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Lasso of Truth

Bacon’s mom here. Don Juan is now considered a bratty elf beyond any kind of help.  So he sends my picture to Santa that’s great.  But did he have to send my picture via Playboy magazine?  You can’t lie Don Juan.  The proof was in yesterday’s posting that Bacon did.  We won’t even discuss how much Bacon charged on daddy’s credit card to get back all of those magazines.  Shakes my head.

And now you have way overstepped your boundaries here at the Hotel Thompson.

Messing with the kids is one thing.  Messing with the husband is another thing.  But messing with my collectible Barbie dolls – shaking head.  That’s where I have to draw the line.

When I took a nap yesterday – cause Lord knows we can’t sleep at night with that freak running around rapid – I dreamed of my favorite Super Hero – Wonder Woman and what she would do with that freakzoid with her lasso of truth – giggles.  We should only know how he felt about being tied up by my number one hero – HA!

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Posted by on December 12, 2017 in 25 Days of Christmas, Bacon

 

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Don Juan Has Done It Now!

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How in the world am I going to explain this picture to mommy?  It looks like that little psycho elf has been into mom’s pictures and sent them to a certain magazine which has made its way to the big man and his elves.

Shakes piggy head.  This can’t be good.  Look at their faces?!  Oh dear piggy heavens.  How am I ever going to tell mommy what Don Juan has done this time?!  What will daddy think?

You gotta help me friends.  How do I break it gently to my mom that her private pictures may not be so private anymore and that she might be on Santa’s naughty list… but he might like it?  Snorts.

Don Juan is in deep doo-doo here at the Hotel Thompson. Shakes piggy head and walks away with daddy’s credit card.  I gotta buy all of these off the market so she doesn’t see the cover.

 
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Posted by on December 11, 2017 in 25 Days of Christmas, Bacon

 

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Paw Time with Houdini

Sometimes I have to admit that dad knows how to pick a shirt out for me.  Barks with puppy laughter.  On this shirt, I can say that we are two of a kind in agreement of our priorities from shopping. A pup can *never* have too many clothes.  Dad got this one for me to add to my wardrobe.  I needed something because tomorrow I’m finally going to my pet spa.  And trust me, this pooch needs a spa day.  I’ve spent the past couple of months pushing it.  Mom/dad went off to Australia and then when they got back mom had surgery.  I couldn’t leave mom during that time.  I had to be here in case she needed me.  You know, a dog’s work is never done.  So last night, I text my groomer Kim and told her I was a hot mess and needed the works – bubble bath, massage, cut and some me time.  I can’t wait to see her tomorrow.  I wonder if she does hot stone treatments?  Anyway, hopefully tomorrow night I will feel so much better.  Hope ya’ll have a great weekend as well.  Now I leave you with dad.  Of course my apologies up front.  He’s getting ready for the fat man coming at the end of the month.

 
 

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Travels in the South

Sometimes you want food that just screams comfort to you.  My mom’s comfort food when she is feeling really bad – are you ready for this – is a Happy Meal from McDonald’s.  Can you believe that?  She has been recuperating from her surgery, some days are good and some days are testing her ability not to scream.  Well one of her friends brought her a hamburger Happy Meal ordered with extra happy for her one day.  Wasn’t that awesome?  I’m not sure if it was the Happy Meal or the extra happy that made mom’s day but it did.

Mom had to take this picture of everything.  That is a hamburger, two bags of cut up apples (I guess that was the extra happy, you think?) a small fries, a drink and of course a girl toy.  And yes, please check out the size of that fries in relationship to the hamburger.  Do you think they could be any smaller?  Snorts and rolls with piggy laughter.

 
 

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Okay – Now the Freak is Pushing It

  I am not amused – meows.  There I was minding my own business and that pesky little elf freak jumped on my back.  It wasn’t bad enough that mom dressed me up.  She must think I’m Houdini with these clothes – and trust me friends – she would be so very wrong.

I’m a man cat… a Hemingway if you will.  We don’t do clothes or pesky elves.  Don Juan does realize that my claws are out. now.

I’m putting you on notice freak adventure.  It will be pay back time soon.  This may be the year you go down.

Signed Hemi

 
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Posted by on December 5, 2017 in 25 Days of Christmas, Bacon

 

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Christmas Decorations – tsk tsk Daddy Oh

 20131209-014402.jpg Oh boy.  That human daddy of mine just digs himself deeper and deeper this time of year.  Mommy asked him to take out some decorations for Christmas.  Maybe it’s just me but I don’t think the leg lamp is exactly what mommy had in mind.  He tried to fight for it saying that it was a classic and came from the movie, “A Christmas Story“.  He continued by saying that if it was good enough for Ralphie’s dad then it should be good enough for him.  Way to go daddy.  You need a shovel to dig yourself deeper into the hole?

I just bet you that all mom heard was blah, blah, blah and blah. She was patient and she was kind.  She let him make arguments over the said leg lamp.

I don’t know about you but that’s the way moms seem to be.  They get quiet and listen while you dig the hole bigger and bigger.  Just, you know, letting you stumble over yourself.  I watched and tried not to snort because I knew it was coming.  She said, “Listen Ralphie, if I dared you to stick your tongue to the frozen pole, would you do that too because everyone else was doing it?”  She’s good.  The leg lamp was put back in the attic.

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But you see, daddy doesn’t learn that easily.  Mom told him to put up the tree while she went out shopping.  For some reason, I just don’t think that this is what mommy was talking about.

Needless to say, mom was out for about an hour.  I know she thought she was going to come home to a tree… just a tad bit bigger than this I’m guessing.

Let’s just say that daddy was batting two for two this weekend.  So, our tree and decorations really didn’t get worked on like I thought they were going to.  And the discussion about actually putting up a tree took place.  Tree or no tree.  Because someone – looking innocently – knocked over the tree last year.  That keeps coming up for some reason.  I don’t get it.  The tree got tired and thirsty so it took a nap.  That’s it.  Really.

 

 
 

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Paw Time with Houdini

Barks friends!  See I can hold up both of my ears when I want to.  Barks with puppy laughter.  But why?  I live to be different.  It makes you wonder what I’m thinking.  Am I right?  On this date, I was wearing my “I’m crabby” t-shirt.  I don’t know why mom thought it was appropriate but she did.  I don’t think it’s crabby wanting to be under her feet 24X7 during her healing process.  Do you?  I mean, mom *needs* me all the time but especially now.  Why can’t I go to work with her?  Why can’t I escort her to the mailbox and back?  Who knows a frog might jump in her path.  A squirrel may chase her.  It could happen.  I could save her life by being there.  You tell her for me okay.  Thanks!

Now I leave you with Jokes with Daddy.  I’m already shaking my head at this one.  I’m so sorry in advance – barks!!

 
 

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