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Dear Bacon

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Dear Bacon – They are right when they say the eyes are the first to go. These days, I’m having to wear glasses just to get around the neighborhood.

I know other dogs make fun of me and it kind of hurts my feelings. What should I do? Signed Four Doggy Eyes

Dear Four Doggy Eyes – Hey guy, if it helps you to see I wouldn’t care what other dogs think about it. One day, they are going to experience problems as well. They are being doggy bullies and you know what.

Bullying is totally unacceptable in any form in any way – humans or animals.

Hold your head up high my friend. Wear those great looking glasses with pride!


20130319-114747.jpgDear Bacon – Around these parts, they call me Sheriff Groucho. I love protecting my house and yard wearing my outfit. Sometimes, the humans even walk me through the neighborhood and so I can protect and serve other animals in the hood. It’s what I do. Signed Sheriff Groucho

Dear Sheriff Groucho – Hey, I like the look. I think it’s great that you are taking care of your neighborhood like that. If only other animals great and small would take charge and take back their own neighborhoods, it would be a wonderful place to live. Almost like Mr. Rogers neighborhood. I could see me living there.

Keep up the great work my friend. I think you deserve a pat on the back and a good job well done!


20130319-114802.jpgDear Bacon – You talk about your mommy reading you bedtime stories all of the time. I like to read my own. I especially like Dr Seuss Go Dog Go. Have you read it? Signed Smart Pooch

Dear Smart Pooch – I haven’t heard of that book. I’m going to have to get mom to get a copy so she can read it to me one night. Thanks so much for the suggestion. I love how you hold your book. I only wish my hooves could accomodate that move.


20130319-114824.jpgDear Bacon – You know riding a hog is just not for the humans – no pun intended. Sometimes on nice days outside, I like to jump my bike and ride. I like to feel the wind going over my body.

Do you like to ride? Signed Harley the Frog

Dear Harley the Frog – I like that bike. I absolutely love the color. Your legs are a tad bit longer than mine. I have short legs unfortunately.

It would be fun to feel the wind blowing through my hair though. I may have to see what I can do about that. Keep riding my friend and stay safe.


20130319-114959.jpgDear Bacon – Some days, it doesn’t pay to even get out of bed. On this day in fact, I went from on top of the bed to under the bed. I just passed out and slept until the world was nicer to me. Do you ever have those days? Signed Pooch in Life

Dear Pooch in Life – I do have days where I go back to my bed until I feel better. It’s not every day. It just seems like some days Mother Nature is out to get you and throws lemons at you. Instead of passing it on to the humans, I sleep it off as well. I don’t have the back sleeping going on like you do but it looks comfortable!

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12 Comments

Posted by on 04/24/2018 in Bacon, Dear Bacon

 

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Bedtime at the Hotel Thompson

Bedtime.  Doesn’t that one word make you smile?  Bedtime means a lot of things to a lot of different peeps and anipals.  Some love the thought of sleep and bedtime.  While others can’t stand the thoughts knowing they will have another restless bout of insomnia.  Mom and sleep are like frenemies.  She loves to sleep however sleep doesn’t love her.  Now with the exercise she has been doing lately, sleep comes easier these days than what it once did.  And thank goodness mom doesn’t sleep walk anymore – that’s entirely different posting than today’s – trust me on that – snorts with piggy laughter.

Today I want to talk about bedtime.  You know that one moment at night when bedtime is called and everyone rushes around trying to ‘get ready’ for bed.  Now, let me start by asking this question to you.  At the Hotel Thompson, when it comes time for bed who is the last in bed every night?  Is it moi, Houdini, Hemi, mom or dad?  Go ahead, guess and right that name down.  I’ll wait.  Taps hooves – insert Jeopardy music while waiting.

Finished?  Okay let’s proceed.  Now, mom is usually the one that calls bedtime.  She works and is on a strict sleep schedule with the same routine every night.  That helps her with her insomnia and sleep walking.  Pretty much when she goes to bed, we all go to bed.

Mom tells me to get ready for bed and I’m a good boy.  I will waddle out, do my business and get in my toddler bed in my bedroom waiting for mom to tuck me in for the night.  Usually she brings me a small treat.  So yeah I’m going to be a good boy for mom.  Wouldn’t you?  And I’m not a dumb pig.  Sometimes mom will rub my back until I fall off to sleep.

That brings us to Houdini.  That word bedtime is almost like snack time to that kid.  He will rush down the hall and beat mom to the bedroom.  He jumps on the bed and snuggles down in his blanket and is usually counting dog bones before anyone else

That Houdini is almost part cat I do believe.  He takes a gazillion naps a day and still sleeps throughout the night.  Mom says its because he plays so hard when he is awake and with all of that energy – he zonks out better than any of us.

Hemi.  Well Hemi is a lot of things but when you call bedtime he is there.  He will get him a drink of water, go potty and then tap-tap down the hallway to mom/dad’s bedroom taking his place with royalty at the top of the bed on his pillow.  He lets nothing get in his way during his night time ritual.  And if anyone is in his spot, he will push them away.  I mean heck, he let’s us all know that he is king here at the Hotel Thompson.

Alright then let’s check on things.  Who thought it was one of us anipals who was the slowest in getting to bed at night?  Go ahead, raise your hand.  You can lower them now.  You would be wrong.  It is *not* one of us anipals – shocker huh?  And we all know it can’t be mom.  I mean heck with her sleep problems, she has to be spot on in getting to bed the same time every night…. unless it’s the weekend or a special outing.  Other than that, she has brushed her teeth, put all of us anipals to bed, taken her medicine and is in bed with her head on her pillow counting sheep.

Dad is the culprit.  So who guessed dad?  You would be correct!!  Mom said that telling dad that it’s bedtime is like telling a 2 years to get ready for bed.  And trust me friends, I have watched and can confirm this.  Even us anipals look at daddy like really?  Now we know dad is a grown man and can go to bed anytime he wants.  But if mom let him, he would stay up all night watching old movies on television which is fine on the weekends but during the week we all have schedules to maintain.  So don’t take this too serious folks – we area all snortable anipals and peeps here at the Hotel Thompson – by all means you do know our sense of humor.  With that being said though, this is how it usually goes here at night during the week:

9:00PM – Okay kids, let’s start getting ready for bedtime.  That’s usually when all of anipals get up and do our business while mom bushes her teeth and takes her medicine.

9:05PM – Dad hasn’t moved from the sofa that he’s sleeping on.  Mom touches dad shoulder, wakes him and tells him to get ready for bed.  He grumbles ok and stirs slightly.

9:15PM – Mom has finished up, puts us all to bed, gives us kisses and goes back to wake dad again.  She then goes to wash her face.

9:20PM – Dad starts to move.  Slowly goes to put on pajamas.

9:25PM – Mom is finished and goes to the bedroom to put on her jammies.

9:30PM – Dad decides he needs a drink and goes to the kitchen.  Then he decides he needs to take his medicine so he goes back to the bedroom to get it and back to the kitchen for another drink.

9:45PM – Dad *finally* comes back to the bedroom and then has to get the night time medicines ready for him and mom for the next night.  (There’s only four pills – two for the each of them – but dad takes a lifetime to do it as we all hear mom tell him).  Laughter can be heard from mom/dad.

10:00PM – Dad decides he then has to go to the bathroom to brush his teeth and go potty.  In the meantime, mom is in the bedroom setting dad’s side of the bed (they have a Select Comfort and he likes it 100 – talk about sleeping on concrete – WOW).  Then mom pulls the sheets down and climbs into bed all the while fussing at daddy to hurry up and that molasses are faster than him.

10:15PM – FINALLY daddy comes back to the bedroom chuckling and saying that he is not slow and that mom is just fast.  Rolls piggy eyes – that starts more laughter.  Then daddy finally gets into bed and him and mom find hands to hold.  Why?  Because once upon a time a very long time ago mom/dad read about how otters sleep holding their mates hands so they don’t drift apart.  Every since then, mom/dad hold hands while they sleep so they don’t drift apart.  Cute huh?   They talk about each other being their otter and how much they love each other.  More giggles and a kiss goodnight.

 
20 Comments

Posted by on 03/10/2017 in Bacon, Hemi, Houdini

 

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31 Days of Spook – Children Say the Darnedest Things

Sometimes, little ones can say the darnedest things when you are least expecting it.  They say that children are more ‘open’ to the paranormal.  After reading these stories below, do tell me what you think. Have you ever been told anything of this nature by a child?


A few years ago, I was putting my friend’s daughter to bed for the night.  She was about three at the time and she was fighting going to sleep.  She asked me why she had to go to bed and I said, “Because it is late and it’s time for little girls to get a good night’s rest.”  

She then pointed at nothing across the room and said, “What about that little girl?”


I was heading to the bathroom on the second floor of my aunt’s house when I saw my cousin April on the stairs.  April was four and very animated.  She was busy making funny faces while sitting on the stairs.  I asked her what she was doing and she said, “I’m copying the lady with the braid.”  I looked around and there was no one else but us.  I asked, “Where is the lady April?”  She pointed to a beam running parallel to the stairwell.  I asked April, “What is the lady doing?”  She said, “Making funny faces.”  I smiled and started walking up the stairs again when April said something that stopped me in my tracks.  “Her braids are wrapped around her neck.”  I turned back and and asked April to repeat herself.  April pointed and said, “The lady is hanging by her braid, she’s making funny faces.”  Then April started making a face which I then realize was as if someone was gasping for air.


I watched a few kids while their parents were at a movie.  I put the youngest kid, age 4, to sleep and watched television downstairs until the parents came home.  The next day, the parents called me.  According to the 4 year old, I stood inthe doorway and stared at him for a very long time just smiling.  

 

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Snorticles

 
8 Comments

Posted by on 09/10/2016 in Bacon

 

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Dear Bacon

Dear Bacon – I’m not sure what happened.  First the human was standing in front of the refrigerator door.  The next thing I knew, the human fell down like that Humpty Dumpty dude.  I have to admit the human made a pretzel look pretty everyday the way they curled up and bounced.  Do your humans ever do anything like this?  Signed I’ll Give That a 10 out of 10

Dear I’ll Give That a 10 out of 10 – First, I wouldn’t be any kind of friend without asking is your human okay?  Did they get back up after their yoga move?  I’m saying yoga move because humans put themselves in all kinds of weird positions when they do that stuff.  In fact, I have to admit that I’m pretty impressed with your move on top of the refrigerator.  What do you call that?  Upward kitty stance?  Just be careful.  I’ve heard that first step off of the refrigerator can be a booger bear – the floor doesn’t give.


Dear Bacon – This sucks.  Trust me – leave the work stuff to the humans.  Getting up at an ungodly hour is bad enough.  But then the humans have to dress up in these clothes – eeww.  How do they not pee on themselves wearing this stuff?  Signed Help Me!

Dear Help Me!  Oh I know my friend.  I don’t envy mommy going to the work place ever.  First you have to dress up then you have to drive there.  Then apparently you put up with a lot of crap and there are no treats.  What the heck do they work for?  Shaking my head.  Stay at home for as long as you can.


Dear Bacon – The humans are so fickle.  I hear them talking about this diet stuff all of the time and how they don’t eat and how the scales are nothing but lies and they don’t understand why they are not losing weight.  Breathe.  I know.  I know everything.  You see, I sit here on my perch in the dark at night.  I know why they are not losing any weight.  They are coming into the kitchen at night and eating out of the fridge and cabinets.  Doh – that’s why they are not losing weight.  Do your humans do this?  Signed The Watcher

Dear The Watcher – In a word – YES.  My humans do this too.  Then they yell at the scales at the end of the week.  Hilarious is what I call it.  My mom calls the scales a perpetual liar every week.  Of course, sometimes she doesn’t know that I have my hoof on the back of it – snorts.


Dear Bacon – You give a child an inch and they take a mile.  I told little Rusty he could play in front of the tree.  What does the little tyke do?  He climbs the tree.  Why do I care?  Because then he started squealing like someone was taking away his honey.  He was stuck and couldn’t get down.  What are we going to do with the children these days?  Signed Mommy Bear

Dear Mommy Bear – You know I feel you but you have to admit that the little guy is cute stuck on the side of the tree there.  Good thing he has those nice long nails to hang into the bark.  Give him a break this time okay.  He’s learning life and he’s still a kid.  Let him be a kid for as long as he can.  Kudos to you being a great mom!

.


Remember friends – Dear Bacon can’t happen without YOU.  Please continue sending me your letters and pictures to my email address.  ♥

 
20 Comments

Posted by on 05/03/2016 in Bacon, Dear Bacon

 

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Cookie Monster

20130220-081615.jpgI couldn’t resist posting this.

I absolutely snorted and rolled around laughing so hard when I found it.

I had to show it to mom and dad and they also got a kick out of it.  Mommy told me I had to put in on here in hopes that all of my friends get a great chuckle from it as well.

mmm – I’m kind of craving chocolate chip cookies myself now – I wonder why?  Snort

 
18 Comments

Posted by on 03/05/2016 in Bacon

 

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Bedtime Rituals

Do you have a bedtime ritual?  Something that you do every night before Mr. Sandman visits you?  Me being a piggy – Ireally demand a schedule.  When my schedule is off, so is my cute little personality – snorts!.  For instance, every night mom starts putting me to bed around 8:30pm.  I say start because I have a routine here at the Hotel Thompson.

At 8:30pm, mom tells me it’s time for bed.  We go into the kitchen to get my bedtime snack and a drink of water.

At 8:45pm, I’ll start wobbling down the hall to my bedroom.  I’ll take care of my ‘business’ and get into my toddler bed.

At 9:00pm, mom com20130601-001219.jpges into my bedroom to tuck me into bed and kiss me good night.  Sometimes she tells me a story.  Sometimes she sings to me and pets my back until I fall asleep.  Other times, she sets the timer on my television so I can watch one of my favorite shows for a while before I fall asleep.

At 9:15pm, mom puts Houdini to bed.  He’s not one for bedtime stories – he thinks he’s too big for that.  Can you believe it?  So, she rocks him and puts his onsie jammies on and tucks him in for the night.  Rotten little guy – rolls piggy eyes and snorts with laughter.

At 9:30pm, mom and dad go to bed.  Mouse Girl and Hemi follow them cause they sleep in their room on the big bed.  Hemi snuggles right between mom/dad and has to touch both of them.  Mouse Girl sleeps at the bottom of the bed and stretches as far as she can between mom/dad’s feet.

So, do you have a bedtime ritual?

 

 
27 Comments

Posted by on 11/06/2015 in Bacon, Hemi, Hemi and Mouse Girl, Houdini

 

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