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Door Watch 2016 – Sherlock Bones

That freaking no good for nothing messed up evil elf is an … is an… is an.. how do I say it..  okay I gotta say it – a$$hole.  No really he is.  There is no way to sugar coat it.

I’m on Door Watch 2016 last night.  Everyone else is in bed.  I’m determined to bring some kind of cheeriness to the Hotel Thompson this year – free of that misfit Evil Elf on the Shelf that lives here called Don Juan.  He is just totally messed up.  I think he fell on his pointed head too many times at the North Pole.

So there I was in the front room on patrol.  I hear some movement from the Elf Door.  I go closer to give it a good sniff.  The odor is there – you know the peppermint, pine and eggnog smell.  I know he’s in there.  If I move just the right way, I can see a light inside of the hole.  So I wiggled down, moving slightly to the left – to the right – up a bit.  That’s when I saw it.  That little evil elf knew I was there.  How do I know?  I took the picture below to show you.   Now you believe me?  A$$hole.

 
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Posted by on 11/21/2016 in 25 Days of Christmas, Bacon

 

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Door Watch 2016 – Sherlock Bones

Sherlock Bones here checking in on Door Watch 2016.  Watching that door is wiping me out.  I’m not sleeping.  I barely move except for the basics – you know a dog has to do what a dog has to do outside.  Other than that and eating, I’m watching and listening at that pesky door in the hallway.  I know that freak is behind the door listening to me too.  I can smell him.  The other day I said he smelled like peppermint and pine.  Evil squirrel said it best too – he has a faint smell of alcohol.  Don’t shake your head no – listen to the reasoning.  He smells like spiked eggnog.  Really!  The smells coming out of that door are somewhat revolting yet mesmerizing in a way.  I think it might be his magic powers coming to light.  I really hope not.

I was so tired last night that Houdini and Bacon tagged team and they stood watch while I got a little shut eye.  The picture of me tells you everything.  This Door Watch 2016 is taking its toll.  I drifted off to sleep land, content, warm with a full belly.  I had some of the most pleasant dreams.  One of which involved the little seasonal outcast… I found a picture to explain.

I hope you are continuing your watch on your misbehaved elves.  Time is ticking and getting closer to their freedom.  We must stand united!

 

 
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Posted by on 11/18/2016 in 25 Days of Christmas, Bacon

 

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