He’s Not The Momma

I’m on a pretty good schedule at the Hotel Thompson.  I usually go to bed at the same time every night.  There’s a certain routine that I’ve gotten accustomed to doing nightly. 

Last night, the lights kept flickering on and off in our neighborhood.  I’m not sure if it was the storm passing through or if something was wrong with our grid.  I had been running up and down the hallway playing in the dark.  Which, mom doesn’t usually mind but without the lights on she thought I would hurt myself.  She told me to find a place and settle so I did in the front room on the floor.

It got close to bed time so mom asked dad to put me down for the night.  He told me to go to bed.  He really did.  But did I listen?  Of course not.  Why not you ask?  Because he’s not the momma.  I know that was the wrong answer and I really should have listened.  But, I wasn’t ready to go.  If momma didn’t take me, I felt like I was being cheated.  He persisted for a few minutes and finally told her that I wasn’t listening.  Gee, thanks dad for throwing me under the bus.  😦

Of course, momma told me to quit playing and go potty.  So, I wobbled down the hall and went to potty.  By the time I was done with that, mommy was in my room.  See, that’s all I asked for.  My normal routine.  I just wanted the momma. 🙂

She came in and cleaned up after me and picked up all of my toys in my bedroom.  She told me to get in bed and I did.  She pulled up my blankie, rubbed my back, gave me a snack and talked to me for a few minutes.  Her voice just soothes me to sleep.  Before I knew it, I was out like a light.  It was a long day and I played hard this evening.

After momma puts me to bed, she does a few things around the house getting ready for the worky place the next day. 

 

After she’s done, she *always* comes back in my room and checks on me to make sure I’m asleep.  Last night was no different.  I was still counting sheep.  She pulled the blankie up around me and told me softly good night.

Isn’t she the best?  You gotta love the mommy.

 

 

 

Dear Bacon –

Dear Bacon,

I know Halloween has past but I had to share with you my costume.  My master was the most creative I believe.  Can you guess who I am?  Really, can you?  He dressed up like Herman and mom dressed up like Lily.  We were a hoot Halloween night.  Sorry I couldn’t make your cyber party.  Signed Barky Brewster

Dear Barky Brewster,

That is so original!  Kudo’s to your master for such a creative costume.  I love it!  That’s one of mom’s favorite shows and we watch it on the television in my room at times.  By all means, you win top dog!

 

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Hey Pig,

You talk about it being hard to maintain your good looks – don’t I know it.  It don’t come easy.  With beauty comes pain and trust me little man – I gotta lot of pain to keep these good looks!  Signed Mabel

Dear Mabel,

Um, well you are just absolutely darling.  There’s a lot of work in that beauty there.  I can see it… lots of it.  Bless your little heart for taking the time to go all out and be all you ewe can be.  Good job my lady friend.  Keep up the great work!

 

 

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Dear Bacon,

What am I to do?  I’m a lab rat junky.  I can’t get enough of the sweets.  Look at my body.  I need help.  I need an intervention.  Call Richard Simmons – call the Biggest Loser – call someone!  OOHH, can you call me a pizza while you’re at it too?  Signed Tiny

Dear Tiny,

First of all, admission is the first step.  You need to be that candy and cookie down.  Then, turn away and wobble away from it.  You don’t need that junk food.  I myself prefer my fruits and vegetables.  I say find some veggies that you like and start munching on them.  You don’t need an intervention – you just need to learn to say no.  Good luck my furry friend.  P.S. If you come over to my house, I can help you.  Me and the purr cats can chase you up and down the hall.  That’ll help 🙂  All for a good cause my friend.  All for a good cause.

 
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Dear Bacon,

It just takes one smarty to dare you to do something before you do it and get in trouble.  It’s all laughter and taunting until someone gets stuck over a fence.  I can’t go forward.  I can’t go backwards.  Of course Henry is just standing in the back ground laughing his behinney off.  Don’t be me little man.  Don’t take the bait.  You would be worse off than I.  Signed Cows Can’t Jump

Dear Cows Can’t Jump,

That is quite the little dilema you have there.  At least Henry can do is push you from behind to help you over.  That’s gotta hurt.  Just remember my friend – payback is a you know what.  Insert evil snort 🙂
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Dear Bacon,

WHHAAZZZ UUUPP?  I’ve been following you for a bit my little dude.  I think its time to cut the skirt tails of your momma and live at large.  Get you some bling and start getting out more.  Come visit me little dude.  I got it going on at my farm.  Signed Rebel ReKognize

Dear Rebel ReKognize,

OK.  I’m going out on a limb here.  You probably didn’t get a whole lot of loving from you mom growing up did you?  Did you miss something from your childhood?  You know you don’t have to have the pierced tongue, or the dark shades or the bling in your mouth to be cool.  Being cool doesn’t equate fitting in.  You can be your own horse and shine in your own way.  You don’t have to ‘fit’ in a group to be cool.  You can be cool just by being you.  Think about it my friend.  HUGS to you.