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Dear Bacon

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Dear Bacon,
I hate baths. My humans think I need one every once in a while. I don’t. I mean why? I’ll just get dirty again, right? What can I do to change their minds? Signed On The Edge

Dear On The Edge,
Have you really tried to enjoy one my friend? It looks like your humans went all out and even put bubbles in the water. It even looks like a great tub my friend. I bet the water was even nice and warm. I myself love me a nice long bath. Especially when mom puts treats in the water. Maybe your humans need to try that? Suggest it and see how you feel then.

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Dear Bacon,
All my life, I’ve been slow. Let me change that. I’ve been slower than slow… If that’s even a speed! People have been making jokes about me for years. But nowadays, watch out. I got some wheels and there I zoomed by. They catch me these days riding dirty. Have you ever thought about riding? Signed Slow and Steady

Dear Slow and Steady,
You look good. You really do. Just be safe. Me on a bike? Snort – you have to be kidding. Bikes don’t have doors. I’ve got to protect this work of art. The closest I get to a cycle is moms Smart car. Snort LOL. Ride on my friend.

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Dear Bacon,
I love leather. I love the feel of it against my fur. Can you be honest and tell me if this jacket gives me chicken legs? Signed Biker Chick

Dear Biker CHICK,
So your question is does your leather jacket make you “look” like you have chicken legs? Now that’s a good questions. No, not at all. Your jacket doesn’t give that appearance at all. I think that diamond necklace draws attention to that gorgeous face of yours. Walking off shaking head laughing.

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Dear Bacon,
Hee hee. You’re always talking about those purr things that you love with on your page. I thought I would share a picture of what I do to my purr things. Laughing. I hide around corners until they walk by me. I think my purr thing only has maybe two life’s left. Rolling around laughing. Signed Gotcha

Dear Gotcha,
I have to admit that this is a good one. I will be saving it for future reference… I mean future not to do. Yeah, that’s it. Thanks my friend.

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Dear Bacon,
Have you ever played patty cake? Me and my dears have a great time playing this during the day. It makes the day go by so much faster. We’re getting really good at it. I think that it should be made into an Olympic Game, don’t you? When one of us misses a move, another of our friends jump in to replace them. It’s a hoot! It makes our down season, I mean our life go by so quickly. Signed Reindeer Gamers

Dear Reindeer Gamers,
No. I can’t say that I’ve ever played patty cake. My hooves are kind of oddly shaped. And, I really don’t have that kind of balance with this pot belly if you know what I mean. It gets in the way when I try to ‘stand’. It looks kind of fun though. Perhaps you should video tape it and let it go viral on line at YouTube. Have fun my friends.

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Dear Bacon,
I know you can relate man. You talk about your snout. Heck, look at my snout per say. It’s a sharp situation. No touching noses with this thing my friend. Signed Horny

Dear Horny,
Ouch. You got me on that one. Be safe with that thing my friend.

 
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Posted by on 10/16/2012 in Uncategorized

 

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