Dear Bacon

 

Dear Bacon – Me and my friend Hazel were just out running around the hood minding our own business.  We crossed the street.  There I said it!  We crossed the street!  Humans went all weird on us and started snapping pictures.  I don’t get it.  What’s the big deal?  Signed Two Chicks

Dear Two Chicks – I don’t get it either my friend.  Shakes piggy head.  I look forward to that day where the motives are not questioned of two chicks out for a good time crossing the road and humans not going all wild laughing and pointing.  I do feel for you.  Just chill and carry on is what I say my friends…. oh and stay out of traffic might be more advice 🙂

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Dear Bacon,  I don’t get it.  I honestly don’t get it.  You see I work in a conservatory park.  Humans come by on boat rides to see us gators out in the wild.  There was this one guy that was leaning a little too far over the boat and his sunglasses fell off his head.  I was just trying to do the right thing.  I got them and was swimming closer to the boat for him to get them.  Do you know he wouldn’t reach out and get them?  What a thank you huh?  Signed The Manners of a Gator

Dear The Manners of a Gator – How ungrateful. You mean to tell me the human would not reach over the boat, into the river, onto your head and get his glasses?  What was he thinking?  Oh doh!  Maybe – and this is just a stretch here – maybe he thought you might be like one of those other gators.  You know the ones who like to bite the hand that touches them.  I’m just guessing that.  Maybe you can leave the sunglasses on the bank of the river for him to retrieve after the trip.  I’m sure he will appreciate that. Awesome job my friend!

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Dear Bacon – HA!  You see I’m there in the front – the white pooch.  We were all standing around at my buddies house telling jokes.  Who would have thought the guys would take one of my jokes so personal.  You know how us guys can be with the boys.  Someone happened to say that I wasn’t the great lover like they were.  When I told them that their mother didn’t think the same thing, they all got personal and started chasing me.  Who would have thought huh?  Signed Who Let the Dogs Out

Dear  Who Let the Dogs Out – Shakes piggy head.  Boys will be boys talking smack and getting into trouble.  You know what I say my friend?  If you can’t take the heat, stay out of the kitchen.  Some people just have no room for jokes and having fun.  Keep running out first though – 🙂

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Dear Bacon – You should have been here pal!  We all planned our weekly play date at the beach with our humans.  While they talked and drunk their Starbucks coffee, we sat on the sand.  We held hands, sung kumbaya and talked about our humans.  It was great fun.  We would have loved if you could have joined us!  Signed The Great Foursome

Dear The Great Foursome – oh WOW!  That looks like so much fun my friends.  The next time I’m out your way, count me in!

 

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