Unanswered Questions

Oh snorts!  I recently saw this on mom’s Facebook account and I just had to share my friends.  How many of you can relate to this too?

 

I am 40 and I just realized I still have so many unanswered questions!?!?!

I never found out who let the dogs out… the way to get to Sesame Street… why Dora doesn’t just use Google Maps… why we don’t ever see the headline “Psychic Wins Lottery”… why women can’t put on mascara with their mouth closed… why “abbreviated” is such a long word… why lemon juice is made with artificial flavor yet dish-washing liquid is made with real lemons… why they sterilize the needle for lethal injections… and, why do you have to “put your two cents in” but it’s only a “penny for your thoughts” where’s that extra penny going to… why do The Alphabet Song and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star have the same tune… why did you just try to sing those two previous songs… and just what is Victoria’s secret? …and do you really think I am this witty ?? … I actually stole this from a friend, who stole it from his brother’s girlfriend’s, Uncle’s cousin’s, baby momma’s Doctor.

 

Travels in the South

Oh sweet friends – welcome back to another edition of Travels in the South.  Today we bring you some entertainment.  While Fozziemom and Fozziedad were visiting, all decided to go to Tybee Island, Georgia.  Once there, they were hungry and thirsty so went across the street to one of mom/dad’s favorite restaurants called Bernies.

Last week, on this post here – I showed you some of the food that they had at the restaurant – strips of bread and beer cheese and buffalo shrimp.  Who could ask for anything more?  Well these four would ask for something more – snorts with piggy laughter.

You see, Bernies sells an alcoholic concoction that they call Jell-O shots.  Not just any Jell-O shots but Jell-O shots in different flavors and topped with Pop Rocks.  Yep Pop Rocks – you know the little candies that pop in your mouth and was the roar years and years ago.  Well mom thought hey ya’ll, let’s do some Jell-O shots.  And everyone was like sure why not we’ve never had any before.  So the table of Jell-O virgins had shots all around all in different flavors.

You take a little stirring stick and break the Jell-O from the sides and then gulp in down in one or two swallows.  At the time of swallowing, you have the magical Pop Rocks popping in your mouth.  Well one Jell-O shot led to several Jell-O shots and the table was feeling great.

So great was the Jell-O shots that even Bashful had to get into the action.  And we all know that rock likes his alcohol for sure!  So everyone left the restaurant in good spirits and walked back across the street to their hotel.  Now last week, I hinted at something extra that my mom did with her circus wig.  So now, I’m going to tell you what she did.  Come closer.

Everyone went to their rooms and it was decided that they would change into swimsuits to go to the pool, which was right across their rooms.  So mom changes into her swimsuit and giggles like a school girl in the bathroom.  She comes out with her robe and tells daddy what she did.  Daddy falls across the bed he is laughing so hard.  Mom then goes over to the joining door to Fozziemom’s room and knocks.  Fozziemom answers and she tells Fozziemom that she needs her opinion in something.  Fozziemom was so quick to say sure what do you have.  Mom then opens up her robe showing her bathing suit.  And let’s just say mom put that wig ‘down under’.  She then proceeded to ask Fozziemom if she thought mom needed to shave before going to the pool.  Honest truth.  That shows you how whacked my mom is.  Snorts with piggy laughter.

So until we meet again – cheers!