Daily Archives: 12/20/2013
That Evil Elf on the Shelf
Go ahead, you can admit it. That little Elf on the Shelf is evil looking. You just *know* he’s up to trouble. What? You don’t know who he is? Well my friend, you might just be one of the lucky ones during this holiday season.
The Elf on the Shelf: A Christmas Tradition came out in 2005 in a children’s book. The little Elf that comes with the book has a job between Thanksgiving and Christmas Eve. His main job is to watch over the household and report back to the North Pole nightly on if the people are naughty or nice. He comes back to the household by morning. There’s one important thing about the Elf. You don’t touch him as doing so will erase any Christmas magic that has been blessed upon him. Every morning that he comes back from the North Pole, people in the household find him in different places. But remember, it’s all magic!
Cute story idea huh? Sure it is. But, have you seen this Elf? Look to the left. Shivers – he’s kind of a got a look in those eyes that makes you not want to turn your back to him. And the idea of having him watching ‘over’ your household and reporting back to Santa every night, that’s kind of eerie. It’s great on one hand when small children are in the home. They walk the line with this little guy around. I’m not sure if they are afraid of getting caught being naughty or if they are just plain scared of the psycho Elf. He kind of reminds me of clowns… and that makes me want to run to my bedroom and hide under my toddler bed.
But I digress. We have a Elf on the Shelf at the Hotel Thompson. Mom insists on dragging him out of the attic (great place for him all year) for Christmas. There’s no kids here unless you count us anipals and daddy. But mom insists. Every Thanksgiving, Elffie comes out and the story book is read. And the good thing about these elves, you get to name yours. Don’t ask me why because I believe it has to be a twist on a twist but ours is named Don Juan. How ironic huh?
I’ll be the first to admit that I’m afraid of that little six inch freak and so are the purr things. We have had our moments of trying to ‘kidnap’ him and finish him off to no avail. And supposedly Santa Claus has bestowed Christmas magic on him so he moves around the Hotel Thompson. Yesterday morning, I woke up in my toddler bed and he was sleeping beside me looking at me with that mystic face. I squealed so loudly that I think I woke up our neighbors. That little misfit needs to stay out of my room thank you very much. And, it’s not just me he’s doing stuff with. Hemi, one of the purr things here, woke up the day before with that little creature asleep on his back. Hemi hissed to the high heavens and swatted at it with his big paw.
And, our friends – snorts. They are going through the same thing this time of the year with their ‘magical’ elves. One of dad’s buddies got up one morning, stumbled to the bathroom and took a shower. When he looked up, their little voyeur elf was watching him over the shower curtain. Talk about a psycho moment.
The same household as the shower episode, the next day the man’s wife found their little elf in her lingerie drawer. WTP (what the pig!) No wonder people walk on eggshells around the holidays with these little monsters running rampid.
So tell me, do you have a mischievous little elf in your house during the holidays? Is he getting into trouble or is he behaving (which I would find very strange). I’m thinking that all of these elves are cloned in the same factory of trouble. Perhaps us anipals need to ban together and write a letter to the Elf Union. These guys are trouble – I’m telling you TROUBLE.
Daddy Took a Tumble
Bless little daddy’s heart. He was out working in the yard with our next door neighbor, Big Daddy. Big Daddy was so nice to cut down a tree and a bush in our front yard of the Hotel Thompson. Mommy has always hated these two trees. They kind of cover the front door area and you know for safety reasons, she wanted them gone like yesterday. So, Big Daddy cut them down and my daddy was helping to drag/carry them to the back of Big Daddy’s house where he would later burn them. In this picture to the left, Big Daddy’s house is on the right and our Hotel Thompson is on the left.
There’s a storm drainage that runs to the left side of the picture where you see all of those trees/bushes. . Now remember, daddy has limited vision. But, of course he could take the limbs and such to the back of the white shed in this picture, right?
Well, apparently not. Daddy was taking limbs down and miscalculated where he was. Before Big Daddy could scream or say anything, daddy went boom and walked right off in the storm drainage. It’s probably about 4-5 feet down. I’m not sure who was more scared – daddy or Big Daddy.
Daddy took a bad tumble. He didn’t get hurt bad. He got a lot of scrapes and bruises. It could have been a lot worse. But my daddy, he’s a toughie. He told Big Daddy that he had been hit worse during his football days. But still, that was a good tumble. I know that Big Daddy got scared.
And you know what, neither of them called mommy at the worky place right off… which was probably a good thing. Daddy went inside of the Hotel Thompson, took off all of his wet clothes and took a hot shower. Let’s just say he had more leaves on him than in a cup of hot tea.
He finally broke down and called mommy before she got off work just to give her a heads up. He acted like it wasn’t a big deal and everything was fine. But on the way home, Big Daddy called mommy and told her what happened as well. And it’s funny how men try to hide things. Daddy has let it out a little here and there about how when he fell, there were some sharp rocks that fell right between his legs but didn’t hit him. I think someone was watching out for my daddy this day.
Do ya’lls humans ever do anything like this that has scared the bejeesus out of you? I was so concerned this day with daddy that I kept going up to him and bunting him with my snout checking on him. I even whined a couple of times to let him know I was there for him.