Dear Bacon

Dear Bacon,
They always say that grass is always greener on the other side.  Well, I stuck my head through the fence to look at the other side.  And you know what?  It doesn’t look greener.  Can you hear what I’m saying pig?  It does *not* look greener.  Signed Mythbuster Goat

Dear Mythbuster Goat,
Thank you for letting me know that.  I’ve always wondered about the grass being greener on the other side.  I just never knew what the other side was.  Now I do.  You’ve helped *me* out so very much. 

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Dear Bacon,
What?  I’m only helping my brother out in getting all of the crumbs on the bottom of the bowl.  Really?  Cause you know all of the good stuff is on the bottom of the bowl.  Honestly.  Signed Chef Paw

Dear Chef Paw,
I will take your word for that.  Take it from an expert who is used to getting all of his crumbs, it’s much easier just to flip the bowl over.  That way, you can get some of the crumbs as well.  Just a tip my friend….and thank goodness your brother wasn’t drinking water.

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Dear Bacon,
I was having a dream that I was fixing to eat the biggest hot dog in the entire world.  It look so delicious.  I could almost taste it.  Then I woke up cause I bit my paw.  What a let down.  Do you ever dream of eating food?  Signed Dog Dreams

Dear Dog Dreams,
Snorticles.  Do I ever have those dreams – snorts.  That’s like asking me if I’m hungry.  Of course I have those dreams.  I can’t say though that I’ve ever tried to eat a paw or hoove.  My legs are too short to reach my mouth – thank goodness!That must have been a mighty good dream my friend.

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Dear Bacon,
Where are the clothes pins when you need them?  Sometimes I just need a few to pin back the wrinkles on my head.  That way, maybe my tongue wouldn’t fall out of my mouth when I’m sleeping.  You think?  Signed Rip Van Pup

Dear Rip Van Pup,
I feel you my friend.  I totally feel you.  Sometimes when I sleep, everything wonders into their own zipcode.  My mom feels the same way.  All it means though is you are totally relaxed and comfortable in your environment.  That’s a good thing. 

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Dear Bacon,
Bottoms up!  I saw the pictures you had of Bashful at Tybee Island last October.  They really intrigued me.  I thought I would stick my head in the ocean to see if I could find Sponge Bob and Patrick.  I didn’t see them but got a lot of water in my trunk.  And by the way, does this ocean make my butt look big?  Signed Scubaphant

Dear Subaphant,
I’m so sorry little guy.  Bashful saw Spongebob at Tybee last year because they were doing a movie on the island.  I think afterwards he went back home to Hawaii.  But I say, keep looking cause you never know where he might wash up on shore.  As far as your butt, it looks just fine.  I only wish mine was that cute!

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Friends – don’t forget to send your questions and pictures to me at Baconthompson@gmail.com