National Junk Food Day

Journalist Rocky the Squirrel here – Keeping his paws on the nuts of the world –

 I think this is a day that we *all* have been looking forward to all year long – National Junk Food Day.  Today, July 21st, we can eat all of the junk we want – hopefully without calories!  Today being National Junk Food Day gives us a chance to eat anything and everything we can put our greedy little hands/paws/hooves on and not feel one bit of guilt.  Potato chips, dips, Cheetos, pretzels, ice cream, nuts, french fries, milkshakes, pizza – what’s your pleasure for today?

Personally, I think today is going to be a race here at the Hotel Thompson to see who can eat more junk food – Bacon or his daddy… oh and don’t think Bacon’s mom won’t participate.  She’s been doing that four lettered bad word – diet – I’m sure she will enjoy her own as well!

 

National Junk Food Day

 

Journalist Rocky the Squirrel here –

Keeping his paws on the nuts of the world –

I think this is a day that we *all* have been looking forward to all year long – National Junk Food Day.  Today, July 21st, we can eat all of the junk we want – hopefully without calories!  Today being National Junk Food Day gives us a chance to eat anything and everything we can put our greedy little hands/paws/hooves on and not feel one bit of guilt.  Potato chips, dips, Cheetos, pretzels, ice cream, nuts, french fries, milkshakes, pizza – what’s your pleasure for today?

Personally, I think today is going to be a race here at the Hotel Thompson to see who can eat more junk food – Bacon or his daddy… oh and don’t think Bacon’s mom won’t participate.  She’s been doing that four lettered bad word – DIEt – I’m sure she will enjoy her own as well!

 

Dear Bacon

 Dear Bacon – This is the pits.  No, I mean it really.  It’s not bad enough that my humans put these ridiculous pajamas on me.  Now I have to wear the cone of shame.  AND they sat me in a make shift bed which is really an old potty box with a blanket.  Really?  This is how they treat me.  Can you give me a word of encouragement my piggy friend?  Signed Cat in the Hat

Dear Cat in the Hat – You know my friend.  You are looking at this all wrong.  Look at it from the positive prospective.  They put pajamas on you – I’m guessing – so that you wouldn’t scratch whatever you had done surgically, right?  Then they put the pitiful projector on your head so you couldn’t lick or bite that particular surgical spot, right?  AND then they put you in a comfortable spot with a blankie so you would be comfy.  See, look at it from this perspective.  Do you know what all of that adds up to this little piggy?  To me, it says your humans care for you way more than you think and want you to be comfortable during this duration.  Instead of looking at it from your point of view, take it from my point of view.  And let me add, suck it up for all it’s worth – humans love that when they think they’ve done something to you 🙂

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 Dear Bacon –  Can you believe my humans have the audacity to blame ‘me’ – innocent cute little ‘me’ – as stealing one of their valuable orange crunchy things they snack on while watching television?  Me.  There is no way they can pin this crime on me.  There is no proof!  Signed Cheeto

Dear Cheeto – Do me a favor my friend.  Go to your nearest mirror and look at yourself.  Go ahead.  I’l wait.  Whistles while waiting and taps hooves.  Oh good you are back.  Did you see that incriminating evidence on your cute little face?  The orange stuff my friend.  That would be evidence of eating your humans prized Cheetos.  By your name, I’m thinking this is not your first run in with the law on being busted for this crime.  Might I make a suggestion for future escapades?  Once you have partaken of the evil Cheeto, go drink some water out of your bowl with delight.  I mean slush that water around on your cute little face to wash the orange stuff off.  No proof means it didn’t happen my friend.  Happy eating.

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Dear Bacon – I was cold.  It was freezing in this house.  My humans like to hang me as they so delightfully like to say.  Don’t worry about us little pooches.  I had to resort to the last step and wrap myself like a hot dog.  It does the trick especially with the sun coming in from the window.  Have you ever been this cold?  Signed Cold Dog

Dear Cold Dog – WOW.  I say if you’re cold, go for it my friend.  I’m one of the very few here with us anipals that love it cold.  I’m with my mom and like you said, we like to hang meet here at the Hotel Thompson.  The colder the better.  Heck, if we could skip over summer we would so do so.  Stay warm my friend!

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Dear Bacon – Here is my brother.  He is so weird.  I was looking down at the dog just minding my own business.  That’s when Patches (my bro) jumped up and pulled my head up.  What was so important that he wanted me to see you ask?  The humans were cooking breakfast.  Something smelled so delightful.  They call it bacon.  I’m just wondering.  Do you know what this glorious smell is?  Signed Matches

Dear Matches – I know exactly what that awful stuff called bacon is.  It’s horrible.  Such a bad thing to ever try.  Some humans get addicted to it.  See, that’s how bad it is for you cats.  Once hooked, they can’t go back.  And I for one can guarantee you that you don’t want to get hooked on that bad drug.  Yeah, it’s a bad drug.  Better steer far away from it my friends.  I wouldn’t want it to stunt your growth or anything.  Snorts!

 

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Dear Bacon – Don’t you jussst love my new ssssweater?  I got it for my birthdaysss.  I just love to sssslither around the house wearing itsss.  I think it makesss me ssslim and bringsss out the color of my eyessss.  What do you thinksss?  Signed Sexy and I Know It

Dear Sexy and I Know It – As long as YOU think you are sexy and you know it, does it really matter what anyone else thinks?  You rock that sweater around your house all you want.  Perhaps maybe next time your humans can get you a longer one?  Keep slithering there where you are my friend.

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.

.

 

 

National Junk Food Day

 

Journalist Rocky the Squirrel here –

Keeping his paws on the nuts of the world –

.

I think this is a day that we *all* have been looking forward to all year long – National Junk Food Day.  Today, July 21st, we can eat all of the junk we want – hopefully without calories!  Today being National Junk Food Day gives us a chance to eat anything and everything we can put our greedy little hands/paws/hooves on and not feel one bit of guilt.  Potato chips, dips, Cheetos, pretzels, ice cream, nuts, french fries, milkshakes, pizza – what’s your pleasure for today?

Personally, I think today is going to be a race here at the Hotel Thompson to see who can eat more junk food – Bacon or his daddy… oh and don’t think Bacon’s mom won’t participate.  She’s been doing that four lettered bad word – DIEt – I’m sure she will enjoy her own as well!

 

National Junk Food Day

 

Journalist Rocky the Squirrel here –

Keeping his paws on the nuts of the world –

.

Oh chitter-chatter.  I think this is a day that we *all* have been looking forward to all year long – National Junk Food Day.  Today, July 21st, we can eat all of the junk we want – hopefully without calories!  Today being National Junk Food Day gives us a chance to eat anything and everything we can put our greedy little hands/paws/hooves on and not feel one bit of guilt.  Potato chips, dips, Cheetos, pretzels, ice cream, nuts, french fries, milkshakes, pizza – what’s your pleasure for today?

Personally, I think today is going to be a race here at the Hotel Thompson to see who can eat more junk food – Bacon or his daddy… oh and don’t think Bacon’s mom won’t participate.  She’s been doing that four lettered bad word – diet – I’m sure she will enjoy her own as well!

 

Dear Bacon

 Dear Bacon – This is the pits.  No I mean it really.  It’s not bad enough that my humans put these ridiculous pajamas on me.  Now I have to wear the cone of shame.  AND they sat me in a make shift bed which is really an old potty box with a blanket.  Really?  This is how they treat me.  Can you give me a word of encouragement my piggy friend?  Signed Cat in the Hat

Dear Cat in the Hat – You know my friend.  You are looking at this all wrong.  Look at it from the positive prospective.  They put pajamas on you – I’m guessing – so that you wouldn’t scratch whatever you had done surgically, right?  Then they put the pitiful projector on your head so you couldn’t lick or bite that particular surgical spot, right?  AND then they put you in a comfortable spot with a blankie so you would be comfy.  See, look at it from this prospective.  Do you know what all of that adds up to this little piggy?  To me it says your humans care for you way more than you think and want you to be comfortable during this duration.  Instead of looking at it from your point of view, take it from my point of view.  And let me add, suck it up for all it’s worth – humans love that when they think they’ve done something to you 🙂

---

 Dear Bacon –  Can you believe my humans have the audacity to blame ‘me’ – innocent cute little ‘me’ – as stealing one of their valuable orange crunchy things they snack on while watching television?  Me.  There is no way they can pin this crime on me.  There is no proof!  Signed Cheeto

Dear Cheeto – Do me a favor my friend.  Go to your nearest mirror and look at yourself.  Go ahead.  I’l wait.  Whistles while waiting and taps hooves.  Oh good you are back.  Did you see that incriminating evidence on your cute little face?  The orange stuff my friend.  That would be evidence of eating your humans prized Cheetos.  By your name, I’m thinking this is not your first run in with the law on being busted for this crime.  Might I make a suggestion for future escapades?  Once you have partaken of the evil Cheeto, go drink some water out of your bowl with delight.  I mean slush that water around on your cute little face to wash the orange stuff off.  No proof means it didn’t happen my friend.  Happy eating.

---

Dear Bacon – I was cold.  It was freezing in this house.  My humans like to hang me as they so delightfully like to say.  Don’t worry about us little pooches.  I had to resort to the last step and wrap myself like a hot dog.  It does the trick especially with the sun coming in from the window.  Have you ever been this cold?  Signed Cold Dog

Dear Cold Dog – WOW.  I say if you’re cold, go for it my friend.  I’m one of the very few here with us anipals that love it cold.  I’m with my mom and like you said, we like to hang meet here at the Hotel Thompson.  The colder the better.  Heck, if we could skip over summer we would so do so.  Stay warm my friend!

---

Dear Bacon – Here is my brother.  He is so weird.  I was looking down at the dog just minding my own business.  That’s when Patches (my bro) jumped up and pulled my head up.  What was so important that he wanted me to see you ask?  The humans were cooking breakfast.  Something smelled so delightful.  They call it bacon.  I’m just wondering.  Do you know what this glorious smell is?  Signed Matches

Dear Matches – I know exactly what that awful stuff called bacon is.  It’s horrible.  Such a bad thing to ever try.  Some humans get addicted to it.  See, that’s how bad it is for you cats.  Once hooked, they can’t go back.  And I for one can guarantee you that you don’t want to get hooked on that bad drug.  Yeah, it’s a bad drug.  Better steer far away from it my friends.  I wouldn’t want it to stunt your growth or anything.  Snorts!

 

---

Dear Bacon – Don’t you jussst love my new ssssweater?  I got it for my birthdaysss.  I just love to sssslither around the house wearing itsss.  I think it makesss me ssslim and bringsss out the color of my eyessss.  What do you thinksss?  Signed Sexy and I Know It

Dear Sexy and I Know It – As long as YOU think you are sexy and you know it, does it really matter what anyone else thinks?  You rock that sweater around your house all you want.  Perhaps maybe next time your humans can get you a longer one?  Keep slithering there where you are my friend.

.

.

.

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FRIENDS – Please remember that Dear Bacon can’t happen without YOU.  Please email me your pictures and letters 🙂

 

Dear Bacon

 Dear Bacon, Going undercover these days is a hard job. I thought I would go inconcheeto. It seem to be working too. That is until I got hungry and ate my disguise. Drats. Busted again. You ever go undercover? Signed Inconcheeto

Dear Inconcheeto, I’m sorry. What was the question? I saw your disguise and immediately got the munchies. Snorts. Oh that’s right, do I ever go undercover? Sure. When I go to sleep in my toddle bed at night. Double snorts and rolls with laughter. Keep practicing my friend. You are looking good.

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Dear Bacon, I’m a great hunter. I go out deer hunting with my master all of the time. I’m very determined and can smell a deer a mile away. Nothing slows me down ever as you can tell from this great picture of me. Signed Nose to the Ground

Dear Nose to the Ground, Perhaps – and this is just a mere suggestion – you might want to look up and around every once in a while. I’m just saying. You might see a little more of your “environment” when you do. Snorts – carry on.
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Dear Bacon? Really? My human finds me in this predicament. Does he help? Of course not. Oh no. The human has to snap a few pictures first before rescuing me. Really? What the kitty heavens is this world coming to? Signed Disgusted Kitty

Dear Disgusted Kitty, There is only one thing that I can say in this kind of situation – payback. I think some well placed fur balls in some slippers would be adequate. Happy pay back 🙂

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Dear Bacon, Okay ladies. Here I am. I’m giving away free kisses. Whatcha think pig? Can you beat this? Signed Stud

Dear Stud, That’s quite the costume you have there friend. Don’t you worry. I can get all the ladies I want and I don’t need a costume. All I need is this cute little snout and sexy pot belly. Beat that – snorts.

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Dear Bacon, I think I may need some help. I read how your dad looks at you with this hunger. I think my dad is doing the same thing with me. Can you help? Signed Spud

Dear Spud, Oh dear piggy heavens above. Okay my friend. First off, walk away from the ledge in which you stand and get to a safe place. I’m calling DDFS (Department of Dog and Family Services) right now. Be safe.

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Remember my friends – keep the letters and pictures coming so we can continue Dear Bacon issues.  

 

National Junk Food Day

 

Journalist Rocky the Squirrel here –

Keeping his paws on the nuts of the world –

.

Oh chitter-chatter.  I think this is a day that we *all* have been looking forward to all year long – National Junk Food Day.  Today, July 21st, we can eat all of the junk we want – hopefully without calories!  Today being National Junk Food Day gives us a chance to eat anything and everything we can put our greedy little hands/paws/hooves on and not feel one bit of guilt.  Potato chips, dips, Cheetos, pretzels, ice cream, nuts, french fries, milkshakes, pizza – what’s your pleasure for today?

Personally, I think today is going to be a race here at the Hotel Thompson to see who can eat more junk food – Bacon or his daddy… oh and don’t think Bacon’s mom won’t participate.  She’s been doing that four lettered bad word – diet – I’m sure she will enjoy her own as well!