on my butt. Really? Don’t push me and help guy out, embarrass him instead. What an idiot. When I get out of this position, he is so going to pay. What do you think? Signed Two Faced
Dear Two Faced – Give me a second to gain my composure. I’m not laughing at you. I’m laughing with you at the situation. It could very well be this little porker stuck in the doggy door. While your friend-enemy was drawing on your butt perhaps you should have told him to kiss while he was back there. At least he wasn’t talking behind your back – snorts. And don’t worry, I’m sure you will get even. You know what they say about karma – it goes around Don’t forget that okay.
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Dear Bacon – Julia Child – nope. Emeril – nope. Bobby Flay – nope. I’m the original Chef Wolf Dog Gang. Since graduating from the CICC (Culinary Institution of Canine Cooking), I can’t stay out of the kitchen. Not only can I bring home the bacon (sorry pal) but I can cook it up in the pan. Friends in the hood come from all over to taste some of my creations. You can often find me shopping in gardens around the house and coming up with such masterpieces as Hot Dog Casserole, Mutt Balls with Brown Rice, Doggy Lasagna and Chicken Backlash. They are all must haves and I hope to market them soon. When I get my cooking channel up, I would love for you to be my first guest. Signed Chef Wolf Dog Gang
Dear Chef Wolf Dog Gang – That is totally awesome that you picked up a hobby that is also a career. You know what they say about if you enjoy and love your job, you will never work a day in your life. Keep up the great work and hey can you send me some Mutt Balls with Brown Rice? That sounds fantastic! Oh and I would love to be your first guest as long as well you know… I’m a guest and not the guest of the meal if you know what I mean – snorts.
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Dear Bacon – All I can say is meow! What we do for our humans to see the smiles on their faces. Sometimes a line needs to be drawn. Me wearing a sock is where that line comes into play. At least they could have washed the sock first. Eeow Meow. Help. Signed Helpless
Dear Helpless – Let’s look at this in a different way my friend. Looking at your arms, I don’t see a lot of hair. Perhaps – and this is stretching it a bit – but perhaps they were thinking of you and your needs. Perhaps they thought you were cold in this weather? Yeah, that’s it. They were trying to comfort you and keep your warm. Okay, they have a funny way of showing it by using a stinky sock but tell me this. Did it do the trick? Are you all snug as a bug and warm in that cocoon? And hey, you may look like that the little guy from Harry Potter but you do look kind of cute there. It’s in the eyes my friend.
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Dear Bacon – Can’t stop right now. I’m playing G-Force on the PlayStation. You know what G-Force is, right? It’s a game with guinea pigs that have awesome skills – just like me. Humans don’t understand the game because well they are not us and us have secrets to the world. You understand right Bacon? Signed G-Force in Action
Dear G Force in Action – I understand perfectly my little friend. We take all of gaming very serious. You should see me on Mario Brothers or Tetris. I can do wonders in high scores in these games. What the humans don’t know won’t hurt them. I gotta go now. I’m working on some signs for “BACON FOR PRESIDENT 2016”. What do you think? Can us anipals pull together and make this happen? I think we can. I *know* we can!
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Dear Bacon – I found this wonderful creation in the home the humans live in. It’s white and very soft. So soft that I think it needs to go in my pouch. Have you ever seen this puffy wonder? Signed Roo with No Clue
Dear Roo with No Clue – Oh my friend. That marshmallow white puff is something that the humans hold close to them in their scratch box room. It’s like sacred to them for something – I’m not sure what though. If you are going to take it, take it fast before they catch you. Awesome find!
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Dear Bacon – There I was walking in the jungle, minding my own business and I got a little thirsty. When what did I see? I saw this home that some crazy human built in the trees. I was like WOW that’s fascinating. So I walked over to it and looked over the edge. BINGO! Winner winner this elephant is a winner. I found a watering hole just for me! I don’t think they would mind. Have you ever seen anything like this? Signed Bingo
Dear Bingo – Awesome find my friend. I’ve seen this guy on television make these homes in the tree. I would love to have one. I’ve been trying to talk my dad into it but somehow he doesn’t think it’s a great idea. I can’t imagine why it wouldn’t be. Have fun my friend. Say hey to the humans for me. .
REMEMBER FRIENDS – Dear Bacon can’t happen without *you*. Please keep sending your pictures and letters to me via email 🙂
Dear Bacon,
They always say that grass is always greener on the other side. Well, I stuck my head through the fence to look at the other side. And you know what? It doesn’t look greener. Can you hear what I’m saying pig? It does *not* look greener. Signed Mythbuster Goat
Dear Mythbuster Goat,
Thank you for letting me know that. I’ve always wondered about the grass being greener on the other side. I just never knew what the other side was. Now I do. You’ve helped *me* out so very much.
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Dear Bacon,
What? I’m only helping my brother out in getting all of the crumbs on the bottom of the bowl. Really? Cause you know all of the good stuff is on the bottom of the bowl. Honestly. Signed Chef Paw
Dear Chef Paw,
I will take your word for that. Take it from an expert who is used to getting all of his crumbs, it’s much easier just to flip the bowl over. That way, you can get some of the crumbs as well. Just a tip my friend….and thank goodness your brother wasn’t drinking water.
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Dear Bacon,
I was having a dream that I was fixing to eat the biggest hot dog in the entire world. It look so delicious. I could almost taste it. Then I woke up cause I bit my paw. What a let down. Do you ever dream of eating food? Signed Dog Dreams
Dear Dog Dreams,
Snorticles. Do I ever have those dreams – snorts. That’s like asking me if I’m hungry. Of course I have those dreams. I can’t say though that I’ve ever tried to eat a paw or hoove. My legs are too short to reach my mouth – thank goodness!That must have been a mighty good dream my friend.
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Dear Bacon,
Where are the clothes pins when you need them? Sometimes I just need a few to pin back the wrinkles on my head. That way, maybe my tongue wouldn’t fall out of my mouth when I’m sleeping. You think? Signed Rip Van Pup
Dear Rip Van Pup,
I feel you my friend. I totally feel you. Sometimes when I sleep, everything wonders into their own zipcode. My mom feels the same way. All it means though is you are totally relaxed and comfortable in your environment. That’s a good thing.
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Dear Bacon,
Bottoms up! I saw the pictures you had of Bashful at Tybee Island last October. They really intrigued me. I thought I would stick my head in the ocean to see if I could find Sponge Bob and Patrick. I didn’t see them but got a lot of water in my trunk. And by the way, does this ocean make my butt look big? Signed Scubaphant
Dear Subaphant,
I’m so sorry little guy. Bashful saw Spongebob at Tybee last year because they were doing a movie on the island. I think afterwards he went back home to Hawaii. But I say, keep looking cause you never know where he might wash up on shore. As far as your butt, it looks just fine. I only wish mine was that cute!
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Friends – don’t forget to send your questions and pictures to me at Baconthompson@gmail.com
Piglove 