Let me start by saying that this posting has LOTS of food in it with pictures. You know my mom and dad – they are professional eaters. They get into trouble every possible way. They called a field trip this past weekend. There is a restaurant about 30 minutes away called The Vortex Bar and Grill in an area called Little Five Points. They say it’s awesome. First off, it’s a bar and most of the workers have tattoos and no one under the age of 18 can come into the restaurant. I guess that leaves me out since I’m just over two – snorts.
This is daddy posing outside of the entrance to the location. I know I’ve talked about this restaurant before but I’m not sure if I’ve posted pictures of the awesome food – which mom and dad say is awesome…. shuffles hooves… I wouldn’t know because someone didn’t bring me home a piggy bag.
Like I was saying, the front of the building near the entrance has the huge skull that you walk through. Scary looking huh? You can see the name of the restaurant on the side to the right of dad’s head. NOTE: Someone told mommy that it looks like daddy has rabbit ears over his head from the jaw line of the skull. Snorts – I think it does too. You?
The day that mom/dad went, there was no line. Usually the line is out the door. Inside of the location, it’s dark and cozy. Mom and dad say the inside is rather small so the tables are tight. You make friends really quick – snorts.
They started off with a Mighty Meaty Chili. This is how the menu describes the chili – menu wording not mine – just remember that :
“Made with ground sirloin, chipotle & habanero peppers and a secret combination of seasonings but no beans ’cause it’s MEATY. It’s definitely got some heat to it so please don’t order if you’re a big pussy”
Yep, that’s what it says. The picture to the left is of the cornbread that comes with the chili. Daddy says you really needed that because the chili was H.H.O.O.T.T. Thank goodness mom and dad split a bowl – snorts.
Mom and dad followed the spicy chili up with an appetizer of Cheddar Balls O’Glory. That’s what I’m talking about – cheese balls. Licks piggy lips. And of course, I’m going to tell you the wording off the menu… why? Because it’s so interesting 🙂
“A plate full of beer-battered, deep fried balls of cheddar cheese, served with jalapeno ranch dressing. These are by far the tastiest balls you’ll ever put in your mouth. You know you want some, so just bite our cheesy balls”.
Now with all of this wonderful food so far, you know the main meals have to be out of this world! And yeah, mom and dad wanted to sample a lot.
Dad ordered what they called a Meat Packer Melt –
“A sirloin patty topped with sliced turkey, ham, American, Swiss and cheddar cheese all griddled together on swirled rye bread. This is the best patty melt you have ever put in your mouth.”
Dad says this was the bomb! It was deliciously served with tater tots – one of his favorites. The last time he came here, he ordered the Double Coronary Bypass and trust me – he almost had one! He had plenty of leftovers that time. This is what it is:
“One big half pound sirloin patty topped with two fried eggs, six slices of American cheese and eight slices of bacon served between two grilled cheese sandwiches that we use in place of the regular hamburger buns.”
And mom, we can’t leave mommy out. She went grandstand too. She got the Cubano De Libertad.
“A fresh baked roll filled with slow roasted pork, ham, Swiss cheese, sliced pickles and spicy mustard grilled flat and drenched in Mojo sauce.”
Okay – let me add that this little oinker was not harmed in the making of mom’s lunch. See, that’s how she does me. She runs off and eats pork. Shakes my piggy head. At least she didn’t order the sandwich they call, “Three Little Pigs”… I don’t even want to know what’s on that one – Snorts.
So, that’s my wild humans. If you want to see more of the menu, look here at Vortex. It is by far great reading, mouth watering and delicious sounding. You gotta check it out if you get a chance. Happy Eats!
I’ve read your column recommending yoga and how everyone thinks its the best thing since sliced bread. I’m not a fan. I’m not sure what this position was suppose to be but it’s not natural. I guess it’s not meant for everyone.
Well, you do look like you’re a little tied up there. What’s it like to be able to kiss your own butt? Snort
So I walked into a bar and ordered a beer. What’s wrong with that? I’m of age. Why not think its strange that the bartender served me?
Why does it have to be me with a problem?
I don’t see a problem with that. If you can (A) walk into a bar; (B) order your own beer; (C) sit at the bar and (D) drink it, I say you deserve it. I salute you!
Do you ever have one of those days that you don’t know if your coming/going? If you need to eat or go wizzy? I had a moment and of course my dad had to take a picture. Who knows where it will show up next on the Internet. Signed Two Birds With One Stone
Dear Two Birds With One Stone,
Hey little man, no worries. Sometimes life happens. You’re hungry and you have to go. I’ll tell you a little secret. At times when I go wizzy for mom on my piggy pad, she will feed me a carrot while I’m going. Hey, whatever you gotta do my friend for food, do it.
I’m like you. I have a short leg challenge. There’s lots of things I can’t do either because of those challenged little legs. I found the perfect solution – stilts. They do take some getting used to but hey no more short legs. You gotta get a pair of these things and try them. Signed Vertically Challenged
Dear Vertically Challenged,
You do look a lot taller. Mine would have to be taller. You know, to make room for my garage of a belly. 🙂 snort They do look like fun. I’m wondering if I could get mom to make me some for fun? I’ll keep you posted.
Oh piggy heavens above! Oh my friends. I hate to be the one to tell you this but there is a deadly virus going around these parts. You need to protect yourself STAT! It’s awful and can hit you at any time.
In fact, the virus is called Weekly Overload Recreational Killer (WORK). If you come in contact with the WORK virus, you should immediately go to the nearest Biological Anxiety Relief (BAR) center to take antidotes known as Working Isolating Neutralizer Extract (WINE), Radioactive UnWORK Medicine (RUM), Bothersome Employer Elimination Rebooter (BEER) or Vaccine Official Depression Killing Agent (VODKA).
Barks! Happy Friday friends. Hope you have been having an awesome week so far. It’s down hill from here – I can see the light of the weekend. Hopefully this weekend I can rest and relax with mom. Last weekend, I went for my yearly wellness check. This is me and my doc, Dr. Waggoner. He’s a pretty cool guy for sure. He said I was in good health and my weight was great – isn’t that what we all want to hear? In fact, my weight was actually down a little from last year. Dad was worried because someone has been giving a few extra treats here/there. So no worries daddy – bring me some more treats – barks!
Mom said I was her sweet little trooper today. I got three shots and not one single time did I whimper or cry. See, I was a big boy ❤ And I don’t have to go back for another year – now *that* is awesome.
Now, I leave you with Jokes with Daddy – I know you can’t wait for that. Have a great weekend dear friends.
Barks! Oh friends – how was your week? Mine was just barky wonderful! I want to show you a new toy that I got last weekend during the great Snowmageddon here in the south. It’s a Bark’s Woof Beer bottle. It’s made of hard plastic and has a squeaky toy in the bottom part of the bottle. It’s the cutest thing and mom/dad fell in love with it when they saw it in the store. They just knew I would love it – don’t you?
They brought it home and gave it to me. Oh my doggy heavens! You should have seen me dragging it around the Hotel Thompson, squeaking and playing with it. It was a blast! Mom took this picture of me on the couch. I actually fell asleep with the bottle in my mouth. Mom said I couldn’t hold my woof beer. Barks with piggy laughter!
Hello sweet friends – Happy 2017!! Can you believe we finally made it to the new year? We stayed up a little to watch the fireworks. We had an awesome seat right in our front room at the Hotel Thompson where we could see out the window. Some peeps in the hood went crazy – I don’t know how they even had fireworks left for midnight there were so many. We were all okay as long as mom/dad were in the living room. And with the noise, we all got to sleep in the big bed with them. Now that was awesome!
This was one of the pictures that mom took of me and dad on New Years Eve. Me and dad were having a blast. I just love sitting behind him on the pillows and looking over his shoulder. You know – someone has to keep him in line – barks with puppy laughter!
So with the new year comes new Jokes with Daddy – are you looking forward to this? Today’s Jokes with Daddy is a little special. You’ll see what I mean. Have an awesome Friday sweet friends!
Hello sweet friends! We survived it – Halloween is now behind us and gone for another year. I’m kind of excited about that. Why? Because that means Thanksgiving and Christmas will be here before you know it. Now I know we have some stumbling blocks at the end of November – namely that evil Elf on the Shelf here that calls himself Don Juan. But, we got this my friends. We can so do this in anticipation of the fat man at Christmas. Have you gotten your Christmas list started yet? I’ll tell you a secret – come closer. Mom/Dad have actually already started. Can you believe that? I think both of them are more excited for Christmas this year than I have seen them in a very long time.
So friends – I hope you have a wonderful weekend – we plan to run errands here this weekend. And we all know what that means — mom’s lap won’t be here. But don’t worry – I will get my lap time. I’m a Yorkie. I demand it – barks to you!!
Barks my friends! I’m still looking for the *perfect* costume for Halloween. Since we have been watching a lot of football lately, I thought I could be a quarterback so I dressed up in my football jersey – it comes with shoulder and back pads. What do you think? You think coach will call me in to play? I’ve been know to run around the Hotel Thompson with my football and mom/dad can’t catch me at all. I may be small but I got me some good legs.
How has your week been? Last weekend, us anipals had mom/dad all weekend. We never let them leave the Hotel Thompson – not even once. I guess it helps that Bacon hid mom’s Jeep keys – barks with puppy laughter. So this weekend, mom/dad have a LOT of errands to run around and get done. It kind of stinks but we all look on the bright side knowing that mom will pick us all up something special from the market. That we can’t wait for! So do you have anything planned for this weekend?
I leave you now with Jokes from Daddy. Hope you enjoy sweet friends!