Dear Bacon

14 Nov

Dear Bacon,
Spiders eeww.  Nobody likes them man.  I’m sorry little dude.  I saw one on the floor.  It was huge.  There was no other place to go.  The evil thing was in the doorway threatening my manhood.  I jumped on the first thing I could to get away from it.  Sink be it.  This is how my master found me.  This doesn’t make me less of a dog does it?  My fear of spiders?  Signed Sweetness

Dear Sweetness,

Well, it might take you down a couple of notches.  You’re name my take you down a few more.  You are my fellow friend are a dog.  A big dog at that.  You could have easily walked over that little spider and saved you some grace.  Unless that spider is as big as you, you are the bigger person.  Start dogging up.


20121120-062145.jpgDear Bacon,
Hey dude.  I read your blog all of the time.  I see people talking about yoga and I’ve seen some of the positions.  I gotta lot of stress in my life.  I thought I would try it.  WOW – it works great!  This is my zen trunk position.  It took me a long time to get the balancing together but it’s great now.  Have you tried it yet??  Signed Stingphant

Dear Stingphant,

That’s amazing!  I’m going to have to try some of these positions in my room when no one is looking, especially that Hemi.  It helps out in stress huh?  I really don’t have that much stress but I think over the holidays I’m going to try it.  I’ll keep you posted.


20121120-062543.jpgDear Bacon,
Who says zebras can’t be fast?  I’m tired of being the underzebra in the bush getting chased all of the time. I bought me a bike and it is the bomb!  Those pesky little cats can’t catch me anymore.  Whatcha think?  Signed Einstein

Dear Einstein,

I’m amazed!  First of all, you have the talent to ride a bike.  Second of all, I would have never thought about doing that to escape the cat.  But I do have a question.  How are you going to feel that thing up with gas when it runs out?  Just a thought to think about.  Stay safe my striped friend!

20121120-062701.jpgDear Bacon,
I love the water.  I just can’t get enough of it.  My favorite sport is water skiing.  Everyone said that due to my size that I would never be able to participate.  Well, I proofed them wrong.  Don’t let anyone say that you can’t do something.  You can.  Signed Geoffrey

Dear Geoffrey,

I’ve got to admit that if you can do that, I can do some of the things that I want to do in my life.  There’s nothing that can hold us back.  Thank you so much for the inspiration!

20121120-062807.jpgOkay pig –

You think *you* have problems with those pesky purr things.  I have problems.  My master has pet mice.  You know where I’m going.  You can’t eat the pets.  But this, this is taking things a little too far and asking me too much.  What am I to do?  Signed Heathcliff

Dear Heathcliff,

WOW – mom does walk around telling me not to eat the cats.  I don’t.  I may tug on their tails a little but it’s all out of love.  But mice hanging around the head.  Oh buddy, there’s got to be a line somewhere and that’s pushing it.  You might need to leave the room when the master has those play things out wondering around.  I can hold back a lot but that – no way!  Be strong!


Posted by on 11/14/2017 in Bacon, Dear Bacon


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5 responses to “Dear Bacon

  1. samanthamurdochblog

    11/14/2017 at 1:39 am

    I am TOTALLY with Sweetness on his spider reaction…! 😱😸😱😸

  2. Amy

    11/14/2017 at 8:09 am

    I am also with Sweetness. Mice? Ok if not on my head. Spiders? Run for the hills! (or the counter top)

  3. Genevieve Petrillo

    11/14/2017 at 9:03 am

    I’m with you, Sweetness. Sorry B. Spiders make me jump up and down like a popcorn. Mom says I am no help. I’m just trying to stay alive over here…..

    Love and licks,

  4. NylabluesMum

    11/14/2017 at 3:00 pm

    Poor Heathcliffe!! Mee wood not appurciate REEL mousiess hangin out on mee either! An Stingphant iss toe-tallee ZEN!
    Mee finks you mite have been a bit ruff on Sweetness doggie. Spydurss can scare thee Bee-Geess out of BIG Hu’manss!! LadyMum who iss no teeny purrson freekss out toe-tallee when a spydur showss uppy here….mee finkss sweetness has been traymmytized an needss sum furr-apee purrhapss. Not that mee wantss to go against you sweet Unccle Bacon….mee ADOORSS you!
    **nose bumpsss** Siddhartha Henry xxxx

  5. CarolMaeWY

    11/14/2017 at 3:38 pm

    I’m so proud of Geoffrey learning to ski. It’s not easy and takes muscles. But it’s so fun.
    My husband would jump and hide if he could when he seees a spider so Sweetness, your not the only male afraid of spiders.


This piggy would love to snort with you :)

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