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Enough With the Spam!

Are you tired of getting all of this Spam lately?  I just can’t take it anymore.  Stomping piggy hooves!!  Enough already – Spam should be outlawed – snorts.

You thought I was talking about email and blog spam?  Silly humans.. of course not.

I’m talking Spam.  Do you know what this stuff is made out of?  Come closer and I’ll whisper it to you – sshh – pork products.  You do realize what that means, right?  The Spam site explains it this way:

Spam is made of two cuts of the same piggy – the shock of that!  It says that the cuts come from (A) the pork shoulder because of its juiciness, tenderness and flavor and (B) the pig’s rear which is surprise – thick and flavorful.  OMP (Oh my pig!)  It’s bad enough that daddy looks at me sometimes feeling my rump wondering how many biscuits I would make.  The nerve!

I have to stop this insanity.  Why does it have to be pig?  Why can’t it be cow?  Heck, why can’t it be tofu?  Yep, I think personally that’s the way to go – tofu.  🙂

Let’s start a campaign now and take a stand – NO SPAM.  But I do have to say thank you to the Spam peeps – I am jucy, tender and flavorful – sticks tongue out!  Happy Friday my friends!

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Take Note:  This was all in fun jest.  I’m not dishing the Spam makers or eaters.  I was having fun.

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24 Comments

Posted by on November 4, 2017 in Bacon

 

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Jokes from a Cow

Courtesy from Pinterest

 
11 Comments

Posted by on July 16, 2017 in Bacon

 

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Donkey Farms

 Picture taken from Pinterest – snorts!

 
4 Comments

Posted by on February 11, 2017 in Bacon

 

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Dear Bacon

Dear Bacon – I’m not sure about you but my accountant really bites.  He’s got a bad attitude and is always thinking numbers.  I don’t get it.  Why can’t accountants have pleasant personalities – maybe joke around a bit.  I think that would really show a better enthusiasm for their job.  I mean we are talking about my money, it may not be a lot but it is mine.  I thought I would show you a pic of my guy.  I have to admit though, he’s good.  He chomps down and sets to work on that keyboard.  He looks for everything he can find to deduct.  If you ever need a good accountant, let me know okay.  Signed Frogger

Dear Frogger – Well my, my, my.  Your ‘guy’ does look very – how can I say it – professional in what he does. I see what you mean by his serious look.  He does have a stern don’t mess with me kind of disposition.  Maybe the numbers bring it out in him?  Maybe bring him a gift next time – some swamp water or some Lubriderm lotion.  I’ve heard that lotion does wonders for tough skin.


Dear Bacon –  My favorite time of the day is in this picture.  It’s early morning and it’s breakfast time!  They say that breakfast is the most important meal of the day.  Trust me.  It is.  And you know what.  Milk does a body good.  My little legs will grow strong and my ‘moo’ will be coming out soon.  Cause you know what they say?  You got to moo-moo it.  HA!  I made a funny.  I told you breakfast is important – it starts my day like awesome.  Signed Tina

Dear Tina – Shaking my head.  You are right.  Breakfast is very important not to miss in starting your day.  That’s why every day, I start off with my piggy chow and Cheerios.  I gotta keep my figure in check and my cholesterol down.  This piggy has places to travel!

 

 


Dear Bacon  – Don’t you hate it when uninvited solicitors show up at your door?  Take for instance, I was settled down reading my magazines and newspaper.  You know the typical Sunday leisure day.  Then Bob showed up selling God only knows what.  I told him I wasn’t interested in and he kept on roaring.  How rude!  I finally just had to turn and walk away.  Maybe he got the hint then.  Geez, some anipals huh?  Signed Tigger

Dear Tigger – Please don’t send Bob my way.  It’s bad enough when solicitors come into our hood.  They don’t even come to our crib anymore.  Too many times they have showed up and after seeing moi answer the door, they got scared and turned away.  I don’t get it.  I was just in the doorway with daddy answering the door.  Who cares that he was wearing his Sponge Bob underwear.  Shakes head.


 

Dear Bacon – Be glad that you don’t have a desk job little piggy.  In this picture, it was a Friday at 4:45 pm – almost time for the weekend to start.  The head guy showed up in my doorway and wanted a report that was going to take at least an hour to finish and he needed it that night.  WTD?  Really?  You waited all day to tell me this at 4:45 pm?  Shakes dog head – some people have no tact.  Signed Bruiser

Dear Bruiser – OMP!  I so understand.  Mom has been done this way a time or two.  I’ll tell you what I tell her when she calls and tells us she is going to be late.  It sucks and it’s unfair!  I hope you got some overtime for staying over my friend.


Remember my friends.  Dear Bacon can’t happen without *you*.  Please continue to email me your letters and pictures ❤ 

 
20 Comments

Posted by on July 5, 2016 in Bacon, Dear Bacon

 

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Dear Bacon

   Dear Bacon – Now listen up little pig.  I read about your antics at different times there at the Hotel Thompson.  You need to nice to those purr things.  Listen to your nana now okay.  Signed Nana Purr Thing

Dear Nana Purr Thing – Ma’am I’m as nice to the purr things as they are to me.  Really – you don’t know how they act to me at times.  They can be devious beyond belief.  And hey thanks for the advice.  I do appreciate it.  And you might want to wash your face – there’s something on it.  Helpful piggy see 🙂


Dear Bacon – Help.  I know it’s my birthday but please explain why my humans just can’t give me a dog biscuit or a bond or something.  Why do they have to dress me up in this ridiculous hat ensemble?  Please explain that to me.  Please and help.  Signed Happy Birthday To Me

Dear Happy Birthday To Me – Trust me my friend.  It could always be worse.  Last year for Houdini’s first birthday he got the works.  Mom dressed him up with a similar hat, a t-shirt and even threw him a party with the neighborhood anipals.  Shaking my piggy head.  It was a rough day for him.  Just take it in and smile.  This day should pass.


  Dear Bacon – Look at me, I’m a cow.  MOO – MOO – MOO.  Do you think I will pass when I go and interview with the Chick-Fil-A cows this afternoon?  Signed Moo in Disguise

Dear Moo in Disguise – Pass what?  I think you are a lovely cow my friend.  Just be careful out in the fields okay.  I’ve heard that cow tipping is a sport these days and humans love to do it.


 Dear Bacon – Oh yes my faithful human.  I’m in a position that I can’t get out of but you go right ahead.  Take a picture, post it on Facebook and share it with your friends.  Make sure the picture shows me in my moment of disgust.  We wouldn’t want you to have a bad picture.  I’ll just sit here with this contraption on my head.  We all know it’s about you and your friends.  I’ll wait patiently sharpening my claws.  You just get back to me as soon as you can okay.  Signed Kitty Waiting for Payback

Dear Kitty Waiting for Payback – Amen my purr thing.  I feel your pain.  Well, not your pain all twisted up in that slinky contraption.  But the pain of the humans taking pictures first and not just any picture – the perfect picture to share on line with everyone.  I think those claws should be sharpened to their finest for a little display of your unhappiness.  Can I send you a file to help you out?  Just let me know okay.


REMEMBER my friends.  Dear Bacon can’t happen without YOU.  Please continue to send me your letters and pictures to my email.  ♥

 
23 Comments

Posted by on April 19, 2016 in Bacon, Dear Bacon

 

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Donkey Farms

 Picture taken from Pinterest – snorts!

 
8 Comments

Posted by on February 3, 2016 in Bacon

 

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Moo Turkey

 
5 Comments

Posted by on November 14, 2015 in Bacon

 

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