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Dear Bacon

10 Jun

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Dear Bacon,

Listen the water is fine my four legged pot bellied piggy.  Why don’t you come for a swim with me.  I’ll even teach you how to swim under the water.  I’m sure you will catch on fast.  What do you think?  Signed Mr. Friendly

Dear Mr. Friendly,

Not that I don’t appreciate your well… friendness but I think I’ll pass.  For some reason, I think it’s better for this little oinker to stay on dry land, far away from the water and far, far away from your swimming lessons. Call it a premonition if you will.  But, carry on my friend and thank you… really.

.

.

20140330-183825.jpgDear Bacon,

The nerve of our family vet.  Can you believe that (A) they had the nerve to come near my captains quarters with that proby thing and (B) they told my humans that *I* needed to go on a DIET?!  What in the world was he thinking?  Don’t my humans pay for his sound advice?  What kind of crap advice is this?  I think the look on my face tells you everything I think.  Signed Tiny

Dear Tiny,

Oh dear.  That proby thing is awful.  It must be a torture device from centuries long ago.  Yep, that’s what I think.  And that look on your face.  Oh my.  You are certainly not happy.  And well… looks down at my pot belly.  I am one NOT to give any advice to you on that four lettered dirty word – D.I.E.T.  Shakes head – nope.  Not the one to do that at all my friend.

.

.

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Dear Bacon,

I see you – purr snicker.  I have my eyes on your activities good or bad.  I’m reporting back to that Evil Elf of yours Don Juan.  You just wait.  You’re going to get it when he comes out in November.  Signed The Watcher

Dear The Watcher,

Really?!  It’s not bad enough that I have rogue elf that watches my every move, you’re going to as well?  Rolls piggy eyes and walks away.  This is so not fair in this oinker’s life.  Can’t we all just get along?  Snorts

.

.

20140330-183847.jpgDear Bacon,

I hate it when I get into trouble here at my casa.  Can you believe that my humans make me face the couch and sit here in time out?  It’s so humiliating.  Signed Unhappy Pooch

Dear Unhappy Pooch,

WOW my friend.  That is some look you have there facing your tomb of doom.  It’s just not right.  And to put you in this time out right in the middle of the living room where you can hear and see all of the fun activities going on around you.  Shakes piggy head and clicks tongue.  Nope, just not right.  I’m sorry pal.  Maybe when you come out of serving your time, you just ignore those humans.  Show them who is getting timeout there.  Don’t give them any affection.  None whatsoever… can you last like what five seconds?  Hang in there my bud!

.

.

Dear Bacon,20140330-183858.jpg

I double kitty dare you to try this maneuver.  Heck, I triple meow dare you.  I dare you to put your back legs up over your head.  In fact if you can do this position, I will personally come over every day and give you a piggy massage – heck I’ll even clean up your room for you.  Signed Fear Factor Feline

Dear Fear Factor Feline,

Really?!  That’s okay my furry friend.  That’s what I have my mommy for – massages and cleaning – snorts.  Let’s hope that cannon of yours doesn’t go off while you are bent legs over head.

.

.

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Remember anipals – keep your pictures/questions coming.  Send them to me at baconthompson@gmail.com

 
28 Comments

Posted by on 06/10/2014 in Dear Bacon, Uncategorized

 

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28 responses to “Dear Bacon

  1. sunsetdragon

    06/10/2014 at 2:42 am

    Good stuff sweet Bacon

     
    • PigLove

      06/10/2014 at 8:51 am

      Thank you my dear friend! XOXO – Bacon

       
  2. sakuraandme

    06/10/2014 at 3:33 am

    Afternoon Bacon,

    Once again you had me laughing to the laptop. Hey can I get that massage?? LMAO

    Hope you had a great day. Hugs from Oz, Paula xxxx

     
    • PigLove

      06/10/2014 at 8:52 am

      aaww – thank you my sweet pal. I would love a massage as well. Have a great one! XOXO – Bacon

       
  3. wallaceandsamuel

    06/10/2014 at 5:47 am

    Wise decision re: the swimming lesson invite Bacon!
    Wally & Sammy

     
    • PigLove

      06/10/2014 at 8:53 am

      Snorticles. It just looked like something was up with that invite… like many teeth – XOXO – Bacon

       
  4. fozziemum

    06/10/2014 at 7:31 am

    Bwahahaahaha oh dear the somersault was a goodun…very flexible..and as for mr Croc or alligator…hmmm nup wise move..a 4.3 metre croc grabbed a bloke from his boat up North this week…..and that was it….so keep your hooves out of the water 🙂 hugs Fozziemum xxx

     
    • PigLove

      06/10/2014 at 8:54 am

      squeal and screech! OMP (oh my pig!) That water is scary… it makes me want to rethink that pool in my backyard. Shivers. XOXO – Bacon

       
      • fozziemum

        06/10/2014 at 9:06 am

        All good Bacon backyard piggy pools are safe 😉 hugs and loves Fozziemum xx

         
      • PigLove

        06/10/2014 at 9:39 am

        Breathes out – that’s a good thing to know my friend. Thanks! XOXO – Bacon

         
      • fozziemum

        06/10/2014 at 9:52 am

        Yes I have my own views on the incident up north…let me run this by you…a 60 something year old man and his son and daughter in law…get in a small boat..travel in a croc infested river (which had only just been reopened due to large crocs) and the croc grabs him as he is emptying something out over board…I think someone wanted a good pic opportunity and it back fired….call me suss but I have been in a bigger boat in croc waters and was told do not even lean over the side(which I kinda did to get baby croc pics) …

         
      • PigLove

        06/10/2014 at 11:02 am

        Oh dear piggy heavens!! I think you might be right. People think it can’t happen to them and BOOM there you go and it’s the gators fault. WOW. XOXO – Bacon

         
      • fozziemum

        06/10/2014 at 11:05 am

        I know they found the dude after killing the croc and opening it up..people are not too bright Bacon 🙂 off to beddies my sweet have a great day 🙂 hugs and loves Fozziemum xx

         
      • PigLove

        06/10/2014 at 12:31 pm

        aaww sweet dreams!! XOXO – Bacon

         
      • fozziemum

        06/10/2014 at 7:50 pm

        I did have sweet dreams my friend 🙂 hugs and loves Fozziemum xxx

         
  5. winterblueangel

    06/10/2014 at 8:27 am

    Haha very good edition of Dear Bacon. I am sure you did the right thing in forgoing the swim lessons. Hopefully you will be getting your little pool anyway! 🙂

     
    • PigLove

      06/10/2014 at 8:55 am

      I hope so for the pool. Makes me weary now what might lurk beneath the water – shivers. XOXO – Bacon

       
  6. Reilly & Denny

    06/10/2014 at 8:40 am

    hmmmm that kitty yoga could have you all tied up in knots

     
    • PigLove

      06/10/2014 at 8:56 am

      Tell me about it. I just don’t get it. I watch the purr things here all of the time do things like that. Even daddy is amazed at the back paw about your right ear kind of situation. Dear Lord – are they missing a spine? snorts. XOXO – Bacon

       
  7. easyweimaraner

    06/10/2014 at 9:22 am

    You could wear a mankini while taking a bath with Mr. Friendly … bet he couldn’t close his mouth with amazeness :o)

     
    • PigLove

      06/10/2014 at 9:39 am

      That is so true – SNORTS. XOXO – Bacon

       
  8. onespoiledcat

    06/10/2014 at 10:26 am

    HAHAHAHAHA! Great advice for all your buds who wrote in this week Bacon…..I particularly liked your advice to the kitty with the “loose cannon” yoga pose. Danger-danger!

    Hugs, Sammy

     
    • PigLove

      06/10/2014 at 11:02 am

      Snorticles – I think you may be right cousin. THAT is one extreme maneuver. XOXO – Bacon

       
  9. purrfectkitties

    06/10/2014 at 1:52 pm

    Oh My Kats! We’re so glad you passed on the offer of that alligator! There was something fishy about that offer… just saying… 😉 Have a PURRFECT day! 🙂 xoxo Roxy & Tigerlino ❤

     
    • PigLove

      06/10/2014 at 2:30 pm

      Snorticles – I know! I think he had some ulterior motives for that. XOXO – Bacon

       
      • purrfectkitties

        06/10/2014 at 2:47 pm

        Yeah, never trust a big-mouthed dude in a green suit! There’s always something off with them… And just look at his smug expression! He seems way to pleased with himself…
        xoxo Roxy & Tigerlino ❤

         
  10. Pink Ninjabi

    06/11/2014 at 8:41 pm

    Hahhahah

     
    • PigLove

      06/11/2014 at 8:52 pm

      Thank you! XOXO – Bacon

       

This piggy would love to snort with you :)

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