Dear Bacon – Part III

Dear Bacon,

What’s happening pig?  So like here is the problem dude.  I think like I’m a happening cat.  I got the moves like Jagger.  I wear my hoodie.  My parents still want to treat me like a kitty – what’s up with that? Signed Rap Cat

Dear Rap Cat,

Slow your roll purr thing.  You are still a babe.  You’re not a member of the group Stray Cats.  I’m not sure if you been told this but you are pussy cat, not a rap cat.  I hate to be the bearer of the bad news.  Quit trying to go all jive in front of your parents.  Save the rap when they go to bed at night.  I bet they would love to hear that in the middle of the night. 

Dear Bacon,

I have a small problem.  As  you can see, my parents think I’m their personal marshmallow holder.  I can’t help that my fur is thorny.  What am I to do? – Signed Thorny

Dear Thorny,

Give me a minute to pick myself up from off the floor.  I’m sorry dude.  That’s the funniest picture I’ve seen in some time.  You’re parents are really original.  I know it may seem like a pain in your side – HA – but go with it.  They can rent you out to parties and such – you can make money and save for your retirement.  I say go with it and make the best out of it little guy.

Dear Bacon,

Finally I have proof with this picture!  When I get in trouble, my parents put me in a corner and point their fingers at me.  What’s a kitty to do? Signed – Hands Up in the Air

Dear Hands Up in the Air,

Take your hands down from the air.  Use those paws that you have and swat those fingers.  They won’t be putting baby in the corner anymore.

 

Dear Bacon,

I’ve read your blogs.  You talk about bed head.  Come on pig – look at this picture.  I think I have you down on bed head.  Signed – Bed Head Extraordinaire

Dear Bed Head –

You got me.  Now please go shower and fix yourself up.  You’re scaring the viewers.