Do you know about the Rorschach tests? You may know them better as the ink blot tests. I’ve been looking at them a lot lately trying to test my IQ. Let me show you a picture and then you’ll know exactly what I’m talking about. Take for instance the picture here to the right. What do you see? Most people would say a butterfly. I see a dragon in full flight with the picture being taken over him. See how it works? I personally think, and this is coming from Dr. Bacon, that you can do the same thing with snouts. Snouts are like fingerprints to humans. We all look different.
Take my snout for an example. Look closely at the markings. What do you see? Mom sees the outline of the character Mickey Mouse. This makes me different from other pigs and their snouts. What do you see? I like to refer to this strategy of looking at pig snouts as PigRorschach or AKA PigInk Blot. I’ve got a couple of more snouts for you to examine below. As you will see, I have a very unique and unusal snout marking.
Mom is forever taking pictures of me. I have to get used to it. She catches me at my best and worst. Take for instance this picture. I was having a me moment. The orange sheet is my bankie. I love my bankie. I sleep on it. I play on it. I roll around on it. Sometimes mommy hides food in it and I root around in it. I love my bankie.
Last night, my bankie was in my room where mommy put it. I used my mouth and snout and I drug my bankie all the way down the hall and into the living room. Now, this is a lot of bankie. You have to know that. It’s an old king size sheet that mom gave me.
I drug my bankie to the front room and was playing with it all over the living room floor. I was pulling it here and there and rolling around in it. Of course, this led to the purr thing Hemi wanting to play with it as well. One time, he hid in the bankie and I didn’t know. I went to roll and rolled next him. He moved and I jumped up barking and running down the hall. Call me a scaredy pig – LOL.
Thank you so much for the questions and pictures that you are sending in to the Dear Bacon column. I’m getting enough for a weekly column now – YAY!! Remember, send your questions and/or pictures to me at BaconThompson@gmail.com
I think I’ve found a new career for myself. I absolutely love wrestling bro. I’ve got a move that I like to refer to as the Butt Kisser. I get my opponent down and sit on his face. Sometimes I get excited and well a little air is exchanged if you know what I mean. What do you think – I got a career or what? Signed Butt Kisser
Dear Butt Kisser,
You definitely got some moves pooch. I’m not even going to ask how many so-called friends you tried this move on in your neighborhood. What do you see some fellow canines walking down the street, chase after them, sit on their faces and expel gas? What is your street name there again? Running Gas Bomb? Bully the Butt? Come on – back off the moves. Unless you’re in the arena actually wrestling, I think I’m safe to say that your fellow canines don’t appreciate what you’re doing.
Oh man, I’m like so excited man. I love coke man. The more the merrier man. I don’t care where it comes from – I must have it little man. What am I to do? – Signed High on Coke Man
Dear High on Coke Man,
Back up from the straw little squirrel. Go ahead, no walk away. You are so hyper that given a hamster wheel you could make enough energy to put GE out of business. You don’t need the stimulants. You need a 12 step program. One day at a time. Admission is the first step. You can do it!
I love to cook! My passion is cooking! I don’t care about chasing the post man or milk man – I’d rather cook for them. My parents don’t know about this. Secretly at night, I go into the kitchen and act like Julia Child. It’s so much fun! Of course, I clean everything up before the master gets up. Should I come out of the closet? – Signed Chef on the Download
Dear Chef on the Download,
Dude, if you can cook – come out of the closet. Don’t walk – RUN! I’m sure your parents would enjoy being waiting on by their dog for a change. Just remember basics like washing your paws okay. Practice on and maybe you can get on Hell’s Kitchen next year!
I hate my job. You know those pesky people who call you from credit card companies trying to collect money? That’s me. (Hey, it happens! You know there’s a talking bear movie fixing to come out called Ted.) We do collections. Well, I hate calling people and trying to collect money. I may look all cute and everything but my voice is really deep like Samuel Jackson so they hired me for the job. But, I’m not like that. I want a new job. What should I do? – Signed Collector with a Big Voice
Dear Collector with a Big Voice,
Little dude, there is a special place for your work kind. Not talking specifically about you in general but your trade. Why don’t you find something that you like. I’m sure there are a lot of different phone positions for a breed of your disposition. Try some different telemarketing jobs until you find something you like.
It was bound to happen. This morning I was eating my mixture of piggy pellets and cheerios. I was down to my last nibble and I got choked. I’ve gotten choked in the past but this was different. I didn’t know what to do. I couldn’t catch my breath. Mom gets on the floor to help me. What do I do? I walk over to her, jump in her lap and throw up all over her.
I’ve never thrown up before in my 9 months. Things aren’t suppose to come out there – only in. My little body starts shaking. I’m scared – mommy hold me. Mom cleaned me up, pulled off her clothes and grabbed a clean blankie to wrap us both up in. She then held me and rocked me until I started feeling a little better. She didn’t complain one time about me being sick or upchucking all over her. She should get an award or something like that.
After mommy rocked me to sleep, she put me down in my bed for a nap. She left daddy specific instructions on how to take care of me and to watch me today for any further signs of being icky. She’s already called home once and checked on me. What a swell mom! So, it looks like I’m going to be down for the day in bed. I can’t do much. Mommy says I need my rest so I can feel better when she gets home from the worky place. Daddy is going to fix me some chicken soup later. I wonder what that is? It sounds delicious – it has chicken it has to be good!
I know a lot of you have been axiously awaiting my surprise that I mentioned last week. You can admit it – you probably haven’t eaten because you are so excited about it. Well, the wait is over. I am ready to reveal my surprise.
A lot of times, my parents go out to dinner and they are not greeted by their names anymore. It’s more like, “Hey, there’s Bacons parents” or “How’s Bacon doing?” Dad never thought he would be known by a pig but now he is. Everyone wants to know about my antics. And, then there’s the new people that mom meets that are just taken aback that she has a pig son. People are in awe of my talents and skills.
So, what does mom decide to do? She talks to me about it and we come up with an extraordaire thing. I’m going to share it with you. Please let me know what you think 🙂
I am very serious about my apples. I love them. Doesn’t matter what kind – I love them all. Usually, mommy slices one up for me and that’s my bedtime snack. Well this weekend she did something unusual. She gave me an entire apple, unsliced. At first, I didn’t know what to do with it. It smelled familiar but wasn’t sliced out. I finally figured it out though – I’m a smart piglet. I hope you enjoy the video 🙂
Huge hogs and kisses to hutchagoodlife – Nibbles, Nutty, Bingo and Buddy – ya’ll rock! I am so taken back that you nominated little old me for the Reader Appreciation Award. I’m of the age now that I know what it is and I am so excited! I try so hard to amuse my readers with my life in general – what I do, how I eat, what I think about crazy stuff in my piggy life, my mommy and of course my new addition of the Dear Bacon column. I’m so appreciative of all of my followers and supportors. I love expressing my world here on this blog. I’ve come a long way since writing on the walls in my bedroom. I’m sure mom appreciates my adventure. 🙂 So let’s pay it forward!
You should definitely check out their blogs if you haven’t already. They are the best! Here’s what you do:
1. Incldue the award log somewhere in your blog.
2. Answer the 10 questions below for fun if you want to.
3. Nominate the blogs that you enjoy.
4. Pay the love forward. Provide your nominee’s links in your post and comment on their blog to let them know they’ve been included and invited to participate.
5. Pay the love back with gratitude and a link to the blogger(s) who nominated you.
Now – here are the questions:
1. What is your favorite color? My favorite colors are burgundy and yellow. My room is painted this so far. Mom is still working on doing my room.
2. What is your favorite non-alcoholic drink? I only drink water. Mommy is afraid to give me anything else. A piglet friend of ours, Sushi, got grape KoolAid to drink one time and now she will only drink that. Mommy is afraid I would be the same way – so water it is.
3. What is your favorite animal? Of course pigs! I also like the purr things and the barky things.
4. Do you prefer Facebook or Twitter? Mommy has Facebook. I had my own page but I didn’t like it. Sometimes I use moms when she goes to bed and post on that.
5. What is your favorite pattern? hooves of course – Snort
6. Do you prefer giving or getting presents? Getting – especially that of food. I’m a HUGE foodie!
7. What is your favorite number? 5 – there’s 5 of us: Mom, Dad, Hemi, MouseGirl and myself.
8. What is your favorite day of the week? The weekends! Mom is home and we all have fun together.
9. What is your favorite flower? Carnation – they are so pretty.
10. What’s your passion? Teaching the world all about miniature pot bellied piglets. We are fun!
Now we are going to nominate a few blogs that we love and want to have this award to prove their awesomeness!
http://virginiaplantation.wordpress.com/ Belle Grove Plantation Bed and Breakfast – WOW – This is the birthplace of James Madison. The pictures are out of this world. I would love to go there and root around in all of this history!
http://knowthesphere.wordpress.com/ Knowsthesphere – Jeremiah is a human that thinks deep thoughts. He really makes me sit back and think about things he writes. I love this guy. I give him two hooves up!
Lots of HOGS AND SNOUT KISSES!
Thank you so much for the award. I look forward to reading about everyone in the future. Be sure stay tuned in for more of my life!!
What’s happening pig? So like here is the problem dude. I think like I’m a happening cat. I got the moves like Jagger. I wear my hoodie. My parents still want to treat me like a kitty – what’s up with that? Signed Rap Cat
Dear Rap Cat,
Slow your roll purr thing. You are still a babe. You’re not a member of the group Stray Cats. I’m not sure if you been told this but you are pussy cat, not a rap cat. I hate to be the bearer of the bad news. Quit trying to go all jive in front of your parents. Save the rap when they go to bed at night. I bet they would love to hear that in the middle of the night.
I have a small problem. As you can see, my parents think I’m their personal marshmallow holder. I can’t help that my fur is thorny. What am I to do? – Signed Thorny
Give me a minute to pick myself up from off the floor. I’m sorry dude. That’s the funniest picture I’ve seen in some time. You’re parents are really original. I know it may seem like a pain in your side – HA – but go with it. They can rent you out to parties and such – you can make money and save for your retirement. I say go with it and make the best out of it little guy.
Finally I have proof with this picture! When I get in trouble, my parents put me in a corner and point their fingers at me. What’s a kitty to do? Signed – Hands Up in the Air
Dear Hands Up in the Air,
Take your hands down from the air. Use those paws that you have and swat those fingers. They won’t be putting baby in the corner anymore.
I’ve read your blogs. You talk about bed head. Come on pig – look at this picture. I think I have you down on bed head. Signed – Bed Head Extraordinaire
Dear Bed Head –
You got me. Now please go shower and fix yourself up. You’re scaring the viewers.
This is me last night during dinner. Momma says, “You wanna eat?” and I’m there with bells on. I don’t play around when it comes to food. Every night, I get piggy pellets, salad mix, tomatoes and carrots. Sometimes dad throws in sliced cucumbers – yum. And it has to be served in my piggy plate. I’m spoiled like that. I eat what I love last so that means all of the salad, tomatoes and carrots have to come out. I eat the piggy pellets first and then go back. I don’t have to worry about the purr things eating any of my food – they don’t like salads. They’re one of my staples.
After I get done eating, I go potty and then sometimes I will play with the purr things and other times I settle with mommy for snuggle time. Last night, the purr things were waiting for me to come back and play. They’re great company. The orange one on the floor, that’s Hemi. He’s a Hemingway cat that has extra toes. Believe me, you can tell he has extra toes when he slaps you on the fanny! The black one on the couch, that’s Mouse Girl – Mouse for short. She’s a Maine Coon cat. She looks big and mean but she’s a pussy cat. LOL – gotta go play now. Take care my friends!!