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Dear Bacon

Dear Bacon – Busted!  But I tell you, I was set up.  Really I was.  You see, I saw the two legged kid in the house outside the other day making what he called mud pies.  I thought why couldn’t I make one?  They look delicious.  And trust me that kid was covered but no he didn’t get into trouble.  I get out there and start making pies and the entire world is coming to an end.  What do you think of that?  Signed Pie Maker

Dear Pie Maker – Personally, I don’t think that is the kind of pies that you eat.  Perhaps you can roll around in it to be cool – my kind has been doing that for years.  But to eat – shakes piggy head no.


  Dear Bacon – The humans left the house – check.  Got my bath in – check.  Got my robe on – check.  Got my snacks – check.  Got the remote – check.  There I was preparing to watch my show on television, America’s Top Bitches, then it happened. The humans came back home early.  What the cream cheese?!  What did they expect I was going to do while they were out – lay on the floor and take a nap?  Signed Comfy

Dear Comfy – I’m with you on that one my friend.  If my humans came home during my show, they would just have to pull up, sit down and shut up until the show was done.  I mean we are talking priorities here.


Dear Bacon – Help!?  My humans they watch Star Wars way too much.  This is how they are dressing me up for Halloween.  Lord help me.  One of my humans will be Darth Vader and the other Luke Skywalker.  Then there’s me in the middle.  The nerve of them to make me go out in this attire!  Signed Princess Leia

Dear Princess Leia – I got a couple of things to say my dear.  First – hubba hubba.  I love that outfit on you – you are gorgeous.  I’m sure the real Princess Leia is full of envy with the way you wear that hair.  Second up – you have to admit that the costumes will be original and that’s awesome.  Just think you will stand out among your peers.  Everyone will want to be you.  And you know for doing this, you will probably get extra treats.  I say wear it with style and look on the bright side you gorgeous babe!


  Dear Bacon – This is how we greet our human when he comes home from work.  This just shows to him what we think of him as royalty by being his welcome committee.  What do you think?  Signed Two Statues

Dear Two Statues – It’s okay my friends.  You can tell me.  You really stay there when he comes home to remind him of the royalty YOU are and that it is feeding time.  It will be our little secret and we won’t tell.  Zip – not a word.  I wish our stairs could support me on them… what am I talking about?  We don’t have stairs – snorts!


Dear Bacon – This photobomb thing has gone too far.  Every time I try to take a picture to post on my Pet Harmony account, this dog jumps in either behind, beside or in front.  What am I to do?  Signed Looking for Love

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Dear Looking for Love – Shaking piggy head.  You know my friend, brothers/sisters can be a pain in the rump in the house.  Might I suggest you to post HIS picture on Pet Harmony.  If he had a friend, he would surely leave you alone.  That would give you more time to find you a mate.


 

Remember my dear friends that Dear Bacon can’t happen without YOU.  Please keep sending your pictures and letters to my email address.  

 
14 Comments

Posted by on 10/24/2017 in Bacon, Dear Bacon

 

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Dear Bacon

Dear Bacon – Do you need a kiss?  Cause I’m here for YOU my sexy little piggy.  When my human asked me what I wanted to be this year for Halloween, I knew.  A kiss just for YOU.  You help all of these people in the world and I want to help you.  What do you say?  You wanna dress up with me?  Signed Chocolate Kisses

Dear Chocolate Kisses – What can I say?  That’s a proposition that I just can’t turn down.  And why would I, right?  So I tell you what I’m going to do.  I’m going to get mommy to dress me up as a giant peanut butter cup … cause you know chocolate and peanut butter go together, right?  I’ll keep you posted on my outfit okay.  Until then, Happy Halloween.


Dear Bacon – Why do humans want to dress us anipals up this time of the year?  Can you answer that for me please.  I mean I get it that they want to dress up, go door to door and have parties.  But, why us anipals?  Why do we have to get pulled in to their hysteria?  Let us stay at home alone and do our thing.  Cause what the humans don’t understand it that we will party our own way, am I right?  Signed Ted in Disguise

Dear Ted in Disguise – AMEN!  You said it perfectly.  Yes I agree that the humans don’t understand that we will celebrate this Halloween holiday in our own right.  Let them go out and do their thing – we will do our thing.  Take for instance me.  This little oinker has worked all month long on my 31 Days of Spook.  By Halloween, I’m going to be exhausted and barely moving.  When the humans go out for the night, I’m hitting the big bed, turning on the big television, setting the Select Comfort to around 65 and that’s where you will find me snoozing and snoring.  Is it Halloween yet?  Have fun on your night my friend.  And let me tell you something – I think you are dressed up enough with those glasses.  I love them!


Dear Bacon – Help!?  My humans they watch Star Wars way too much.  This is how they are dressing me up for Halloween.  Lord help me.  One of my humans will be Darth Vader and the other Luke Skywalker.  Then there’s me in the middle.  The nerve of them to make me go out in this attire!  Signed Princess Leia

Dear Princess Leia – I got a couple of things to say my dear.  First – hubba hubba.  I love that outfit on you – you are gorgeous.  I’m sure the real Princess Leia is full of envy with the way you wear that hair.  Second up – you have to admit that the costumes will be original and that’s awesome.  Just think you will stand out among your peers.  Everyone will want to be you.  And you know for doing this, you will probably get extra treats.  I say wear it with style and look on the bright side you gorgeous babe!


Dear Bacon – The humans left the house – check.  Got my bath in – check.  Got my robe on – check.  Got my snacks – check.  Got the remote – check.  There I was preparing to watch my show on television, America’s Top Bitches, then it happened. The humans came back home early.  What the cream cheese?!  What did they expect I was going to do while they were out – lay on the floor and take a nap?  Signed Comfy

Dear Comfy – I’m with you on that one my friend.  If my humans came home during my show, they would just have to pull up, sit down and shut up until the show was done.  I mean we are talking priorities here.


Due to Halloween, we are repeating some of our more hilarious letters.  Hope you enjoy my sweet friends ❤

 
13 Comments

Posted by on 10/11/2016 in Bacon, Dear Bacon

 

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