Dear Bacon

Dear Bacon – I’m not sure what happened.  First the human was standing in front of the refrigerator door.  The next thing I knew, the human fell down like that Humpty Dumpty dude.  I have to admit the human made a pretzel look pretty everyday the way they curled up and bounced.  Do your humans ever do anything like this?  Signed I’ll Give That a 10 out of 10

Dear I’ll Give That a 10 out of 10 – First, I wouldn’t be any kind of friend without asking is your human okay?  Did they get back up after their yoga move?  I’m saying yoga move because humans put themselves in all kinds of weird positions when they do that stuff.  In fact, I have to admit that I’m pretty impressed with your move on top of the refrigerator.  What do you call that?  Upward kitty stance?  Just be careful.  I’ve heard that first step off of the refrigerator can be a booger bear – the floor doesn’t give.

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Dear Bacon – This sucks.  Trust me – leave the work stuff to the humans.  Getting up at an ungodly hour is bad enough.  But then the humans have to dress up in these clothes – eeww.  How do they not pee on themselves wearing this stuff?  Signed Help Me!

Dear Help Me!  Oh I know my friend.  I don’t envy mommy going to the work place ever.  First you have to dress up then you have to drive there.  Then apparently you put up with a lot of crap and there are no treats.  What the heck do they work for?  Shaking my head.  Stay at home for as long as you can.

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Dear Bacon – The humans are so fickle.  I hear them talking about this diet stuff all of the time and how they don’t eat and how the scales are nothing but lies and they don’t understand why they are not losing weight.  Breathe.  I know.  I know everything.  You see, I sit here on my perch in the dark at night.  I know why they are not losing any weight.  They are coming into the kitchen at night and eating out of the fridge and cabinets.  Doh – that’s why they are not losing weight.  Do your humans do this?  Signed The Watcher

Dear The Watcher – In a word – YES.  My humans do this too.  Then they yell at the scales at the end of the week.  Hilarious is what I call it.  My mom calls the scales a perpetual liar every week.  Of course, sometimes she doesn’t know that I have my hoof on the back of it – snorts.

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Dear Bacon – You give a child an inch and they take a mile.  I told little Rusty he could play in front of the tree.  What does the little tyke do?  He climbs the tree.  Why do I care?  Because then he started squealing like someone was taking away his honey.  He was stuck and couldn’t get down.  What are we going to do with the children these days?  Signed Mommy Bear

Dear Mommy Bear – You know I feel you but you have to admit that the little guy is cute stuck on the side of the tree there.  Good thing he has those nice long nails to hang into the bark.  Give him a break this time okay.  He’s learning life and he’s still a kid.  Let him be a kid for as long as he can.  Kudos to you being a great mom!

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Remember friends – Dear Bacon can’t happen without YOU.  Please continue sending me your letters and pictures to my email address.  ♥