Dear Bacon

 

Dear Bacon – I read your columns.  I follow your blog.  I think you are like the coolest pig ever representing all of us other pigs in the world.  There’s no reason why us piggies can’t be spoiled just like a pooch or a kitty.  We have feelings too.  I’ve even got my humans following you now so they can see that spoiling us piggies is the ‘in’ thing to do now.  I just wanted to throw a shout out to you and say thanks dude.  Signed Hamhocks

Dear Hamhocks – Thank you my friend.  I’m honored that you and your humans follow my blog and columns.  That means a lot to me and touches my little piggy heart.  Keep getting spoiled my friend – it’s the way life should be for us oinkers!

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Dear Bacon – I made a grave mistake.  I wanted out.  My humans let me out without looking.  Mr Stupid … I mean Mr. Bear was out there waiting for me.  I want back in now but the humans went on to do something else and don’t hear me screaming.  Help.  Signed In and Out Cry for Help

Dear In and Out Cry for Help – Oh my friend.  Hopefully that fence between us will keep Mr. Bear away from cute little you.  Seeing how this happened, you might want to rethink in the future, the in and out situation of driving the humans crazy.  When something bad happens, they ignore you.  Kind of like the boy who cried wolf.  Stay sweet my friend.

 

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Dear Bacon – There I was minding my own business and the tomcat next door starting singing to me ,watching me like a voyeur and trying to get my attention.  He is so like weird.  I think my face says everything I do believe.  He needs to hit the high trails and go hit on some other kitty.  This kitty is so not interested.  Signed Hit the Road Jack

Dear Hit the Road Jack – Snorts with piggy laughter.  I think your beautiful face says everything my sweet friend.  You are *so* not interested.  Perhaps he will get the drift soon.

 

 

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Dear Bacon – I was minding my own business.  I’ve been watching my humans play with this computer like thing for days pounding keys and laughing like a jackass.  I thought when they went to the adult potty, I would jump over to see what was so funny.  I don’t see anything that is so hysterical.  The pounced the keys with my claws and didn’t get it.  I jumped down before the human came back.  But unfortunately the computer thing told on me and captured me in the middle of my investigation.  How rude huh?  Signed Busted

Dear Busted – Oh I hate those computer things that tell on us.  Who do they think they are?  Perhaps bring it something wet and toss it on those stupid key things.  Maybe then it will learn to respect you.  I’m just saying – snorts with piggy laughter.

 

 

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Remember my friends.  Dear Bacon can’t happen without *you*.  Please remember to email me your letters and pictures ❤

 

 

It’s ALL a Conspiracy Theory

That’s it!  I’ve totally figured it out my friends.  It’s *all* a conspiracy theory.  It really is.  I finally know after all these years.  I know I’m rambling but I get that way when I’m overly excited.  Okay – let me breathe.

Alright here it is – I’ll explain it to you.  Samsung has come out with a refrigerator that allows you to see inside of it without opening the door.  It’s kind of like a piggy porn movie.  No really it is.  I can see all of the lovely stuff inside but I’m stuck behind an iron gate and can’t get to it kind of situation.  But, it gets worse.  Some of these refrigerators allow you to access them from your cell phone to see what is inside of them.  Yep, no joke.  You are doing your grocery shopping and you are wondering, “Do we need eggs?”  You can access an app on your cell phone to look inside of your refrigerator to see how your egg status is.  Now what about that?  Scary huh?

It explains everything.  You still don’t get it?  Okay let’s further explore Samsung.  My television in my bedroom is Samsung.  It’s a flat screen.  Now let’s just think about Samsung.  If they now have the technology to put a camera in a refrigerator to check out what is in the refrigerator who is to say they didn’t have this type of technology years ago and was secretly testing it in televisions.  Hey it could happen.  I mean it really makes sense.  How else would mom know at times that I’m not asleep in my bedroom and I’m playing.  My Samsung television is secretly watching me, taking my pictures and sending them to mom’s cell phone.  I’m telling you her cell phone is powerful!  Because when I get up in the middle of the night, it’s like mom knows!  She always tells me, “Go back to sleep Bacon, no playing.”  How does she know?

Even better – daddy’s cell phone is a Samsung.  Now this is even scarier.  Sometimes mom leaves daddy what they call a honey do list during the day when she goes to the worky place.  At times mom calls home to ask daddy if he has done something.  Of course, he tries to snow her over and say yes.  But she always knows.  How is that possible?!  I do believe daddy’s Samsung cell phone is telling on us and what we do when mom is away.  It has to be.

So you see now you understand what I mean when I say it is all a conspiracy theory.  Samsung is out to get us all.  Do you have Samsung products in your household?  If so, now you know!   Personally, now I’m off to look for hidden cameras around the Hotel Thompson.  They have to be here – I just know it!

 

Spies Like Us – REMINDER

FELLOW ANIPALS – Now is the time to send your humans out of the room – this post is just for us – anipals UNITE!

 Forrest and I have been talking this morning.  The deadline for Spies Like Us is this Saturday, AUGUST 9, 2014.

Entries can be sent to my email at baconthompson@gmail.com

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We really need your help my fellow anipals.  Our humans do this to us all of the time.  They take pictures of us in compromising pictures and send them all over the world for everyone to see. You know they do it!  Heck, we all know they do it.  You’ve seen my Dear Bacon issues on Tuesdays.  *Now* is the time to get those humans of ours back.  SPIES LIKE US are made for well US.

Take that picture or video of your human doing something so crazy and send it to me by Saturday, AUGUST 9, 2014.  Me and Forrest need YOU for this my anipals.  Put on those cameras… tip toe through the house as stealth and quiet as you can… send those submissions in to me.  

Me and Forrest will post later on in the month of August for the voting to begin.  WE CAN DO THIS!

 

Spies Like Us – REMINDER – DUE DATE EXTENDED!

FELLOW ANIPALS – Now is the time to send your humans out of the room – this post is just for us – anipals UNITE!

 Forrest and I have been talking this morning.  We are going to extend our deadline for Spies Like Us to Saturday, AUGUST 9, 2014.

Entries can be sent to my email at baconthompson@gmail.com

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We really need your help my fellow anipals.  Our humans do this to us all of the time.  They take pictures of us in compromising pictures and send them all over the world for everyone to see. You know they do it!  Heck, we all know they do it.  You’ve seen my Dear Bacon issues on Tuesdays.  *Now* is the time to get those humans of ours back.  SPIES LIKE US are made for well US.

Take that picture or video of your human doing something so crazy and send it to me by Saturday, AUGUST 9, 2014.  Me and Forrest need YOU for this my anipals.  Put on those cameras… tip toe through the house as stealth and quiet as you can… send those submissions in to me.  

Me and Forrest will post later on in the month of August for the voting to begin.  WE CAN DO THIS!

– EXAMPLE OF HUMAN CRAZINESS –

I took this picture off of mom’s iPhone when she left it on the sofa.  This is a perfect example of human craziness.  OMP (oh my pig!)

I don’t know what daddy was doing in this picture but it shows him perfectly – he is C.R.A.Z.Y.  He might have been showing his inner tiger or is that inner kitty – snorts.

Whatever it was, it is forever captured in a photograph now.  Tell me he was growling… please.  Shakes piggy head.  He sure is crazy.  See what I live with here at the Hotel Thompson.  Walks away muttering crazy daddy of mine!

 

Spies Like Us – REMINDER!

Oh Dear Piggy Heavens.  Forrest and I have been at it again.  Talking seems to bring out the evil in us – which is a good thing – snorts.  You know us anipals see a lot in our homes.  We hear a lot too.  Our humans can and are CRAZY.  Sometimes that CRAZY leads to borderline insane which is hilarious by our standards.  As my friend Forrest said in a recent email to me:

“Humans are nuttier than squirrel turds.  The wheels are spinning but the hamsters have run away”.

Hey, us anipals know that’s the truth.  So, we’ve been talking about conducting a little Blog Hop contest called appropriately “Spies Like Us”.  Our mission as anipals (if you wish to accept) is to video, take pictures or tell us about something your humans have done.  We all know we have nutcases as our staff.  Here’s our chance to proof it.  Think hard about something crazy.  Something insanely stupid.  Something that we just won’t believe.

Send your submissions to either me or Forrest by AUGUST 1, 2014.

We will then post them and take a poll to see who wins.  What does the winner get you ask?  Well, the winner will get a badge letting the world know that they have the craziest humans ever!  Now that is something to brag about.

So put on your spy glasses, get out your cameras and start snooping around the house creeping up on your humans… like we need an excuse to do that – snorts.

My email:  baconthompson@gmail.com

– EXAMPLE OF HUMAN CRAZINESS –

Remember this picture of my dad that I took several months ago?  Auntie Sharon sent the head band back with Bashful went he came back home from Australia.  Mommy put it in the curio cabinet with our other collectibles from Bashful’s field trips.  Mommy went to bed early with a headache and daddy thought he was super ninja – snorts.  He forgot about me having the camera and trust me, I used it.

Not only did he put the head band on, turned on ninja warrior music and was dancing, he got CAUGHT by mommy.  That almost made him fall on his bum – it was a hoot.

So friends – this is what we are talking about.  Catch your humans in crazy like this and send it to me or Fozzie.

You can do it SPIES LIKE US!

 

Spies Like Us

Oh Dear Piggy Heavens.  Forrest and I have been at it again.  Talking seems to bring out the evil in us – which is a good thing – snorts.  You know us anipals see a lot in our homes.  We hear a lot too.  Our humans can and are CRAZY.  Sometimes that CRAZY leads to borderline insane which is hilarious by our standards.  As my friend Forrest said in a recent email to me:

“Humans are nuttier than squirrel turds.  The wheels are spinning but the hamsters have run away”.

Hey, us anipals know that’s the truth.  So, we’ve been talking about conducting a little Blog Hop contest called appropriately “Spies Like Us”.  Our mission as anipals (if you wish to accept) is to video, take pictures or tell us about something your humans have done.  We all know we have nutcases as our staff.  Here’s our chance to proof it.  Think hard about something crazy.  Something insanely stupid.  Something that we just won’t believe.

Send your submissions to either me or Forrest by AUGUST 1, 2014.

We will then post them and take a poll to see who wins.  What does the winner get you ask?  Well, the winner will get a badge letting the world know that they have the craziest humans ever!  Now that is something to brag about.

So put on your spy glasses, get out your cameras and start snooping around the house creeping up on your humans… like we need an excuse to do that – snorts.

My email:  baconthompson@gmail.com

 

Holla!

Personally, I think mom was born with a camera attached to her hands.  Every time I turn around, there she is like a person on vacation snapping pictures.  Most kids have a baby book, I have volumes…and video tapes.  Sigh – what’s a pig to do around here for a little privacy?  Sometimes I have to sneak off to my room just for a little ‘me’ time.  I know it’s all in good fun but I do draw the line when I’m in the shower.  I mean mom, I don’t take pictures of you in there now do I? 

 

 

 

 

So, here’s another picture that mom took of me while I was playing around on the floor.  Dad’s tray just mystifies me.  I like to poke around it.  On occasion, I’ve been known to toss it.  It’s what I do – I’m a pig looking for adventure.  🙂

 

 

So you see, I’m never alone.  I look to the future and I don’t want to say it too loudly but I know mom.  I would not be surprised if she puts a camera in my room soon so everyone can see me live watching my television and playing around.  Sshhh – there will go all of my privacy so keep it quiet from her okay. 

Hogs and Kisses!