Dear Bacon

Dear Bacon, Do you recognize this look my friend?  You know the doorbell rings but you are running around in your birthday suit.  You answer it from the corner wondering, “Who would come over without calling first” kind of look in your face.  You are secretly wishing it’s a girls scout selling cookies but oh no – it’s only someone selling something.  You give them this eat crap and die look before shutting the door.  No offense solicitors but unless you have thin mints, go to the neighbors house.  Signed Don’t Bother

Dear Don’t Bother,  YES I recognize that look.  Once all of the humans have settled into the Hotel Thompson, it’s a no bother zone unless you phone first – especially after dark. Shivers – I’ve seen too many shows on the Investigative Discovery channel.  No way am I opening the door.  And you are right… unless they have thin mints.  They could be someone from a horror show but if they are selling thin mints, I’m grabbing the boxes

---

Dear Bacon,  You know sometimes I really hate my siblings.  They tell me that I chase butterflies too often grinning like the Cheshire cat and singing Disney songs. What’s it to them?  Who’s a happy gator – this guy!  Can’t we all just be happy and get along?  Signed Chomp

Dear Chomp,  I’m with you my bud.  I’m singing Hakuna Matata right now in my head.  It’s such a happy song all about no worries for the rest of your lives.  If you don’t know it, I highly recommend you looking it up and playing it.  It’s great and perky – just a song for chasing butterflies.  Be yourself and don’t let your siblings bully you into something you’re not!

---

 Dear Bacon, I’ve called this meeting here today to talk to you about your little brother Houdini.  You know us dogs have skills.  We can be your allies or we can be your enemies.  You don’t want us to be your enemies.  I’m just saying.  This face may look all cute and everything but my inner dog is 500 pounds just like Houdini’s.  You might want to rethink your relationship with the little guy.  We can come in handy for a lot of things.  Signed Fluffy

Dear Fluffy,  Oh my friend, there is no doubt about the skills of you pooches.  Houdini is my little buddy.  Sometimes I even let him sleep with me in my bed at night.  He’s a great guy and helps me out with the purr things here all of the time.  Especially that Hemi who uses my butt like a slapping post.  No worries – I know ya’ll rule!

---

 Dear Bacon, Score for the little dog!  I’ve been watching the humans and where they get my food.  Oh barks!  One day when they weren’t looking, I was able to get into the bag of heaven and SCORE!  Oh dude – I was in puppy heaven for a while until the master caught me.  But by that time, I had eaten half of the bag.  I was so fat I couldn’t walk.  I was rolling around with a silly happy grin on my face.  You ever done this before?  Signed Rolly Polly

 Dear Rolly Polly,  Snorts!  I ❤ this my friend.  I’ve never gotten into the bag before.  But once when I was Nana’s, I ate so much that I couldn’t even squeak I was so pudgy.  I was uncomfortable for a while but like you – it was so worth it!

---

 

Dear Bacon,  I hate it when the humans make me dress up.  We had to go to a wedding this past weekend and they insisted on me wearing a tux.  Really?  I’m a dog.  Rolls doggy eyes.  Tell me they don’t make you dress in this ridiculous outfit.  Signed Mister Doggy in the Wedding

Dear Mister Doggy in the Wedding – I have to admit pal that you make that tux look good.  Really you do.  Sometimes we have to do things that we really don’t want to do but need to do.  That was probably one of those situations.  I don’t particular have to dress up… yet.  But can you believe Houdini here has a tux. 🙂  It happens to the best of us.  Wear it with pride!

---

Remember my friends – we can’t have Dear Bacon without your letters and pictures.  Please keep sending them to me – snorts and thanks!