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Dear Bacon

12 Sep

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Dear Bacon – Listen fellow swine.  How do you get it made so easily?  I live outside.  I don’t get my own room in the house.  Heck, the closest I get to the house is what they call a dog house.  I don’t get air conditioning or room service…let alone turn down service at night with bedtime stories.  Tell me pig – tell me how you got all that.  Signed Bushwhacked

Dear Bushwhacked – I’m sorry little dude.  My adopted parents didn’t have children and wanted a baby to nurture.  They picked me.  It was the best choice they could have made.  Some of us just get lucky that way.  You have nice things too.  You get to run and play outside and roll in the mud.  It’s not all luxury at Hotel Thompson.  I have to take weekly baths – can you imagine?!  I also have to live with 2 cats.  You think I got it made – those things think they rule the roost here.  I have to keep them in line.  Hang in there dude.  The grass is not always greener on the other side of the railroad tracks.


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Dear Bacon – Welcome to the wild side.  I’m a wild crab.  I like to party.  I like to boogey.  What say you come to the beach and let your wild side down for a change.  Signed Crabby Cakes.

Dear Crabby Cakes – Uumm, no.  You really shouldn’t smoke dude.  It stunts your growth.  Look at yourself in the mirror.  Thanks for the offer though.  I respect your lifestyle.  I’m just not a party pig.


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Dear Bacon – I hear you talking about your two purr brothers all of the time.  I would love to meet them.  They could take Catarate with me.  This is one of my moves that won me a medal at the CatOlympics.  I could probably even teach you a couple of new tricks.  Signed Catarate the Puss

Dear Catarate the Puss – Never underestimate my two purr brothers, especially Hemi.  I think they would definitely enjoy your classes.  I just don’t think *I’m* ready for the outcome of those classes… if you know what I mean.  Congratulations on your medal at the CatOlympics.  Keep up the hard work.  By the way, I’m digging your outfit.

 

❤ Snorts with piggy laughter ❤


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Dear Bacon – I’m a heavy metal squirrel rocker.  Down to my squirrel collar and earring.  I’m bad to the bone.  When I’m in the neighborhood hunting nuts, people just hand them over to me.  That’s how bad I am.  Maybe we can come up with a look for you little man.  What do you think – punk pig?  Signed Punk Squirrel

Dear Punk Squirrel – Okay, I’ve seen it all now.  I do appreciate your Mohawk.  I sport one myself from time to time.  As for the ear ring – I leave those to mom.  The squirrel collar, I don’t care for.  I don’t like anything around my neck.  My mom learned that a long time ago.  The look is cute though.  You can lose the cigarette and still look punking.  Why burn down your home in the tree with all of that smoke?  Rock on!

 

 
18 Comments

Posted by on 09/12/2017 in Bacon, Dear Bacon

 

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18 responses to “Dear Bacon

  1. easyweimaraner

    09/12/2017 at 1:50 am

    don’t smoke dear friends… it’s eggs-pensive in any way… and it is nuts… oh maybe therefore punk squirrel has a cigarette?

     
    • Piglove

      09/12/2017 at 1:03 pm

      Snorts and rolls with piggy laughter. I have to admit that Punk Squirrel is my favorite. Snorts with piggy laughter. XOXO – Bacon

       
  2. CarolMaeWY

    09/12/2017 at 3:24 am

    You have quite the characters this week Bacon. You response is right on. . .

     
    • Piglove

      09/12/2017 at 1:03 pm

      Aaww. Thanks sweet friend. XOXO – Bacon

       
  3. angelswhisper2011

    09/12/2017 at 4:50 am

    MOL…Punky and Crabby smoking has stubbed out, also for cool animals like you, so better get yourself a nice trip with some of my nip…MOL 😀 Pawkisses for a Happy Day 🙂 ❤

     
    • Piglove

      09/12/2017 at 1:04 pm

      Head up. Someone mention nip? I wonder if that stuff would work for me? XOXO – Bacon

       
  4. evilsquirrel13

    09/12/2017 at 9:56 am

    That squirrel needs a different kind of cigarette…. the kind that makes you mellow. Let the crab get lung cancer for all I care…. he’ll still taste the same at Red Lobster.

     
    • Piglove

      09/12/2017 at 1:05 pm

      Oh snaps and rolls with piggy laughter. Hilarious. I could go for some lobster right about now. XOXO – Bacon

       
  5. Tails Around the Ranch

    09/12/2017 at 11:03 am

    Awk, humans corrupting anipals with cigs?! What have we done? The shame of it all.

     
    • Piglove

      09/12/2017 at 1:06 pm

      Shame on the humans, right? Now where did I put my beer? Snorts and rolls with piggy laughter. XOXO – Bacon

       
  6. Cupcake

    09/12/2017 at 12:37 pm

    You’re right, as usual, B, however; if Bushwhacked wants to take a stand, maybe he can just follow his mom into the house and see what happens! And maybe he can Facebook Live the event. I want to see her face!

    Love and licks,
    Cupcake

     
    • Piglove

      09/12/2017 at 1:06 pm

      Snorts with piggy laughter. Now that I would love to see. XOXO – Bacon

       
  7. Nylabluesmum

    09/12/2017 at 6:53 pm

    Mee-you Unccle Bacon maybee you could inntroduce Punk Squirrel to Crabby Cakess an they can pawty together!!! Good idea yes?? 😉
    An Katarate kat iss so-o kewl……mee wantss to take lessonss frum him…do you have his email addy or fone numburr?? Mew mew mew…
    Grate collum purr usual Unccle!
    ***nose bumpsss*** Siddhartha Henry =^,.^=

     
    • Piglove

      09/14/2017 at 2:25 pm

      Wouldn’t they be suck cool Anipals to hang with sweet nefkitty. XOXO – Bacon

       
  8. Miss Harper Lee

    09/12/2017 at 10:49 pm

    I think Punk Squirrel is the one I hear laughing at me from the top of the tree when I walk by. Keep smoking those ‘cigs, Punk Squirrel. They’ll do a number on your lungs and pretty soon you won’t be able to outrun me. Haha!

     
    • Piglove

      09/14/2017 at 2:27 pm

      Aaww beautiful. If I was close, that squirrel wouldn’t be laughing at my girl. XOXO – Bacon

       
  9. Amy

    09/13/2017 at 7:29 pm

    Who is this Katar who ate the cat?

     

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