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Beware My Friends

Beware my friends.  We have been watching the ID (Investigative Discovery) channel all weekend.  I’ve picked up a few things from the shows.

1 – There is never a perfect murder.

2 – Never leave DNA, spit, hair follicles, blood or other known sources of bodily fluids at a crime scene.

3 – Never go back to the crime scene.

4 – Pick one story and stick to it.  The least you make up the more you will remember and not get tripped up when and if you get interviewed.

5 – Never fall for the bad cop good cop routine.

6 – Never fall for it when the cops say they have proof or someone saw you.  Tsk-Tsk Who says cops have to tell you the truth when you are being interviewed.

7 – Knowing all of this, don’t commit any murders or crimes.  I don’t know about you but this pot belly doesn’t look good behind bars dressed in orange sharing a space with Bubba – snorts!

8 – If all else fails, blame daddy – double evil snorts!

 

 
29 Comments

Posted by on 07/05/2015 in Bacon

 

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Lowers Piggy Head – I’m in Trouble my Friends

 This is me in time out.  Sighs.  Mom says I have to pay the time for the crime.  I don’t get it.  I was just helping her out.  You have to believe me on that.  AND if you take my side after I tell you the story, then please write me a note to get me out of piggy jail in the comments.  Will you do that my friends?

So this is what happened.  We were all in the living room watching the ID channel.  For those that don’t know what the ID channel is – ID stands for Investigative Discovery.  They have ALL kinds of forensic shows of real crimes that take place from all over the world and how forensics solved them.  On the show that we were watching, the victim was in a vegetative state and had a living will to be taken off of all life saving equipment if such a thing happened to her.

My mom was over on her chaise working on my laptop that was plugged into the wall. She had been pounding that keyboard for hours now.  She was also drinking a glass of wine and had sat the glass on the floor.  She told all of us – Mouse Girl, Hemi, Houdini and daddy, that if she was ever in a vegetative state, she didn’t want to be dependent on a machine or fluids from a bottle.  She told us that if that happened, to pull the plug.  She said that my friends.

 I was just doing what she asked.  I got up, unplugged her laptop and knocked over her glass of wine.  I don’t think she thought I was helping her from her current vegetative state.  Snorts.  What say you?

 

 

 
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Posted by on 05/15/2015 in Bacon, Hemi and Mouse Girl, Houdini

 

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